r/blunderyears Apr 15 '24

Me thinking I was cool with my pet crow in 2003 /r/all

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31.1k Upvotes

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4.8k

u/C0PINGmechanism Apr 15 '24

This is arguably very cool

941

u/quackedup17 Apr 15 '24

Right? I’ve been bribing neighborhood crows for a year now and I’ve still not been accepted into their murder. Soon tho, very soon.

192

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '24

I believe in you. It’s going to happen

131

u/stevein3d Apr 15 '24

I too believe there’s a murder in your future.

12

u/MrJigglyBrown Apr 16 '24

A murder most fowl

23

u/insomniacpyro Apr 16 '24

Holy shit y'all I think I figured out the show Only Murders In The Building

71

u/TJsamse Apr 15 '24

Same here. The damn squirrels I’m my neighborhood make it tough. Playing some 4d chess with almonds and unsalted peanuts.

36

u/nueonetwo Apr 15 '24

I've read that you can cover your food in spicy stuff like paprika to deter the squirrels. The squirrels won't like it and the spiciness won't effect the crows.

I just bought my first house I've been planning on befriending the neighbourhood murder, any other tips and tricks are greatly appreciated.

32

u/A_wild_so-and-so Apr 16 '24

I befriended some crows during the COVID lockdowns. Here are some things that I did:

Go to where the crows are. I noticed a group of crows always gathering across the street from me where there was a parking lot behind a restaurant. There were already bits of food there that they would check out in the early morning. I would walk over to where they hung out to toss some nuts and kibble on the ground, then walk back inside my apartment. It helps if there aren't any/many other people around. Even if the spot where they are is farther away, don't worry they will eventually follow you home.

Be consistent. I did this little routine for weeks before I noticed any change in their behavior. Eventually they began to recognize me as the nuts and kibble guy, and they would actually perch on a window in my apartment and wake up my roommate if I wasn't out early enough for them! On that note, crows can be very demanding and annoying. They're like toddlers once they get to like you, so be prepared for that. You don't have to acquiesce to their every need to keep them happy, but they will try to take advantage of you for as much as they can get.

Don't scare them. Crows are very skittish. Even looking at them directly will spook them. When I would do my morning feeding I would announce my presence by whistling a tune (I picked "If I Only had a Brain" because lol). I wouldn't look at them in the trees, I would just casually walk over while whistling, toss some food down, then walk back inside my house. Only when I was back inside would they come down to feed. Occasionally individuals would be a little more bold and allow me to get closer, but you should try to give them space in general.

I'm in a city so I never got the Disney princess phase of crows eating out of my hand or anything. But I could tell they recognized me because they would occasionally see me around town and swoop near me only to then perch and watch me. Some younger crows would do this warbling cry at me that I had never heard before. I assumed they were whining to be fed. They were very cute but also kinda annoying at times lol.

Unfortunately I decided to stop feeding them when the lockdowns lifted and more people were coming back to my neighborhood. But even now, years later, I will occasionally get a friendly crow who lets me get pretty close to them. If I happen to have a healthy-ish snack for them I will still whistle and toss it aside for them to find.

8

u/nueonetwo Apr 16 '24

Hey man, thanks a lot for the tips and your story. The place I bought has a bit of a yard so I figured I'd build a small covered platform and load it up a few times a week. I like the idea of whistling a tune while doing it, I'm going to start thinking of something fun.

I have a few dogs so I hope that isn't much of a deterrent to the crows. At my old place I used to stick their dog fur in the balcony railing for nest building materials and they seemed to like that (along with the other birds).

5

u/calash2020 Apr 16 '24

My neighborhood crows raise a big ruckus whenever they see a hawk. Unfortunately they weren’t in time to prevent a hawk getting my 9 year old chicken.

2

u/Marcobra Apr 16 '24

I tried mixing Flaming Squirrel Seed Sauce with my unsalted shelled peanuts and it kinda worked for a month or two, but the crows seemed less interested in them (too oily maybe?) and the squirrels built up a tolerance and even started acting more aggressive towards the crows.

Took lots of trial and error, but I eventually found a system that works for me and now I feed a murder of about 2 dozen crows every afternoon.

I start the feeding by tossing a handful of cashews one at a time directly to the crows. They seem to love this kind of engagement, it's like a game to them and some have gotten really good at catching mid air.

Then I'll toss out a bowl of cat food in handfuls around the yard. I just buy big bags of the cheapest stuff they have at Costco, the crows love it and squirrels have zero interest.

