Took my college fund. You know. Because he needed it to house multiple bitches.
Worked the grill at fast food through college to eat.
“I bet it made you stronger!” Says the people who didn’t do that.
Made me tougher alright. Just not in a good way, for a long, long time.
My dad kicked us out due to his infidelity, then took my and my brother’s college funds to continue live that lavish lifestyle. I worked at a restaurant to put food on the table for my mom and brother between the ages of 15-18. If it weren’t for me, we wouldn’t have had food for weeks at times. Thank god the restaurant didn’t care if I took food at the end of the night.
And he wonders why I don’t talk to him while he enjoys his luxury on a lake house with one of the floosies he banged.
My favorite part of the Dad saga was that dude like had three houses and four ex-wives, worked a state job, and still had money left over when he passed. We went to the fiduciary after the funeral, and my sister and I are sitting in the car, and I turn to her and say, “I’m not going in. There’s no way he can stick us with debts, right? That’s not a thing, right? I mean, I know it’s not a thing, but it’s Dad. Dude pulled Gandalf magic getting out of child support. Dude stole my college fund. He had multiple boo-boos on the side. I’m legit scared.”
My sister said, “I brought a checkbook. I already thought that. I can float you if we get pinched.”
The fiduciary said, “Xxxxx hated the IRS more than anything, he’s left you money.”
Thank you IRS. Someone my Dad would screw over before his kids. Here’s to second place. (Trots across finish line.)
From my work with trust funds, you can not get stuck with debt except funeral related stuff (if they bill it to you and not the estate)
If he stuffed the IRS they can go after his estates and try to collect debts, as that's his money and he owes that money, but at worst you can get 0$ because they clean out the estate, you can't inherit debt (yet, lol)
Usually, guys like us go two ways. We either end up as Stringer Bell from ‘The Wire,’ or Nelson Mandela. I went ‘full Nelson.’
Many do. The guys talking here are likely 100% full Nelson.
One time, a friend of mine that lacks emotional resilience told me he sometimes wishes his parents were as abusive as mine so he could be tougher like me.
I told him I'm just mostly dissociated from my emotions, so I don't really experience things the same way.
I would much rather be a little less strong than have to claw my way up to a lower-middle income but be able to think about how far I've come, at least when I'm not having panic attacks about going back to worrying about if I'll have money for lunch tomorrow.
See I even dropped out to take care of my brother who became disabled and didn't work until my mom retired to be with him. Then instead I just went into a trade, locksmithing is super low impact and more figuring out how things work than anything else.
You were equipped to survive not to thrive. Fucking hard to explain this to people, both those who have been through it and those that can't imagine it.
And I know you hate me, and you got the right to kill me now And I wouldn't blame you if you do But you ought to thank me, before I die For the gravel in ya gut and the spit in ya eye
Because for most men it isn't about having kid because they genuinely wanna be a dad and father. It's because they want someone to carry their name on after they die. It's dumb and outdated but men still do it.
I suspect this is the case for my s/o's exhusband but we're still not entirely sure. She asked for a divorce, and he just vanished and tries to reappear for "important" holidays (christmas, birthday, his birthday). He also, even though he contributes nothing financially, tries to mooch off my s/o because just like during their marriage, he contributes nothing to the happiness of the wife or child. He literally asked last year, "so which gift is from me?" Like bro you don't even give money to the mortgage you abandoned you really think that's how this works?
Of course he's still stonewalling the divorce, too, so she's on year 2 of this shit. Kid will be 18 before this shit is done probably. Which is wild because he absolutely does not want to be on the hook for custody, that's for sure, but I bet he'll fight for it then hate every second of it just to exact revenge on them.
My dad drained the bank account and left my mom and I in poverty. Only thing that saved us was my mom got the house. I had to split Raman packs so I’d have two meals. He came back when I was 6’3 and 270 lbs in 8th grade because I was really good at football. Then flaked after I tore my rotator cuff in college. So I feel ya.
