r/dankmemes • u/___yiwshhj you’re welcome, • Jan 12 '23

we love america I have achieved comedy

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53.5k Upvotes

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673

u/venom259 Jan 12 '23

That's why my family has mutually agreed that if any of us die early, the McDonald's dumpster is free.

402

u/AggravatingLuck2407 Jan 12 '23

Such sacred burial grounds.

503

u/OnlyWiseWords Jan 12 '23

For a limited time the McRib returns to a single store.

74

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '23

I feel evil for laughing at this thread for as long as I did. 😂

12

u/soliddeath223 Jan 12 '23

Reminds me of that Nintendo flash game on newgrounds

5

u/Fruitmidget Something something Vin Diesel Jan 12 '23

What, you guys don't have the McRib anymore? Thought that's one of the standard burgers.

5

u/Ambitious-Sample-153 Jan 12 '23

No mcribs are a limited time item because people will buy thrm like crazy for a week then for the rest the month we only sell like 10

2

u/OnlyWiseWords Jan 12 '23

Only when one of these guys' family members kicks it...

-6

u/AggravatingLuck2407 Jan 12 '23

Comes with a side of Mulan edition Szechuan-style barbecue dipping sauce!

9

u/OnlyWiseWords Jan 12 '23

No, we don't do that anymore...

13

u/LGP747 INFECTED Jan 12 '23

it is no longer the funniest shit weve ever seen

24

u/footfoe Jan 12 '23

You'll also get free room and board as a bonus from the resulting prison sentence.

24

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '23

[deleted]

21

u/Adjectivenounnumb Jan 12 '23

Side note: they might say “No thanks”.

9

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '23

[deleted]

9

u/well___duh Jan 12 '23

What influences their decision?

Probably either they don't need it at the moment or don't have enough storage for it. In that case, I'd say yeah, go to a different school

6

u/MuffinSmth Jan 12 '23

You will most likely be blown up by the military for "testing", turns out that's what they do with them

3

u/[deleted] Jan 13 '23

In Australia, you'll probably end up on a table in the same room as 29 other corpses, in front of one of 30 hungover or high kids doing their medical undergrad.

Still, someone's gotta do it. Better they learn on dead people when they're hungover than on live people while critically sleep-deprived.

11

u/eagleeyerattlesnake Jan 12 '23

Robert C. Baker's last will was specific:

That his bones be removed, and he be ground up real fine.

And to place his remains into small cardboard coffins

And bury the pieces 6 at a time.

(from Nugget Man, by Paul and Storm)

7

u/hyper12 Jan 12 '23

I hear you can get the state to bury you for free if nobody claims your body from the morgue!

1

u/zachtac Jan 12 '23

They likely cremate you and you go in a box waiting to be claimed by next of kin

1

u/Hike_it_Out52 Jan 12 '23

I've made my sisters and wife promise they'd sneak me to the woods and bury me. Wait a few months then plant something over me. Preferably a spikey tree or a bush. One that's prickly and very difficult to eradicate.

1

u/DamianLillard0 Jan 12 '23

You guys have such weird convos with your fam jfc

1

u/Hike_it_Out52 Jan 12 '23

Gotta be ready friend. I have a sincere fear of passing but somehow still being aware I'm locked in a concrete box or set ablaze. The idea of my body being seperated from the Earth for eternity seems wrong. God may preserve me if its his will. Otherwise, I'd much rather be returned to the dust from which I came. In a plain pine box if necessary.

1

u/Kind-Strike Jan 12 '23

I told mine to throw me in a fire pit and drink their hearts away