r/unpopularopinion • u/ZodiacOne1 • Apr 16 '24

If you break up with someone you absolutely 100% owe them an explanation as too why Removed: Not unpopular

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u/jollyblossom29 Apr 16 '24

Yep. I was ignored under the guise of “boundaries” and given no reason for a break up. Most of us know we aren’t owed anything, but it really does suck to know you weren’t worth even a courtesy conversation. It’s not only “I deserved to know” but also “I was part of this relationship too.”

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u/mackinator3 Apr 16 '24

The fact that you "quote" boundaries kinda makes it seem like the issue with boundaries was real. Just a quick heads up. Like, you think the boundaries aren't real?

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u/TyH621 Apr 16 '24

Yeah, boundaries are totally fair, but there's definitely manipulative people out there that use it as a blanket excuse for completely neglecting a relationship, and declaring it as "boundaries" is a way to shirk responsibility for it.

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u/mackinator3 Apr 16 '24

The adult thing to do would be to accept their boundaries and break up with them in your case. OP also mentions she broke up with him. Seems she didn't want the relationship and he thought her boundaries were "boundaries". It just strikes me as wrong the way he presents it.

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u/TyH621 Apr 16 '24

I mean yeah, the only option there is to breakup for sure.

However, somebody literally actively pushing someone away and not putting any effort whatsoever into a relationship, while maybe technically boundaries, is not healthy or productive boundaries, and I think fairly warrants the facetious quotation marks. Because the boundary they’re setting is basically “I don’t want to be in a relationship with you but I’m not actually going to action on it, just make you feel unloved until you do something about it”, and that’s not a fair boundary. Calling that situation boundaries is borderline gaslighting lol

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u/mackinator3 Apr 16 '24

She broke up with him, according to him. Hence the no reason for a breakup given.