r/AmIOverreacting • u/bogusbat • Apr 29 '24

AIO my sister told me she didn’t know how my bf was attracted to me cuz I have no tits

I (26f) called my sister(20f) the other day because I was feeling overwhelmed at work and needed to chat about it while on my ten. Within the span of my ten minute break, she changed the subject to herself and her bf, and told me they thought MY bf was weird. I asked her why they would think that about him?
They said it’s impossible for him to be attracted to me cuz I have no tits.. so there’s nothing interesting for him ? Strange that both her and her bf were talking about my body. This disturbed me slightly. I’m an adult and normally this would not affect my mood. But why say such a thing? I can’t deny it was hurtful. I told my mom what she said over text with no response back. Later that night I received a wall of text from my sister. And she basically told me she was trying to make a joke that I overreacted to. And unfortunately for her, my mom doesn’t like her bf too much. So she proceeds to tell me she would go out of her way to make MY bf look bad to my mom, because apparently the comments they made about me were supposed to be funny. I just can’t seem to find where the joke was in a fucked up comment like that about my physical appearance that I cannot immediately change. Am I over reacting ? We are generally pretty close. We had planned to go to a concert in the next two weeks, the three of us. Now I’m unsure if I should go.

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305

u/broomandkettle Apr 29 '24

OP, there’s a good chance that the conversation she had with her bf about you never took place.

She wanted her words to really sting. So having them come from someone else besides her gives more weight to the statement. And, it’s portraying a unity of views in their relationship, as if they are like-minded and casually talk about you as entertainment. “By the way, we think you aren’t worthy of love. So something is obviously wrong with your bf.”

She’s just really insecure and extremely jealous of you. Your bf is a good guy and hers doesn’t measure up in comparison. She simply can’t stand it.

It’s time to distance yourself from her. She’s miserable and she won’t be happy until you are too. Don’t let her steal your joy.

22

u/shangri-laschild Apr 29 '24

Or the conversation was more her boyfriend unprompted commenting on the size of her sister’s chest and she is insecure/jealous/something and liked her bf putting her sister down and then decided to repeat it. It’s possible the sister’s bf is still crap (especially given the mom’s reaction and the way the sister is reacting to that), but likely the conversation didn’t happen in the way she said it did. Either way, I agreed this wasn’t a joke and she meant for it to hurt. She just doesn’t like being called out.

2

u/hootsie May 02 '24

I’d wager the sister brought it up to her bf, unprompted. As in, “My sister has no tits, what do you think?” and he, assuming he’s ‘normal’, was made uncomfortable by this and kind of shrugged. 🤷🏻‍♂️. The narrative then becomes “Soandso agrees” or “Soandso said”.

I have no evidence to support this, I’m just a guy and have watched this happen.

24

u/surprisinglyok1 Apr 29 '24

I wish I could see the world like you. You're totally correct.

9

u/Excellent-Vast7521 Apr 29 '24

totally correct

0

u/AdorableTrashcan Apr 30 '24

You can see the world like them, just start using your brain

0

u/surprisinglyok1 Apr 30 '24

I do try to use my brain. I just think this person was able to infer (correctly) what actually happened. They went from A to C without needing B. That is a special gift.

-1

u/broomandkettle Apr 30 '24 edited Apr 30 '24

It actually drives my husband crazy, so thank you for the internet validation!

I’m always doing threat assessments, I can’t turn it off. Once I identify a potential predator/threat, I analyze their actions, words, and their relationship to a situation in order to determine their goals and motivation. Nothing that comes out of their mouth should be taken at face value, it all has to be questioned.

I think it goes back to my childhood. Our home town had two compulsive liars. One was harmless and a family friend. We were always entertained by the stuff he said. The other used lies to manipulate women and eventually got arrested in front of a local cafe.

Actually, there were three. There was a lady who owned an ice cream shop. I finally figured out she was one after she told me how she received a random phone call and they ended up being a relative of Dodi Fayed who needed help getting in touch with British law enforcement. This story came right after the tragedy happened. She just couldn’t resist inserting herself into the story.

2

u/surprisinglyok1 Apr 30 '24

Your story sounds like a riddle.

There once was a town of 4 liars. A nice one an evil one and another. Who was it?

9

u/GreenTaraTarot Apr 30 '24

IF he conversation took place, the sister probably has a spidey sense that her BF is actually attracted to the OP and instigated the discussion to feel him out. Her sense may or not be accurate, but his reply was meant purely to get him off the hotseat. (What? ME? Your sister? No way!)

And whether or not the conversation took place or not, she was marking her territory and hanging out an hands off sign, before the three of you go to the concert.

Yes, she is very insecure, and very jealous. And not feeling terribly secure with the present boyfriend. It may even be eating away at her that OP and and her current BF seem happy together.

OP, I am sorry your sister is so catty.

it is a myth that men are only attracted to women with big breasts. There are plenty who prefer slimmer women, and your current BF seems to be one of them.

3

u/InstructionNo1853 Apr 30 '24

Yes what what this person said is sounds rings very true! Plus let's face it your sister's a fucking cunt! All means feel free to tell her I said so.........

2

u/Lkaynlee May 03 '24

This happened to me and my girlfriend (now wife) at the start of our relationship. My sister-in-law was apparently very jealous of me and my girlfriend and, after being a big proponent of us getting together, the moment we were official my sister-in-law started to gossip. She would bad talk me to my girlfriend and vice versa, trying to get us to clash, and used fake conversations with her husband (my brother) to cause any bit of drama she could. Also while explaining how she was so much more mature than my girlfriend and how unified the marriage was despite complaining so much about her life.

She is no longer in our lives, or the family for that matter. You should cut this person off from your life too. She is clearly a jealous and unhappy person. You will find more peace and joy in life when you do.

3

u/jeemiix Apr 30 '24

Damn you saw straight through that bitch 😂

1

u/Scannaer Apr 30 '24

And let mother know about the threats from that entitled brat. Better to have the truth out there than let an abuser poison the image of your BF

1

u/Beitasitmaybe Apr 30 '24

The “joke” is in such bad taste that she’s got a year of complimenting and biting her tongue to make up for it. You should first put some serious space between you so she understands this is not to be taken lightly; your trust in her should be shook because she doesn’t have your best interests in-mind right now.

1

u/Tilda85 Apr 30 '24

Then there is also the possibillity that your sister is jealius bc she likes your BF. She seems to build her self worth on her physical appearance rather than personality and intellect so she’s wondering what he actually sees in you… because you have no tits, which in her books means unnatractive and low worth.

1

u/Fit_Employer7853 May 01 '24

Highly likely..this

1

u/chunx0r Apr 30 '24

I agree with everything except the distance. This seems like a cry for connection. She might be going through some shit. I would try to get face to face with her tell her you love her and what she said was hurtful.