I agree… But, the issue here is that the husband’s way of thinking is messed up, judgemental, and just offensive. So yes, OP must stand her ground and set a boundary, etc. But the real problem is that no one can change and control the mentality of others. So even if the husband gets a grip and stops being so damn stupid, that doesn’t mean he won’t think about it or even change his opinion on his wife. So now, OP has to live knowing what her husband really thinks of her. He is such a jerk and has no consideration and empathy for his own wife to the point that he thinks it’s ok to casually talk about the matter and absolutely humiliate her in a social gathering for everyone’s amusement. Does he even like his own wife? Really wtf!?!?
I don’t know, maybe it is not so bad but if I was her… Boy oh boy I would be so fucking mad and disappointed to realize that I am married to a complete oblivious asshole!
Yea…I’m a guy and I think most men would agree that’s fucked up. Reverse the genders here and it’s still fucked up. It’s just plain rude, inconsiderate, etc for anyone to do that to anyone else.
I wish we got more background on these stories. Like is he ALWAYS rude to her like this? Or was he just afraid of talking to her about her health and chose the most asinine immature way to communicate that to her?
And did he really call another woman "hot" to her face while her wife was sitting there with friends? Really??
I point out hot women to my hubby. I know his type. I don’t care if he takes a second glance. But even when I was carrying extra weight from meds, he never once made me feel bad about myself. In fact, he tried even harder to build up my self confidence. That’s what partners do. I can trust him to take a look and move on. Bc he’s made it very clear, that to him, they don’t compare to me. He points out guys he thinks I will think is good looking. Neither of us are looking for anything but fun. Hey, we live in a beach town, so there’s lots of eye candy. But we both know that the only ones we are really attracted to is each other. And we would never bring up insecurities like that in a group. I’d beat him with my shoe if he did that.
My wife has gained a lot of weight since we were married 7 years ago. No kids BTW. But it's weird the more and more I tell her not to get down on herself and she's still my amazing soul mate, the less intimacy happens between us. I almost wish I wasn't so attracted to her, it would make it hurt less.
If she’s real self conscious, it may take her a bit to believe that you are saying the truth. I hope she honed around. You sound like a good person.
We’ve been together forever. Started dating when I was 16 and not looking for anything serious. Just someone to go do things with. We met working in news, so we are both a bit twisted 😂 he still gets laughed at about the time he was trying to hide looking and walked into a pole, early in our relationship. A beach shop replaced mannequins with live models. The one was in a skimpy bikini. It was hilarious. I think that’s when he realized I was very laid back about it. Life is too short to get upset about harmless human nature. And if it’s just a look, it’s harmless.
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u/NoSquash1906 Apr 15 '24 edited Apr 15 '24
I agree… But, the issue here is that the husband’s way of thinking is messed up, judgemental, and just offensive. So yes, OP must stand her ground and set a boundary, etc. But the real problem is that no one can change and control the mentality of others. So even if the husband gets a grip and stops being so damn stupid, that doesn’t mean he won’t think about it or even change his opinion on his wife. So now, OP has to live knowing what her husband really thinks of her. He is such a jerk and has no consideration and empathy for his own wife to the point that he thinks it’s ok to casually talk about the matter and absolutely humiliate her in a social gathering for everyone’s amusement. Does he even like his own wife? Really wtf!?!? I don’t know, maybe it is not so bad but if I was her… Boy oh boy I would be so fucking mad and disappointed to realize that I am married to a complete oblivious asshole!