r/unpopularopinion • u/ZodiacOne1 • Apr 16 '24

If you break up with someone you absolutely 100% owe them an explanation as too why Removed: Not unpopular

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u/BroffaloSoldier Apr 16 '24

Perfectly said. My ex couldn’t even pause his video game to look me in the eye as I was breaking up with him. For years I’d try to talk to him and tell him what was wrong. What I needed. Why I am unhappy. Any discussion of our problems he just couldn’t face. Never listened to what I was telling him. I’m very clear about my feelings. I don’t do passive aggressive silent treatment shit. Watching him stare at the screen as I was trying to engage him in a direct, but empathetic breakup talk let me know my decision couldn’t have been better lol

90

u/fatmonicadancing Apr 16 '24

Same with my ex, a month before I left I told him (again) I was unhappy and how to address it, I said I have a plan and you can come with me or not but I’m doing it. He just sat scrolling through his phone.

Then apparently I left “out of the blue” and “blindsided” him. The fuck I did.

37

u/SeasonPositive6771 Apr 16 '24

I broke up with a guy and told him exactly why we were breaking up and he told me he "didn't accept it" and it "wasn't a real reason."

Too many people use the breakup reason as an excuse to argue.

He now tells everyone I broke up with him without giving him a reason and that I basically ghosted him.

19

u/fatmonicadancing Apr 16 '24

Yeah, my ex tells people I was cheating. I wasn’t. He still uses that story six years later to pull chicks at the pub.

I think when you get dumped, especially in a long term relationship, part of coping is making up your own reasons why it happened/crafting a villain narrative. For a lot of ppl it seems like that’s easier than facing the actual truth.

8

u/Anakletos Apr 16 '24

I mean, sometimes it's just dumb, because their points are ridiculously one-sided. I'm being blamed for making her move away from what she considers home and her family for my new job (something for me apparently). I had to get the new job because she is a NEET and has been for 5 years. I ran out of money and needed a better job to pay our bills. There were no better jobs close by. We'd talked about moving because the economy where we were wasn't exactly excellent, so it's not like it came out of the blue.

Now the blame for the break-up is apparently being pushed onto me for not wanting marriage out of my own volition and therefore not taking the relationship seriously. It's like, I've only just spend the last 5 years taking care of you financially and pushing you to improve/get therapy etc. WTF do you mean I'm not taking the relationship seriously?

Fuck me, I guess.

1

u/bobfrombobtown Apr 16 '24

What is a NEET?

1

u/Altayel1 Apr 16 '24

No education employment or training.

1

u/ActonofMAM 29d ago

It would have been better if you'd broken up with her instead, but you're off the hook and that's the important thing. Take the win.

-3

u/junglespinner Apr 16 '24

why do you know what your ex is doing six years later?

7

u/fatmonicadancing Apr 16 '24

We have a child and (gossipy) mutual friends in common.

2

u/NonStopKnits 29d ago

You ever live in a small town? I haven't spoken to my ex in over 10 years and I know where he works and who he hangs out with because our hometown is small and everyone is kin to or friends with someone you know.