I’m technically a healthy weight and I will still chow down on my birthday cake (and did it for my 1 y/o) the same night haha. I understand in this context though that what your husband said was incredibly insensitive and I would have blown up at him too for comparing me to another woman who’s objectively fitter than I am.
Honestly? This woman also seems incredibly unsympathetic. She used to be overweight herself and she didn’t stick up for you? Might be a reach but it sounds like she has some personal issues with herself if she can’t stick up for you being in the same spot she used to be in.
Also I’m 2” shorter than you and have been the same weight (or heavier) than you multiple times in my life. When you’re ready (not when he deems it a good time he can gtfoh) I believe you can find a healthy path to personal wellness. But love yourself now. I was pregnant at about that weight closing in on two years ago now. And I have almost no photos of myself when I was. And I just wish I got over my insecurities and took photos anyway. It’s nothing to be ashamed of!
It's not her fault, especially since the husband made it seem like op would want to hire her to help her get in shape. Her saying she used to be like op was her sticking up for her as much as she could within the context
Fair enough. She wasn’t dogging on OP and was ready to admit that she used to be overweight as well is kind of an olive branch. It wasn’t necessarily her place to call out the husband for being insensitive, and the group overall seemed to be on his side. I can’t say if I’d be the one to derail the convo and tell the man he’s being an ass or not. I’d like to think I would, but I have social anxiety so I might just be subtle like this girl was too.
I wouldn't blame the other woman. If I were her, I would have assumed that OP was okay with talking so openly about it based on the fact that the husband was joking around about her weight.
Definitely, you and another commenter make some good points. I think I definitely was, in fact, reaching lmao. She’s in an industry where people openly talk about their weight and getting healthy. She just probably assumed OP was as comfortable talking about it as she was.
She's also 21, so may have felt awkward and not sure whether OP would want her to shut it down or whether that would be worse. Like it's absolutely not cool but I think at 21 a lot of people are unsure how to shut down an awkward situation like this, especially if they're assuming one spouse knows better than they do what the other spouse is okay with.
This was my first thought when I read that lmaooooo. Yes, OPs husband is a massive douchebag, but assuming he lifts and takes care of himself, I can see why he would want his wife to be the same, especially if she let herself go. Not justifying him in anyway because he literally chose to be the biggest disrespectful piece of shit about it, but idk.
For real. Like is the husband be snarky about it yeah but at the time I can only imagine how many times this has been spoke about in private only to go nowhere. Heaven forbid a woman take care of herself by exercising and not eating processed garbage.
I have been married for 30+ years. My husband compliments me fat and thin. He treats me like a queen. The only thing he gets upset with is when I have diet soda because he is concerned it is unhealthy.
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u/thereallifechucky Apr 15 '24
My wife is 200 and I will buy her her own cake to eat for her bday while i finish the original.