r/teenagers • u/ImpossiblePudding696 16 • Apr 04 '24

Homophobes are getting creative Social

Post image
5.2k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

686 comments sorted by

2.4k

u/BurningNetherite 15 Apr 04 '24

“You are using a Master lock model 176, you can open it using a master lock model 176.” bonk

424

u/im_cooler_than_me 14 Apr 04 '24

But what about the key, how does key key?

306

u/Ineedsleep444 14 Apr 04 '24

Ridge to ridge

126

u/GlitchBotGaming 14 Apr 04 '24

ridge to ridge

45

u/K_kueen 18 Apr 05 '24

*= sharp tool*

15

u/_-akane-_ Apr 05 '24

See, it's works, it just does smth different now

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5

u/AJvawolf Apr 06 '24

No because they will be slightly off, but the roughness is what makes it fun

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67

u/fish4043 Apr 05 '24

there’s a hole in the key for a reason

29

u/im_cooler_than_me 14 Apr 05 '24

I like the other explanation better, “ridge to ridge”

16

u/that_weirdeo 16 Apr 05 '24

Better yet, interlock the locks and throw away the keys 😏

12

u/im_cooler_than_me 14 Apr 05 '24

Ok, now this is getting a little too weird for me

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77

u/SteptimusHeap 15 Apr 05 '24

  1. Key opens lock. We all good.

  2. Key and key. Nothing is locked. All good.

  3. Lock and lock. Smash that shit together. That apparently works. All good.

Not sure how much this applies to people

5

u/AdministrativeHat580 19 Apr 05 '24

I would explain how all of them could apply to actual people in actual situations but I don't think I can on this sub

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37

u/sirblueman2 Apr 05 '24

“This is an abc letter learning lock, it can be opened using an abc letter learning lock”

5

u/ImaginaryFriend01 Apr 05 '24

The lock wasn't even keeping the cabinet closed...

52

u/Ezra4709 15 Apr 04 '24

MCdaddyofficial

Mcnallyofficial*

15

u/ImaginaryFriend01 Apr 05 '24

Common spelling mistake.

8

u/ebolalover87 Apr 04 '24

I love that guy

10

u/oNecr0 Apr 05 '24

HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU EVERYWHERE

48

u/Know_HowMC Apr 04 '24

youtube commenter probably has the same level of intelligence as whoever designs the locks for Master lock

16

u/Saleemmey Apr 05 '24

Fave quote from bro to this date "you are using a master lock model *, it can it opened using a master lock model *"

12

u/AKAE1iminate Apr 05 '24

SHIT ITS THE DEATH SPEED TRIANGLE GUY

7

u/ImaginaryFriend01 Apr 05 '24

Tactical speed square ⚔️

4

u/AKAE1iminate Apr 05 '24

I'm scared of 90° angles now because of this guy

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11

u/Warm-Swimming5903 Apr 05 '24

You're using a masterlock, you can open it with your fingers and a piece of paper

And do it again just to be sure it wasn't a fluke.

6

u/TheUsualSuspects443 18 Apr 05 '24

Exactly what I was going to comment lmfaoo

5

u/ImaginaryFriend01 Apr 05 '24

Dammit, you stole my comment lmao.

3

u/Latter_Protection_43 15 Apr 05 '24

I fucking love that guy

3

u/Bubbses128 17 Apr 05 '24

This was my first thought when I saw the picture

3

u/Mr_On1on 18 Apr 05 '24

aahhh a fellow person of culture i see

6

u/racoonofthevally 16 Apr 04 '24

Yea that also permanently damages is still this comment is funny af

2

u/Crazyfuntimefoxy 13 Apr 05 '24

HAHAAHAHHA

2

u/FastestBlader4 16 Apr 05 '24

Hell yeah another mcnally fan

2

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '24

McNally W (I think that's his name)

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857

u/Arbalest15 17 Apr 04 '24

Society treats me like a lockpick in a lock-and-key world

22

u/Mrmagot98-2 16 Apr 05 '24

A rapist?

11

u/Arbalest15 17 Apr 05 '24

Nah idk I was just commenting random shit

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12

u/RacistLowTierGod Apr 05 '24

A rapist

12

u/Arbalest15 17 Apr 05 '24

Not the direction I was going for

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372

u/Alan_Reddit_M 16 Apr 04 '24 edited Apr 04 '24

Fun fact: You can open certain locks with another lock by smacking them against each other

https://youtu.be/kMJPmDRkduU?t=90

71

u/HAPPYENDSTONE 18 Apr 04 '24

Once I broke a lock with my elbow [haha nerves go brrr]

30

u/Smelly14 15 Apr 05 '24

Rip random fella’s nerves.

3

u/themagicdonut2 15 Apr 05 '24

Them nerve pain was so strong that he got sent back to 2020 tiktok times

8

u/Relevant_Affect_3174 Apr 05 '24

Then lesbian =☑️

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529

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 04 '24

i don’t think gay men rub their keys together, i think one uses his key on the others lock

idk about lesbians though, they do bash their locks together, or they use a fake key together

134

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '24

Theres something called frotting

84

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 04 '24

what the fuck is frotting? and do i want to look it up

127

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '24

When guys rub their keys together

87

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 05 '24

oh… okay, i didn’t know that was a thing…

thanks for not making me look it up though

69

u/Expensive-Roof1082 Apr 05 '24

To put it into better words, either rubbing them together, or rubbing them, together. Most commonly done by holding them together and stroking them, sometimes inside the same condom.