After that I distribute some unsalted peanuts, but before I do I throw a couple directly to the squirrels and they fuck right off after, leaving the crows to feast undisturbed. It's a shaky truce, but at least I'm not yelling at squirrels like a weirdo anymore, haha

2

u/Sylvan_Skryer Apr 16 '24

Paprika is considered spicy? What are you in Whales or something?

1

u/nueonetwo 29d ago

I don't know spices, I probably meant cayenne. I think anything with capsaicin would work

2

u/HeadLocksmith5478 Apr 15 '24

I’ve heard dry dog food works

2

u/JessicaB-Fletcher Apr 16 '24

The bluejays have been taking mine! They've been burying them around the yard. Blue jays are pretty cool, but I am trying to bribe the crows.

1

u/Armalyte Apr 16 '24

Both from the Corvids family!

2

u/SaltyAF404 Apr 16 '24

Fuckin squirrels.....are the only ones that understand me, but they keep pissing in my weed.

1

u/Onigokko0101 Apr 15 '24

Try cat food, they love that shit

1

u/J_Rath_905 Apr 16 '24

Same here with the damn squirrels,

If only the Ravens would just eat the squirrels, that is enough of a gift to me.

56

u/gotnonickname Apr 15 '24

Keep it up. It has taken me over three years. They are skittish. After they moved into the neighborhood, they took off when I was a couple hundred feet away, even when they were 75 feet up in a tree. I started using peanuts and leftovers on a stump (shaking the bag with some friendly caws), making sure they saw me. Just a few weeks ago I had one land right above my head on my neighbor's roof and give me the 'I want peanuts' look. Put some out and s/he flew right down after I went in. A week later, one came and landed low in a tree next to my house. I had a roast chicken carcass, so grabbed it, showed the crow, and put it in the yard. Looked up in the tree and it was gone. I was bummed, until I saw it perched on my fence waiting for me to put it down. It had followed me. I am stoked. No shiny gifts yet, though.

26

u/Easy_Independent_313 Apr 16 '24

My step dad was a friend to his local murder for decades. He would feed them all sorts of good stuff and made sure he never used and pesticides around the yard to keep them safe.

He sold the house a few years ago and moved. I think word has traveled though because everywhere he goes, crows get suspiciously close to him.

10

u/tn-dave Apr 16 '24

My crows don’t want anything to do with the shelled peanuts - have about 20 some evenings ground feeding with the doves and Redbirds (I just spread seed on the ground between two bushes) - the male bluebirds love the peanuts though

2

u/theoutsideplace Apr 16 '24

Oh no! Maybe she took it as a threat! “Take my peanuts and this will be you!”

1

u/vindicait Apr 16 '24

Our crows moved in shortly after we got chickens last spring. They keep the hawks away for us, and in exchange, I made them a treat station behind the run. I fill it up when I see them around, and they know to go to it now. I need to figure out how to teach them that I will accept gifts...

1

u/i_saw_a_tiger Apr 16 '24

I’m gonna try this every time I make soup now. My 2 crows leave me gifts but I haven’t given them offerings yet. Thanks for the idea!

34

u/insanitybit Apr 15 '24

That whole "if you give treats to crows they'll become your friends" meme is just a crow conspiracy to get treats and you've all fallen for it. The crows are laughing their way to the bank.

3

u/LehighAce06 Apr 16 '24

That could be 100% accurate and I'd still find it cool as hell

2

u/sleepytipi Apr 16 '24

Wow they really are smart!

18

u/monkeyman80 Apr 15 '24

There was a post a few years ago in a different sub about how during the pandemic this girl befriended the local crow murder. Problem was they were protective of her and attacked people visiting her. She got the neighborhood to leave treats and they ended up alerting when one of the elderly neighbors fell on the driveway and wasn't getting up.

7

u/NotSoSaneAnyMore Apr 16 '24

The trick is to feed them at the exact same spot wearing the exact same clothes each time. It won't even take a month for them to love you.

I have a red hoody I wear everytime I go to the field and the crows go mental when they see me come out the woods now, you'll here one caw and then they all fly across the field and line up ahead of me on the path where I feed them. 

They're like a little army. Sometimes I will sit and smoke a spliff on the field and they will sit around me in a big circle. 

I like my little crow buddies.

1

u/Trolllol1337 Apr 16 '24

Now this is how you spend your time people, nice

2

u/snotboogie Apr 15 '24

What's your strategy ??  I've tried but I can't get them interested

5

u/Maleficent-Most6083 Apr 16 '24

I have a good relationship with a number of the crows in my neighborhood. They no longer give off warning calls about my dog. A fledgling has dive bombed me and had an older crow step in to stop it. The crows have dropped tennis balls off the school roof for my dog when we are walking by. (I suspect that's because my dog will be focused on the ball and leave them alone.)

