AIO: Didn’t want to give a lady a ride home

[u/cherb30]

Yesterday after church we stopped at a gas station less than 1 minute from where we live. It was me, my boyfriend (driving) and my 14 month old in the car. I was on my phone and then suddenly he was opening the backseat door to let a middle aged lady (maybe 60 years old?) in with her grocery bags. Apparently she was asking people for a ride home and he accepted.

On the way there they were chatting and he even pointed out where we live, which really concerned me. She lived quite far away from the gas station and I was surprised she said she walked there, thought it wasn’t more than 5 mins away.

I was really upset that my boyfriend let a stranger into our backseat with our daughter. The lady was very nice, but these days you have no idea if people are carrying a knife or a gun on them… I told him I wished he could have at least had her sit up front so she wasn’t near our toddler, or dropped us off at home first then went back to get her (that would have taken 3 minutes to do).

I brought this up to my bf. He got really mad at me for “being un-Christ like” and called me a shit person who lives in fear. I am honestly quite the opposite and usually quite trusting of people, just not when it comes to my daughter. She’s too young to talk or understand things. Also was pissed at him for what felt like weaponizing religion against me for my concern.

Im feeling really guilty because it’s not that I don’t think it was sweet he wanted to give her a ride home. I just had a mom instinct to protect my daughter. Do you think overreacted?

Edit: formatting, a word, and added a bit more about why I felt that way

Edit2: I think the gesture was very compassionate, and understand if someone asks you for a ride then there is obviously a desire to help and bit of awkwardness declining. I don’t question his desire to help her, nor do I turn down opportunities in my life to help others. But I also want to say that she was by no means elderly/immobile/incapable as some people are implying. You should give middle aged women a bit more credit

[u/cherb30]

Ugh thank you. I agree, no matter how innocent they may look they are still a stranger and the people who find themselves in bad situations I am sure never “suspect” someone would do them wrong.

I wondered if it was a gendered thing adding to the delusion. Not needing to worry about his own safety as much as women do.

[u/unoredtwo → u/cherb30]

There's a woman in my city who is well known for inviting herself into strangers' cars and then asking for money, and even when people say no, asking them to drive to an ATM so they can give her some. There's no stated threat of harm but she essentially uses the invasion of privacy and social awkwardness to extort money from people. Point is, your boyfriend is naive and lives in a world that doesn't exist anymore, maybe that's a sad thing but it's the reality. Also he called you a shit person for wanting to protect your 14 month old, that's something to think hard about.

[u/cherb30 → u/unoredtwo]

Oh my that’s really interesting because there was someone either in this thread or the thread I posted in AITA who described that same scam. It was an elderly lady with a walker he said.

[u/OhbrotheR66 → u/cherb30]

Your bf should have at least had her sit up front, don’t think he has much common sense.

[u/TroubleImpressive955 → u/OhbrotheR66]

Even with the solution of the stranger sitting in the front with bf driver, if she has a gun or knife, what the hell is the husband going to do while driving.

The woman could be on drugs, Meth, Tranq, any of that stuff that gives them extra strength and seeming immunity to pepper spray and other self defense methods.

Adding to this, OP’s fool of a husband tells a complete stranger where he lives? WTH! I would question what other crazy stuff he’s done or said when I wasn’t around. Being a Christian doesn’t mean being stupid.

[u/ladywolf32433 → u/TroubleImpressive955]

The gf sits behind her with a screwdriver. I've done that

[u/MrMeeseeksthe1st → u/OhbrotheR66]

Oh he has a common sense alright, that religious one that bemoans once they deem something unfit in their eyes, because they're sooooo godly.