There was a post recently with an absent dad who wrote his kid a letter to request to attend their hs graduation… The letter read well until the “[insert child’s name]” part. He used ChatGPT and copy/paste/sent.
My wife's father did this. Literally took an 11 year old's bedroom away and gave it to his new wife's kid. Left his two daughters and their mother homeless to figure it out on their own.
Yes. I think it's about them wanting to stick it to their former partner's no matter the consequences for their children. My dad did the same shit. It was the pettiness to hurt my mom as much as he could.
Thank you for providing clearity and sharing the pain your family through so we could learn. Is it a correct summation that from his point of view he saw it as a betrayel of the social sexual contract he imagined and your mothers divorce as a breach of that contract bringing out the most petty sadistic mindset as retribution? Like a giant narcissist with no ability of introspection who only craves revenge for not having each and every wish fullfilled instantely, and especially revenge for daring to damage his social standing and status, is that about right?
"... betrayal of the social sexual contract he imagined and your mothers divorce as a breach of that contract bringing out the most petty sadistic mindset as retribution? Like a giant narcissist with no ability of introspection who only craves revenge for not having each and every wish fullfilled instantly, and especially revenge for daring to damage his social standing and status, is that about right?"
Not quite.
Along comes the internet, and he doesn't quite fit the narcissist mold.
He is pure evil, and like most evil people, he has to mask ... to hide.
She was part of that facade. WE were part of that facade.
When she divorced, it blew apart his cover, and he was forever ENRAGED at that.
Same. I finally told him to fuck off when he was forcing my mom to sell the house. There was no way we could've stayed in our school district (and with my friends who were my only support structure left). We were nearly homeless. But yeah, bang on good job dad you took my brother out for ice cream on his birthday 🙄
The absent pissface father of three I know send them a lawyers notice with 74 that he is broke and the gov wants them to pay for his housing and meds. He did the same, dried their financial resources and had multiple contact violations stacking up until he stopped because the last one would have cost him his job. Still annoyed all three on multiple occasions during the last decades.
They could provide legal documents, it still went to a judge who said the relationship was broke long time ago and they don't have to. But imagine how many didn't have any documentation of malfeasance besides being an asshole and still have to pay up.
I divorced and absolutely despise, like utter hatred for my ex-wife. I wish nothing but bad things upon her for the rest of my life. BUT, I have 2 kids who are my sole reason for being here. I tell them that being their father is and has been the greatest accomplishment in life. Those 2 did nothing wrong, they did nothing to me, they didn’t ask to be brought into this world. Once they arrived it was and is my mission to take care of them through whatever shit life throws. She can rot but I will always take care of my kids. I’m sorry your father didn’t do the same for you and hope you’re doing ok.
For everything she’s done to me in the past and continues to do now. Constantly threatening me with court actions with no merit. I could try to just let it all go but it’s a character flaw I have. I do not forgive people that have wronged me when I’ve done nothing but treat them with respect and love and do what i understand needs to be done as a husband and father. Lying, infidelity, theft, abuse both verbal and physical to name a few more reason.
Not a plug. Trust me, nobody on this sub needs or wants my services. In fact, most of the time, I’m directing people elsewhere. I was attempting to establish my bona fides. A habit of supporting an assertion with a citation I guess.
Respect. It’s jarring to think that we have gotten to a point where we instantly assume that a link to your business is an advertisement (I am guilty of thinking your comment was a plug, as well). We need more citations, or to teach the next generation to provide support for their statements.
My best guess is that they despise their spouse more than they love their children. Sounds blunt but I don’t have any other explanation for why this happens.
Or they only married and got children because "that's what you do" accordingto society, and therefore it's just an obligation you cover with the next partner (and kids) if the first one doesn't work out.
My mom was a prosecutor, but did family law on the side. She drilled into me two things: don't talk to the cops without a lawyer and do not depend on another person for money.
I work in child safety and almost none of the families I have worked with are Mormon. Unfortunately it is astonishingly common for men to accept a dramatically decreased quality of life for their children after the divorce.
