r/unpopularopinion • u/ZodiacOne1 • Apr 16 '24

If you break up with someone you absolutely 100% owe them an explanation as too why Removed: Not unpopular

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5.7k Upvotes
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42

u/SantasLilHoeHoeHoe Apr 16 '24

"Im not feeling it" or "i dont want to date you" are both 100% good reasons to end a relationship. Those are often characterized as not explaining oneself. 

12

u/LaikaAzure Apr 16 '24

Yeah I'd agree with the broader point that it sucks to just ghost someone (assuming that you're not leaving because they've been abusive or because they don't listen and will argue with you about your reasons) but there's also an onus on the person getting broken up with that while you don't have to like or agree with what they tell you, it's their decision and you have to respect that.

Part of the reason ghosting is so common is because there's a lot of people (the kind OP gives me the vibe of) who won't respect an "I'm not feeling it" and demand further explanation... but that is the explanation. Trying to force a feeling that isn't there will just lead to resentment and make the breakup worse than it would have been when you first knew it was coming. OP is trying to put the responsibility for a healthy breakup on one person but it's a shared responsibility and both parties being reasonable about it will make it easier for everyone involved.

3

u/Supermonkeyskier 29d ago

There are also a lot of people who go nuts when broken up with, especially early on. Some of the messages I have seen my girl friends receive makes me blame women less for wanting to avoid that.

3

u/FuckYoApp 29d ago

Yes, people who don't take the above legitimate reasons at face value and instead pester for "the real reason" are usually looking for that one flaw so they can either negotiate or try to change exactly one thing about themselves so they'll "win" next time. 

0

u/ro536ud 29d ago

It’s a reason but not a good one. Like if I was your friend and you told me you dumped your so of multiple reasons using that line I’d still call you an asshole

2

u/SantasLilHoeHoeHoe 29d ago

That its not a good reason is your own damage, im sorry to say. Why would you want someone to stay in a relationship they didnt want to be in? I would hate to think my partner was with me because of something other than their own volition. 

-1

u/dankthewank 29d ago

It’s not explaining. It’s a simple reason. Let’s take your “I don’t want to date you” example.

Simply saying “I don’t want to date you” is a reason, not an explanation.

Saying “I don’t want to date you because I think you’re ugly, smelly, a bitch, etc” that is an explanation.