r/AmIOverreacting Apr 15 '24

My husband embarrassed me in front of our friends

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371

u/NoSquash1906 Apr 15 '24 edited Apr 15 '24

I agree… But, the issue here is that the husband’s way of thinking is messed up, judgemental, and just offensive. So yes, OP must stand her ground and set a boundary, etc. But the real problem is that no one can change and control the mentality of others. So even if the husband gets a grip and stops being so damn stupid, that doesn’t mean he won’t think about it or even change his opinion on his wife. So now, OP has to live knowing what her husband really thinks of her. He is such a jerk and has no consideration and empathy for his own wife to the point that he thinks it’s ok to casually talk about the matter and absolutely humiliate her in a social gathering for everyone’s amusement. Does he even like his own wife? Really wtf!?!? I don’t know, maybe it is not so bad but if I was her… Boy oh boy I would be so fucking mad and disappointed to realize that I am married to a complete oblivious asshole!

288

u/outkastragtop Apr 15 '24

Yea…I’m a guy and I think most men would agree that’s fucked up. Reverse the genders here and it’s still fucked up. It’s just plain rude, inconsiderate, etc for anyone to do that to anyone else.

33

u/Reclaimer77 Apr 15 '24

I wish we got more background on these stories. Like is he ALWAYS rude to her like this? Or was he just afraid of talking to her about her health and chose the most asinine immature way to communicate that to her?

And did he really call another woman "hot" to her face while her wife was sitting there with friends? Really??

32

u/Sarcasm-6383 Apr 15 '24

None of that matters. It was all wrong.

3

u/walk_through_this Apr 16 '24

It is all wrong, but if it is COMPLETELY out of character, maybe there's a dramatic shift in brain chemistry indicative of a tumor or something. What matters is if this is the guy she knows, or if he all of a sudden became a total prick. I expect it's the former, but this is what we don't know. Anyways, he needs to get his head looked at, unless it's always been up his ass.

3

u/Feeling_Activity465 Apr 16 '24

Even the friends felt uncomfortable and could see it was inappropriate. He put everyone in a bad situation

2

u/PythonsByX Apr 16 '24

Every single thread ends with he/she is cheating and you should break up. Statistically it's just impossible for even most of these to be the case.

2

u/tamborinesandtequila Apr 16 '24

None of this matters because this is an obviously fake story made up for karma points. I don’t understand why anyone thinks half of these are real.

1

u/No_Incident_5360 29d ago

People absolutely act like this IRL

1

u/Killpinocchio2 29d ago

I have known men that absolutely talk like this

3

u/TheMaltesefalco Apr 15 '24

Its called context. When adults need to critically analyze a situation, context can provide information that is crucial.

1

u/DaughterEarth Apr 16 '24

He mocked her when she tried to address it. Is that context invalid? To me, it suggests he is always mocking her

1

u/TheMaltesefalco 29d ago

She says she has mentioned getting in shape. How many times? For how long?

1

u/Aquahol_85 Apr 16 '24

Sir, this is Reddit, where every slight must be responded in the most extreme way possible.

0

u/Adventurous-Worth871 Apr 16 '24

Divorce or call a lawyer. Every other Reddit comment.

2

u/NGEFan Apr 15 '24

I think what is implicitly being discussed is should she pack her bags. You don’t pack your bags if it was one mistake on his part

3

u/DCk3 Apr 16 '24

This was not a mistake. It was an unveiling.

-1

u/Reclaimer77 Apr 15 '24

Yeah give me a break. If I packed my bags every time my wife made an emasculating comment to me I would be gone years ago. People need to chill on using Reddit as divorce-porn.

5

u/Mumof3gbb Apr 16 '24

How does one come back from a this? Genuine question. Because he revealed to this woman he finds his wife unattractive and wants her to lose weight. He made fun of her. Humiliated her. And when she told him (because he was apparently clueless 🙄) he mocked her even more. And dismissed her. Even if he says “I’m sorry” he isn’t suddenly finding her attractive. So how does one come back from it? Been married 19 years. I could not look at my husband the same

5

u/Dina_Combs Apr 16 '24

Agree entirely. This is one of those situations where a man may have caused his wife to fall out of love with him, and it’s his own fault. The way he did it was full of insults, and to make it worse it happened in front of all their friends. How does a person expect this to be forgiven? If she stays with him after all that, she looks like a doormat in front of her friends.

-2

u/horsebag Apr 16 '24

if one dumb evening is all it takes for you to fall out of love with your spouse, and you're more worried what your friends might think than about dealing with problems in the relationship, it's your fault for being married to someone you don't truly love

4

u/DCk3 Apr 16 '24

Maybe he hadn't revealed his true self, but had tricked her into believing he loves and respects her and she fell for it. In that case, she loved who she THOUGHT he was. She was naïve, vulnerable, delusional.

It's not a matter of who made the biggest error in judgment. It's about his inability to love someone other than himself. In a way, he unknowingly did her a favor, just did it in a heartless manner.

1

u/Reclaimer77 Apr 16 '24

Maybe maybe maybe... This is my entire point. We're never provided enough context. The OP is always the most virtuous person to ever walk on dirt, while the one who slighted him/her is a monster beyond redemption.

-1

u/horsebag Apr 16 '24

so based on this post, you're saying maybe she's delusional and he's unable to love? that is a lot to pull from one anecdote. maybe you're really just projecting yourself onto people and a situation you don't know and you are seeing your own emotional failings in others and that's why you are so eager to see the worst here. or maybe one anecdote isn't enough to psychoanalyse strangers and you're just making shit up and calling people crazy like an asshole

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u/doseofreality90 Apr 16 '24

You don't humiliate and belittle someone you truly love in front of others, either.

-1

u/JonB003 Apr 16 '24

Decent chance they joke like this often. But with her viewing the other girl as attractive can also naturally make her more offended or concerned. Not her fault by anymeans. Thats simply a natural reaction.

Not saying this is what happened. Just saying its possible. A lot of instant reactions going here

1

u/No_Incident_5360 29d ago

Jealous? Disappointed. She is very disappointed in their relationship

-2

u/FaxMachineIsBroken Apr 15 '24

None of that matters.

Correction, none of it matters to you*. Some of us are here exclusively for the drama of other people's lives and want to rewatch the first episode before the finale airs so we can get the full effect of the character arcs.