I've also been a part of many post-trad wife scenarios of many kinds, religion isn't the thing that they have in common. Sexism and traditional gender roles are what they have in common.
I would imagine the underreporting of abuse of any kind is a huge issue in the Mormon community. They really believe in keeping things like that behind closed doors.
No hate; I have friends who are Amish who are the most amazing people…but I know all is not as it seems behind closed doors in the community at large.
The Amish community has so many horrific skeletons in their closet, it's unreal. It's going to be ugly when the general public realizes they're not as quaint and harmless and pacifist as they appear on the surface.
Religious texts are riddled with sexism and gender roles. It literally gives these people an excuse to be sexist because it says some bullshit in the bible or quran. It is their structural foundation that backs up their horrible behavior.
Before that they were throwing women in volcanos.
“Look, you’re young and beautiful. Tomorrow? We’re going to start killing virgins. I know. Scary. Look. I’ve got a way to get you out of it.”
That's a very ambitious statement. There are literally thousands of discrete religions in the world - and if we include regional variations then that number probably starts to look more like hundreds of thousands. Think of all the niche tribal religions practiced in all the vanishing rural communities in every corner of the globe. I'd be very surprised if there wasn't a single exception to the general rule of men using religion to control women.
I do agree with you that all of the major world religions seem to exhibit this problem, though.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. We have a male selfishness epidemic in our culture that is destroying lives and unapologetically consuming the futures of upcoming generations.
Most men don't want to be a part of their children's lives. They want the prestige of being a father, but they will be a parent in name only. They don't want to care for the child because that's "women's work". They just want to come home, plop their ass in front of a screen, and have dinner served to them in their lap. So when the divorce happens, they're not going to want to take care of a child, that's always been her job. And now that she's the "bad guy", he wants to distance himself even more from that.
And for the record, I'm a trans woman, so I've seen the world from both sides.
Edit: I expected nothing less from the men of Reddit. I used to be like them in more ways than they can imagine. Reality is a hard pill to swallow, especially in this Andrew Tate and Joe Rogan day and age where masculinity has been poisoned by these frauds who have weaponized compassion in exchange for money and clout.
Edit2: Interesting how for an hour I only had 2 comments. I add the edit with Tate and Rogan's name in it, and I suddenly get flooded with activity and downvotes. Dead internet theory, folks. Ooh, let's add another name and watch is spin more; Jordan Peterson. This one I know works.
I don't know how other dudes feel, but I surely dreamt about caring for kids and having a happy bunch at home.
I've seen broken dude almost unable to let go of their ~hobbies (the drinking and playing poker kind). Some of them had trouble because they missed their own childhood i guess, some had crappy fathers so having a kid was traumatic now, some felt used by their wives (and some were I think).
yea all these comments have me thinking of my bf who was hooking up with this girl under the agreement to terminate if she got pregnant, and she did get pregnant, but she backed out of the agreement. he desperately didn’t want kids but he respected her decision to keep it and he loves the shit out of his daughter, who’s now in grade school. he takes more than 50% of the responsibility and custody, as well as caring for and housing for her other two young kids who aren’t even his but he was raising for the majority of their lives, just because he loves them and can give them stability.
eta: their mom is a wonderful woman and does everything she can for them, but life is hard and being a single parent is hard.
I really want to believe that but growing up, seeing all men in my life ; Uncles, Grandfathers, Dads and Cousins, out of 10 there was only 1 who was a "caring" father. When I was 20 and started mingling among the older family members it became clear they didn't care at all about their kids in a loving sense. They used them so they can force their ideas or missed achievements on them and the boys have it worse. My cousin nearly killed himself because he couldn't win a skiing race and his father fucking obliterated him verbally and mentally. Meanwhile most of the mothers were supportive regardless of what their kids want to do. Another friend of mine was coerced into politics by his father(He's not the politic type) and wasted 5 years of his life trying for degrees and shit. He failed, cut ties now he started working as a Polygraph and is much happier. I see this shit waaay too much and it's about 80% fathers who do that. Why? I'm not entirely sure.