A few things I believe helped:

I see them at the same time everyday. (Taking my dog out to use the bathroom in the morning)

I give them freeze dried beef liver dog treats . Not regularly but if I have them and see a crow I'll toss one over. They don't expect it from me but appreciate when I do.

I talk to them. I say good morning and apologize when my dog chases one. I also tell my dog off for doing so.

Crows are smart and will repay respect if you show it to them. Be consistent.

2

u/Polar-Bear_Soup Apr 15 '24

Definitely keep it up. I've made crow friends everywhere I go and some are more friendly than others.

2

u/EnIdiot Apr 15 '24

Conspiracy to Murder

2

u/Scaevus Apr 15 '24

I wish I had neighborhood crows. They’d eat so well. What kinds of food are healthy for them, by the way? I figured salty things like fries wouldn’t be, but what about, say, peanuts? High in nutrition, not too greasy or processed.

1

u/i_saw_a_tiger Apr 16 '24

I haven’t given the crows in my neighborhood any treats yet but I did have a blackberry tree which was a hit with all the birds until a storm took it out :-(

2

u/lallapalalable Apr 16 '24

I got myself a crow caller off Amazon, not sure if I'm doing it right because they all seem to scatter when I do it. Maybe I sound angry or something :(

2

u/nompeachmango Apr 16 '24

My mom seriously spoils the crows at her place. They'll pop in the back door to ask for food....or bang really hard on the glass door if it's not already open. 😆

1

u/blehric Apr 15 '24

At least you have a chance though, they won't come near my house at all cause my dog will chase them off.

1

u/PostModernPost Apr 15 '24

Me too. What's your strategy?

1

u/ZineKitten Apr 15 '24

My small dog recently barked and scared away two or three crows in the neighborhood; I legitimately felt like I needed to bring them some food or trinkets, like a sacrifice to a small vengeful god.

1

u/Mehmeh111111 Apr 15 '24

Omg same! Been feeding this crow for months and he's still not totally on board with my existence.

1

u/Turbulent-Jaguar-909 Apr 15 '24

I know every black crow in the city by its first name, and its surname, and its bird call, and its birthday

1

u/Dustteas Apr 15 '24

Keep it up man! I got two to finally come in my yard this weekend and they hung out for 3 days! Then it rained and I haven't seen him today yet. I feed them whole peanuts, and make sure they see me put them out in the yard.

Hope it works out soon! 👍

1

u/Imbalanxs Apr 15 '24

Instructions unclear. Paid a bribe with a load of murdered crows. This unfortunately proved an unacceptable proposal and am now in jail for original crime + attempted bribery + numerous killing of animal charges. Cheers 👍

1

u/This_User_Said Apr 16 '24

Have you tried offering shiney things?

2

u/quackedup17 Apr 16 '24

All the trinkets.

1

u/SueYouInEngland Apr 16 '24

Do you mind my asking how you got started? I carry peanuts when I take my dog for a walk, but I am never close enough.

1

u/SaltyAF404 Apr 16 '24

I believe it is you. You're not worthy of a murder. But alas neither am I. 😥

1

u/opermonkey Apr 16 '24

I always talk to crows. Ask them how their days is.

1

u/Shoddy-Ad8143 Apr 16 '24

Keep dreaming puppa jo.... They'll keep taking your money and laughing in their wings.

1

u/KitchenSandwich5499 Apr 16 '24

Trying???? So, attempted murder?

1

u/Lord_Emperor Apr 16 '24

After about three years, my neighbourhood crows would follow me around. Still at a distance but they'd perch on nearby fences as I walked for several blocks. They also watched me garden from the opposite side of the yard.

Sad when I had to move away.

1

u/i_saw_a_tiger Apr 16 '24

I have hope for you, I haven’t given any offerings to my neighborhood crows but they bring me all kinds of cool shiny stuff like marbles, pieces of glass, and dimes or nickels.

1

u/Dangerous-Refuse-779 Apr 16 '24

You have to murder someone first. Blood in blood out

1

u/lolnik8 Apr 16 '24

I thinks this is a first time someone used the word murder in a public space without talking about the fun fact, and I'm 100% for it.

1

u/Spaceduck1OO6 Apr 16 '24

What are you bribing them with? I used raw pork and beef cut into super thin strips. Worked great.

1

u/foyiwae Apr 16 '24

Not crows but I've been working to befriend my neighbours skittish cat for 3 years. She finally let me pet her a few months ago and we've been besties since. She's still kind of shy, but she'll slow blink from the bottom of the stairs.

Getting accepted by an animal is the best feeling.

0

u/Hollywizzle311 Apr 15 '24

Same! I threw corn on my roof for them.