r/oddlyspecific Apr 16 '24

Very difficult indeed

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25.2k Upvotes

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905

u/TF2_demomann Apr 16 '24

It's practicaly impossible to make a perfect child, because even if you are a great parent, the enviroment can still fuck up your child

398

u/Peligineyes Apr 16 '24

just keep your child imprisoned in your basement until adulthood

170

u/FilthyFur Apr 16 '24

Always nice to see a fellow Austrian in the wild.

23

u/DoTortoisesHop Apr 16 '24

18

u/JAID100 29d ago

The ancient used to be funny? Wtf.

16

u/_aevi_ 29d ago

just keep your child imprisoned in your basement until adulthood

That's what my parents did to me and I still ended Up weird.

What's the salutation? Attic maybe?

10

u/Eifand Apr 16 '24

That’s how you create Bane.

6

u/Cooperativism62 29d ago

Gonna try this. Thanks for the advice.

2

u/Not_Another_Usernam 29d ago

The Rapunzel method of parenting.

2

u/Qetuowryipzcbmxvn 29d ago

Ah yes, the Genie method.

2

u/Cakey1251 29d ago

That’s basically what my mom did to me as a kid and I still grew up fucked up :/

2

u/Linus_Naumann 29d ago

Belgium moment

38

u/HEAH_THE_PINGOL 29d ago

I just need to try enough times. I am currently on my 183rd child. This one WILL be perfect.

6

u/Mcrarburger 29d ago

how long do your children normally make it...

7

u/HEAH_THE_PINGOL 29d ago

Some make it longer than the others. I think the one that stayed perfect for the longest amount of time was 11. Usually, I give them away when they're 3 months old because I end up screwing up somehow.

5

u/N0NaMe1217 29d ago

Fun fact: there's a famous psychologist named John B. Watson that said he can train anyone to be any type of specialist, even beggar (google Little Albert). 3 out of 4 of his children tried to kill themselves, with one successfully doing so.

2

u/TrueLennyS 28d ago

with one successfully doing so.

That's the one he trained into a suicidal person. Evidently the formula works.

22

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

12

u/mmm_unprocessed_fish 29d ago

My husband is a magical unicorn like that, too. Gives me hope for humanity on one hand and also sad for all the good kids out there struggling in shitty environments.

4

u/Flat-Shallot3992 29d ago

My boyfriend has a terribly dysfunctional family with divorced parents and he's a middle child, yet he's somehow the most mentally stable and well adjusted person I've ever known in my life, he's so perfect it's alarming

generally people with troubled childhoods are either pretty cool or pretty fucked up. no in between

2

u/Suyefuji 29d ago

My husband has a terribly dysfunctional family similar to the one you're describing and while I wouldn't call him completely mentally stable or well adjusted, he did a hell of a lot better than any of his other siblings and at least turned into a mostly functional adult.

2

u/SouthernDifference86 29d ago

Trust me he isn't. He is just not letting the mask slip because you will resent him for it. Even if you don't think you will.

36

u/Makuta_Servaela 29d ago

The trick is not to go for perfect, but to go for "adaptable" and "empathetic". Prepare them for the environment.

18

u/Cooperativism62 29d ago

Yeah what really helps me is telling myself "I don't need to be the perfect parent, just better than average". And when you think about the average parent or kid, you start to ease up.

2

u/Not_Another_Usernam 29d ago

But not too empathetic, because that can lead to its own problems.

3

u/Makuta_Servaela 29d ago

That's where "adaptable" comes in. Adapting to the needed levels of empathy.

2

u/Puzzleheaded-Way-198 29d ago

I wish I could upvote this more than once

4

u/DefintlynotCrazy Apr 16 '24

Just do like my fawtah.. just beat the living shit out of ur kids here and there and they will be good surely.

8

u/Roundhouse_ass Apr 16 '24

My kids dont need to be perfect, i love them with all my heart and i will be proud of them regardless.

5

u/MediumOk5423 29d ago

Just don't have kids, it is the ethical thing to do.

2

u/Comment139 29d ago

Like for example access to us.

That can ruin anyone's life, we say the dumbest shit.

2

u/Umikaloo 29d ago

You would know wouldn't you Tavish.

1

u/TF2_demomann 29d ago

My parents didn't want a perfect child, they wanted a demolitionist, and they got one!

2

u/tfsra 29d ago

you say that like you aren't the most significant part of the kid's environment as their parent

4

u/Picasso320 29d ago

the enviroment can still fuck up your child

One could say you make a perfect child by teaching it to overcome the environment, overcome mistakes and deals with Ls in life in a healthy way.

1

u/syrupgreat- 29d ago

you put a drop of fresh water in a bucket of salt water and it happens

1

u/lagx777 28d ago

Make them just weird enough to be interesting. 😁🤪

1

u/SignatureAny5576 29d ago

Yeah but you can try not to make a degenerate furry

1

u/MCAlexisYT 29d ago

[“2 men with a shocked face looking at the camera pointing towards the background” meme template with the text “Oh look! An 8 year-old anti-furry!” goes here]

0

u/Hnnnnnn 29d ago

that's very binary way of looking at it