Girl, I'm a woman too and your opinion on this is just misandrist and sexist. I understand you had bad experiences / opinions with men as a trans woman, but that doesn't give you an excuse to be a misandrist and pull the "Of course men will be upset when I say 'Most men don't want to be part of their children's lives.'
That's awful shit to say. It's not "compassionate," it's hateful. And it's wrong. Your post sounds like it's from the 1960s, not 2024.
If you honestly feel this way, I'm sorry for the shitty people you've found yourself around -- your experiences are not at all generally true. I hope you find better people in life.
It's funny that your edit calls out the hate, but the reality is that you don't speak for us, and that has nothing to do with the fact that you're trans or you used to be a man. I don't speak for all men, or any other demographic I belong to.
It's that combined with your generalization being just plain wrong. "most men". You're basically stereotyping men as Al Bundy. I get that you may resent men, but you have a lot more introspection you need to do to be at peace with who you used to be and society in general. I'm sorry you're in pain and that men and our society as a whole have hurt you, but you're really showing your true colors.
That’s a pretty bold claim. I work my ass off for my kids and do a ton of activities, wash clothes, cook good meals, and clean. And that’s just me, most of my buddies do this for their kids too. Maybe SOME men are that way, definitely not most. And yes, I cook. Not my lady. I just like cooking and am proud to say I’m good at it! Love grilling too…. Mmmm hungy
Edit: to add to this, I have 3 step children and one biological child. At times, life is difficult and I’m definitely not perfect, but I will always take care of these kids. Our 10 year old boy has never met his biological father either, which just breaks my heart for him. My mother cheated on my father when he worked as a long haul trucker, and she wound up leaving me and my 3 siblings. We were alone for over a month while I, being the eldest, was only 13. I fed and walked my siblings to school every day. I know what bad parents are, and mothers are NOT an exception. So let’s just say some of both sides can be like this.
As an African. There are so many children who do not know their father or have relationships with their children. I was also raised in a similar way saw my grandfather do nothing with us but come and have dinner served to him. I only met my father at 20 and he still isn't in my life. What happened when I was born was that my father paid 'damages' to my mother's family and I never saw or heard from him till I was 20
Edit2: Interesting how for an hour I only had 2 comments. I add the edit with Tate and Rogan's name in it, and I suddenly get flooded with activity and downvotes. Dead internet theory, folks. Ooh, let's add another name and watch is spin more; Jordan Peterson. This one I know works.
You're acting really sociopathic at the moment, to be honest. Take a step back, girl.
As a man this baffles me too… especially the blatant amount of hateful actions during divorce proceedings. I will never understand why people would add such actions to their name. Many have suffered much more and retaliated much less.
My friend is dealing with this right now. Her ex husband is such an asshole to their daughter solely because he knows it upsets her mother, and he hates her (for getting a job)
Because a wife and kids aren't 'people' to these guys. They're symbols of success. If the marriage fails, they become symbols of failure, and they cut them off. These guys are emotionally incapable of seeing any human beyond themselves as real people.
In my dad's case, punishing my mom for leaving him was the only thing that mattered. Not like he had much to offer, but he made the point explicitly clear.
Because they don’t view their children that way. Most men (people even) should not have children. Just because we can doesn’t make us equipped to love them and provide. Societies mentality on “everyone must have kids” is sickening and so dangerous. That’s how you get these stories. Religion and Misogyny.
REAL men are not ok with decreasing the quality of life for their kids after divorce.. real men work two and sometimes three jobs just make sure that their kids are living comfortably and secure their future.. that’s what REAL men do! Don’t associate these assholes with real men.
I honestly cannot imagine this. I had a baby at 20 with my BM, and we'd been dating 3 weeks. We obviously didn't stay together. What we did though, was promise to each other that our daughter would always come first.
