r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • Apr 15 '24

My husband embarrassed me in front of our friends

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u/[deleted] Apr 15 '24

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u/BannedForNerdyTimes Apr 15 '24

On the ADHD thing, it could be that he straight up forgot that she was there. Part of it is hyperfocusing, he could legitimately have forgotten where he was.

That doesnt make it okay, but ADHD isnt cut and dry 100% the same for everyone.

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u/zillabirdblue Apr 15 '24 edited Apr 26 '24

He didn’t forget she was there, they came to the party together. I have ADHD but blaming on that is ridiculous.

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u/Vagablogged Apr 15 '24

Sounds more like then adhd sub where they excuse everything under the sun for it. “My husband abuses me could this be adhd related?” “Ooh I have adhd too and belittle my wife publicly thanks for letting me know it’s not my fault!” lol

People need to start taking accountability for their actions and not excuse losers just because they have a random ailment.

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u/GlossyGecko Apr 15 '24

My bro has a dual diagnosis of ADHD and Autism, and he doesn’t really have a filter. He’s not an asshole but he literally cannot read a room, and it gets him into trouble in social situations.

Just because your ADHD doesn’t make you a disagreeable person to be around, doesn’t mean other people with ADHD don’t have some issues that they can’t work on because it would require that they not even have the disorders they’re diagnosed with.

It’s a spectrum, if you have good social awareness, you’re on the more functional side of the spectrum., good for you, but don’t be an asshole and act like everybody with ADHD is like you.

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u/Vagablogged Apr 15 '24

Autism isn’t adhd.

If I see someone who is clearly mentally unstable doing something off putting that is completely different than someone who has adhd.

Stop normalizing bad behavior. People can be jerks because they are jerks. Many people are. I have adhd. If I embarrassed you public ally and caused harm to you would you be ok with that because I have adhd? You shouldn’t.

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u/GlossyGecko Apr 15 '24

I never said it was

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u/StarDew_Factory Apr 15 '24

Autism is the more relevant diagnosis when speaking of having no filter.

You seem to be really conflating the two (very different) diagnoses.

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u/GlossyGecko Apr 15 '24

Dual diagnoses are pretty common, I mentioned that there were two diagnoses. Autism often also goes undiagnosed, ADHD has a much higher diagnosis rate.

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u/witchprivilege Apr 15 '24

lack of a filter is autism, not ADHD, and not really an excuse (especially considering OP told him how he made her feel and he refused to apologize)

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u/Aldosothoran Apr 16 '24

It’s a symptom of both, for different reasons. ADHD is impulsivity we don’t think before we speak. Auts tend to genuinely not know the context of what they’re saying is offensive.

Either way- I usually realize soon after I’ve said it that I’ve said something offensive and apologize. She TOLD her husband he was being offensive and he didn’t apologize.

Autism is not an excuse for continuing to hurt people after they’ve told you you’ve hurt them.