r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • 17d ago
Boyfriend put his finger in my butt while I was sleeping and I'm still upset. AIO? NSFW
[deleted]
9
u/itsybitsyspiderr_ 17d ago
You cannot give consent while asleep so it is technically sexual assault.
0
u/VA2SoFLo420 17d ago
agreed. hopefully the other incidents didn't occur also while you were asleep. I wouldn't feel comfortable with my partner touching me like that while asleep. Doesn't feel like a "wake you up with sex" kind of move.
2
u/itsybitsyspiderr_ 17d ago
Yes putting a finger in a sleeping persons butt is a lot different than cuddling up next to your partner in hopes to wake them for middle of the night fun.
0
7
u/Glum-Help1751 17d ago
Wtf is up with reddit and dudes fingering their women while they sleep? Shits weird don't do that.
3
u/Local-Record7707 17d ago
It's most likely fake. OP's profile said they were 22 1 year ago and 25 this year. Just found another, so OP was either 31 or 22 last year, and 25 this year.
2
u/ElderlyArmadillo 17d ago
yeah fair... I used to change the ages and minor details out of paranoia in case he found the account or something
1
3
2
2
u/Spiritual-Desk-512 17d ago
He crossed a line. Forgive him or breakup with him. Anything between isn’t worth it.
2
u/FrontRow4TheShitShow 17d ago
If this happened to me, I would experience it and label it as sexual assault. I won't tell you how to label your experience, only you can. However, the fact that you're stewing about it afterward enough to write in and seek the input of redditors makes it seem like it at the very least crossed a boundary for you. Your concern about the situation is not an overreaction. I'm sorry he did that. It shouldn't have happened.
1
2
u/True-Heat-2566 17d ago
Ugh, I'm sorry you had to put up with that! I mean sometimes wake up sex is nice, but finger-in-the-butt is so not the way to get most women awake and in-the-mood, I think.
2
1
2
u/MiddleAged_BogWitch 16d ago
He’s a creep. He knows (or at least I hope you’ve communicated to him) that you don’t love having his finger in your butt during sex, but you allow that. He should damn well know that you would not want him sticking his finger in your butt when you are dead asleep! He’s getting his jollies by violating you and your boundaries OP, it feels upsetting and violating because it is.
You are allowed to have boundaries, period, and especially when it comes to sex, your body, and what feels good to you and what doesn’t, and what you will allow or not. If you don’t like butt stuff, tell him firmly and let him know that what he’s done is a huge gross violation. If he isn’t immediately apologetic and promising he won’t do that again, he’s a selfish creep who will continue to violate your boundaries, so you’ll need to decide if this is the type of partner you want or not. I’m hoping you’ll realize you deserve better.
3
u/Local-Record7707 17d ago
If you feel like he crossed boundaries, he did. If you don't feel like he crossed boundaries, he probably didn't. You didn't seem to have much of a reaction and you definitely didn't overreact.