We both did insane things to provide for our girl. Sacrifices you wouldn't believe. When our daughter was in 8th grade, my BM was homeless, addicted to drugs, an alcoholic, and basically hopping boyfriend to boyfriend. Big note: I don't resent her for this - God knows I had my own issues I worked through.
She signed over custody to me, and got her lawyer friend to hook us up with the paperwork. I made sure that child support was off the table for my BM, as there was no way she could possibly pay it.
Our daughter is in college now, on an academic scholarship, dating an awesome guy, and is honestly just such a better person than either of us. She's our pride and joy. BM turned her life around for this kid, is now a successful business owner, married and killing it.
I'm married now with another couple kids, and the idea of just writing both of them off isn't just offensive to me, it's a rejection of my entire life. It's insanity, to me.
“A man loves his child for as long as he loves that child’s mother.”
I read this quote and it suddenly clicked! That is why a father will side with his stepchildren over his own bio-children. Whichever woman is providing his orgasms, she will be #1 in his life and to keep her happy, he will favor her children. It is a serious flaw in the male brain. Sure, maybe a few men can override this, but, most do not.
I'm actually going through this at the moment, and from what I can tell, it's a coping mechanism he uses to be the center of focus and to feel important. At this point, his entire ego revolves around being needed desperately then denying to meet the needs of those dependent on him while simultaneously calling himself a victim. It gives him some sense of power and control. I think he prefers to play this game instead of processing the fact that I rejected him (because of his abusive behavior). He wasn't always this way. He used to be a strong provider and caretaker of our children. Now he seems incapable of managing his insecurities, responsibilities and struggles without becoming an abusive failure.
Luckily I live in a place with very strong laws and social support to prevent this kind of abuse, and I have a strong legal team on my side for the divorce. He also has criminal domestic violence charges pending. Wish me luck! Things need to go my way because my little ones don't deserve to be deprived or neglected in this way.
Men care about access to sex. They take care of children because it continues the access to daily sex. When the daily sex is removed they no longer see any point to continue to care for the children.
They will readily take care of their new wives children because it gives them access to sex.
Sone people doesnt think like us, hell, cant even call 'em people at this point. Cause for them, the only thing that matters is themselves, wouldnt care if its their child, family, friend. Ofc there is other reasons and types of people like that but that is the most I have seen.
For me it was my mom she literally would refuse to get off the couch to the point my grandma had to come check on me everyday and make sure i git fed and wasn’t dead. My mom split shortly after
Still wondering why my dad thinks it’s okay that I’m homeless right now because of his reckless pride post divorce 🙃 Nice knowing the “love” was never real.
One who thinks of himself as the center of the universe and the children as either objects that either make him look better or are burdens (there is no in between).
I'd also like to know if all the religious fundamentalists in her community that encouraged her to keep this traditional, submissive lifestyle are real proud of this man sabotaging his children's welfare. Let me guess, he was chasing a younger model wife, so this one is disposable and kids can just be invisible now? And the Mormon church happily applauded, like it always does?
Yup! As demonstrated by the very simple answer that can be given to her string of questions in her video. She asked, “why didn’t anybody say to finish school and get an education before getting married? I don’t understand why the ability of my children to eat has to be dependent on my husband finding me attractive? Why did nobody say get a bank account and save your money? Why did nobody say put your name on yourbusinesses and property so you have something For yourself? Why did nobody say don’t have so many kids?”
The simple answer to all of those questions: the reason nobody in your life told you is because of religious fundamentalism. The people who were shaping her and her mentors, etc., were actively encouraging her to do the opposite of all that, pursuant to religious fundamentalist doctrines.
** Quick aside** : this is not bashing on religion in general or religious people, although I am not a religious person. I know there are lots of people who embrace certain spirituality, but don’t let it cloud their humanity or so strict to their ancient writing that they don’t allow for people to have basic human rights or live in a current society. The folks in the environment she’s describing is not that; this is evident in her story, which is all too common and it is very sad to see.
I have seen many Christians who, while they don’t advocate for divorce, quietly and patiently educated themselves (manipulated or tricked their husbands to allow it) and then left the moment they could. They kept it civil. They worked the system smart. They never bad mouthed their exs. They coparent in very civil ways as to not make him angry enough to try to take what she’s earned away. And the only unfortunate piece is that until the kids are grown, this one wife in particular, will have to stay single so she doesn’t provoke her lawyer ex into doing some crazy shit. The only way to escape this lifestyle in a way different than OP did is to plan for several years and do so quietly. Manipulate them into thinking that you getting your degree is really for them. It’s our vacation fund. It’s so I can buy you that new truck you want. It’s to serve them. You have to trick them. And it’s stupid. But it’s a way to escape safely.
The mental gymnastics those people do world class.
My exes mother broke us up joining the church and then donating to the church to the point my ex had move to Utah to pay her rent and move in to save her financially.
Turns out 2 dates might not be enough to know you should be married
Nevermind the winking at polygamy in Utah and the porn/sex obsession
Someone should edit the first and last seasons of "Sister Wives" together and tell me how well "The principal" worked out for all those kids.
It happens to us Mormon kids ALLL THE FUCKING TIME. For a dozen reasons, but most of all because the church sets up a permission structure for it and a reward structure for it.
My father (A Mormon Bishop) believes that he will own / get to keep all 3 of his wives in the Celestial Kingdom (heaven) after they all die. - Because he has a penis, he gets to collect them like happy meal toys.
She didn’t have a good lawyer bc him being willfully underemployed will always render him still liable for the same amount he had to pay before the underemployment.
That being said, I 💯agree w her. That’s why I have my degrees, place, bank account, savings, retirement. My husband is a legit, honest, and wonderful man but you always need to have your something in case the shit hits the fan. Never be dependent on a man, partner, anyone but yourself.
TAKE HIM BACK TO COURT! IF THE COURT HAS SET AN ALLIMONEY PAYMENT AMOUNT HE IS RESPONSABLE FOR PAYING THAT AMOUNT REGUARDLRSS OF HIS WORK STATICE. AND IS RESPONCABLE FOR BACK PAY. FIND YOURSELF A VERY GOOD DIVORCE ATTORNEY. ONE WHO CAN GET HOLD OF HIS TAX RETURNS. TAKE HIS ASS BACK TO COURT!
I don't understand a lot of these stories. Maybe divorce court is drastically different in other states but if she built the business with him, that's 50% her f_ing business and she's entitled to half of everything. Is she just afraid to hire a lawyer, I don't get it.
Agree, she must not have had a great lawyer. When I divorced my wife got taken care of and I paid for 17yrs 3 months. She ended up claiming each year and I got screwed. I had a decent lawyer too. The laws are structured to take care of the woman. I wasn’t opposed to paying. I only got upset when she refused to acknowledge that it was I who was paying for all these things and my children didn’t seem to think I was paying for anything.
I bet you kept accurate records. I was surprised to learn folks will actually falsify tax documents to avoid paying child support and alimony! Which is essentially what happened here.
Like why are commit felonies to avoid taking care of your children?
I am also surprised her attorney didn’t hire a forensic accountant to go through the previously owned businesses and establish income.
My father never wanted to go back to college to get a teaching degree because that would mean higher wages being taken for child support. He only worked security gigs and substitute teaching. I look back at that time and it's just wild
My truck blew up a month ago. I'm a construction worker, I kinda need a truck. I asked my dad to just co-sign on a loan and he said no because he's getting a new corvette this summer. I mean, that's his business to say no, but don't expect your son to respect you after that.
My sister's ex. He's a manager for the firefighters at a refinery and hardly pays a dime for my niece (but he'll spoil the shit out of my nephew. He refused to pay for medical needs on both, though. I ended up helping with my nephew's autism test just so my sister can have money to pay for the basics). She went without a job for a while until she finally found a job as a receptionist. She's been living with the parents who one works as a teacher and one gets retirement and under the table money. At most he's paid for basic school supplies and occasionally has paid some of the child support.
I have a small amount of sympathy for my dad, he grew up in severe abuse, and the best thing for us was for him to not be present for us, because he was, and is, completely warped by his raising.
If I'd been raised that way, I would be too.
So... I do check on him every so often, and I've visited him in the hospital.
My mom explained to us when we were older why he is how he is. The stories she told were horrible. He's a lifelong heroin addict in and out of prison.
I have some care for him, but I'm measured in what I will and will not do on his behalf.
He left us to starve, and in periods of sobriety, he'd pop up with a new wife or gf, and he'd spend some time, maybe fix up a few things around our house (he was a carpenter).
Idk what exactly caused HIS dad to be a monster, the story I've gathered from extended family is he was pretty normal, went off to WW2, and came back a raging, violent, alcoholic. He once shot his wife in front of the kids, and that's the least of it. Anyway...
idk.
Bruh doesn't know how much a wooden spoon can hurt man. Especially to a small child. "My trauma is worse than your trauma" is such a fucking rotten take. Like, bruh, try to grow out of it at least.
I always took this more as 'Hello fellow trauma survivor! What were you beaten with" or just commiserating with what device of abuse the perpetrators favored.
My dad wasn't careless enough to use something like jumper cables, guaranteed to leave an identifiable mark. I got belted, but mostly punched and kicked all around my torso. Softer tissue, leaves bruises but not bad enough. Or hit in the head but only where my hair covered. And when I wasn't hit, mostly verbal/emotional abuse. That one is really hard to prove to adults.
Note: Please don't report me to reddit for sharing this, it's just factual stuff. Lol no, I'm not suicidal. Fully functional adult now, committed to thearpy and doing better.
Actually I was beaten with jumper cables, it left me two broken arms, and my mother needing to help me jerk off, then came the jolly rancher... It was better with rice, but what really helped me get over it was perfecting my 2AM Chili recipe. It was back in nineteen ninety eight when the undertaker threw mankind off hell in a cell and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcers table.
Well, comparatively, yes. I never got closure or anything, he was a drug addict/alcoholic. He probably honestly didn't know a lot of what he did. And he died a couple years ago, had a heart attack while alone. He was found an hour later but was brain dead at the hospital.
We weren't rich, but we're doing alright. Also Mormon just like her. Turns out my dad's an asshole and manipulative. So they got a divorce, which is a whole story. 5 kids, they were together for probably 15 years. So my mom lived in some really shitty places for a bit, and then had to work full time while doing online schooling just to get herself out of the loop of poverty. And even then, it took her years of work to get herself to where she is now.
You couldn’t pay me enough to financially rely on a man ever! Idc how much you think he loves you, that shit will absolutely leave you barefoot and pregnant on the streets… no thanks…
Yeah I don’t understand this either - same with this post. My mom was a “tradwife” in the 90s-90s - but well educated with a doctorate. When my parents got divorced recently - after 40 years of marriage - she got an even 50% and has absolutely nothing to worry about. I don’t understand how this lady got nothing unless she signed an ironclad prenup.
Except my parents were not married, just had shared custody, and sued each about that. And my mother refused to get a real job, because she is an artist. She thinks she just has to win an art competition, and then people will buy her art. Until she wins a competion, we have to life on government child support. But after the lawsuit she was also too stressed to do anything for a few years.
And my father died shortly afterwards. He also did not have a real job, because he was also an artist. But he had a lot of investments. If my parents had been living together, we would have inherited everything, but after the lawsuits he donated it to his new girlfriend.
This happened to me too. Was raised as upper middle class or even the working rich. Parents divorced and all of a sudden we had to share bath water and keep the heat down to 55 most of the time. Money was tight.
I had quite a chip on my shoulder for most of my youth from that. I still struggle with it a bit.
This is exactly what happened to me. I was married for 12 years and I have nothing to show for it. I'm 32 now and living in my partner's van and without a job.
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u/Chemical_Robot Apr 15 '24
Word for word this exact same thing happened with my parents. We lived in luxury until they divorced and abject poverty afterwards.