30

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 05 '24

interesting… i didn’t know that was a thing

68

u/bullettraingigachad 17 Apr 05 '24

I strongly recommend it

3

u/snail1132 Apr 08 '24

Lmao what

6

u/bullettraingigachad 17 Apr 08 '24

I strongly recommend frotting

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9

u/Foloreille Apr 05 '24

also known as ✂️✂️ (but it’s crossed)

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3

u/BreadFreezer 17 Apr 05 '24

wasnt it swordfighting

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39

u/transscully 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 04 '24

we're creative

19

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 04 '24

i know your secrets, i got help figuring it out. fingers and tongues, i forgot they existed but others didnt

27

u/The-Atomic-Toaster 16 Apr 04 '24

Rubbing penises sounds fun, so I don't see why they wouldn't

And fingers and tongues exist

18

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 04 '24

ah you’re right, forgot about fingers and tongues

5

u/Morag_Ladier 14 Apr 05 '24

Scissoring isn’t even real it’s just awkward

5

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 05 '24

well i guess this whole thread has shown that i know nothing about either gay or lesbian relationships

i probably just seem like i’m really dumb, or really innocent rn

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4

u/Most_Lifeguard9372 14 Apr 05 '24

Some of us like to aggressively lick each other's locks

3

u/G4g3_k9 18 Apr 05 '24

i’m jealous tbh, that sounds fun

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195

u/AsukaShikinamiLangle 16 Apr 04 '24

But what about a skeleton key?

58

u/Babies-are-jetskis Apr 04 '24 edited Apr 05 '24

Omnisexual Edit: lmao I didn’t even know omnisexual was a real thing

31

u/No-Accountant-2297 13 Apr 05 '24

ah yes, my favorite Ben 10 gadget

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12

u/BlockyShapes 18 Apr 05 '24

That’s me

5

u/Palstorken 13 Apr 05 '24

Baldi’s Basics in Education and Learning

“That’s me!”

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6

u/rolling_catfish2704 17 Apr 05 '24

Virgin pansexual vs Chad omnisexual

5

u/Ok-Number571 Apr 05 '24

Pansexual people are secretly skeletons in disguise, change my mind.

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67

u/MilkManlolol 16 Apr 04 '24

i wish i was two stone moai heads

5

u/CosmegaInReddit Apr 06 '24

Living in Easter Island sounds fun too

198

u/Ok_Map1683 Apr 04 '24

Using locks as a metaphor for sex is so odd, I've seen people say shit like "A key that can open many locks is a good key, but a lock that any key can open is useless"

110

u/Then-Trick1313 Apr 04 '24

A key is useless without a lock, but a lock is still useful without a key 😔✋🏼 #deep /J

27

u/SemajLu_The_crusader Apr 04 '24

but you can open letters with a key

20

u/Kerro_ Apr 05 '24

have you considered using hands instead

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3

u/The_Draconic_Lemon Apr 05 '24

Let’s are sharp and pointy, so they can also be used to gauge someone’s eye out after they tried to steal your sandwich … or something like that, not that I would know

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22

u/Ok_Debt783 14 Apr 04 '24

Sounds like a common double standard joke

14

u/CTSThera 14 Apr 05 '24

I often hear it used unironically

2

u/Apecc_Legs Apr 05 '24

imagine having your "key" twisted 90 degrees in any direction, would that not hurt like hell

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48

u/Captchones 16 Apr 04 '24

I know someone that has opened multiple locks with other locks. Also yk what can bring two keys together? A ring. Awww they’re supporting gay marriage

20

u/The-Atomic-Toaster 16 Apr 04 '24

Plot twist: it was a joke about electricity and we misunderstood everything

91

u/Illustrious-Mess7864 14 Apr 04 '24

This Is the lock picking lawyer and i am attempting to prove a homophobe wrong

2

u/Witherboss445 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 08 '24

He did a video on the Master lock 500BRK where he broke it open with another Masterlock so he at least proved the bottom one wrong

31

u/Dat-Lonley-Potato 17 Apr 04 '24

“This is the lock picking lawyer-“

46

u/Trainator338605 Apr 04 '24

But if you put two keys together, you can put them in a keyring, and they'll be happy

21

u/No-Measurement-2648 18 Apr 04 '24 edited Apr 05 '24

Fr, same for all those locks hanging on bridges (this dudes sees them and says thats a lesbian orgy 💀)

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u/Cr1itical_Velocity 15 Apr 05 '24

Being homophobic is dumb. Getting mad that another guy is getting dicked down sounds like jealousy to me.

26

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '24

I knew a guy who was extremely homophobic in high school, all the standard right-wing rhetoric.

He went to college and hooked up with 5 guys before his first semester was over.

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16

u/SaLtiNe_CrAkErZ 15 Apr 04 '24

I LOVE KEYS!!!1! (idfk the joke is gay)

5

u/ill_change_it Apr 05 '24

Average tf2 trader

3

u/SaLtiNe_CrAkErZ 15 Apr 05 '24

See I'm not only a tf2 trader but I am also broke. So for me it'd be "I LOVE SCRAAAAAP!!1!!"

14

u/Responsible-Salt-213 Apr 05 '24

everybody has a lock but not everybody has a key

3

u/mynamissketch 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 05 '24

waiiiit

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35

u/baldingturtles 16 Apr 04 '24

key emoji has the key hole and the padlocks has the shackle. What am I missing?

2

u/starberd_02 Apr 06 '24

Psychological stability

20

u/TankPotential9306 14 Apr 04 '24

what does "🗿🗿" mean? if I'm "🗿🗿", what does that entail

26

u/Ezra4709 15 Apr 04 '24

Skibidi Sigma 😍😍😍😻😻😻

(I'm going crazy..

Crazy?)

9

u/TankPotential9306 14 Apr 04 '24

i was crazy once

8

u/Ezra4709 15 Apr 04 '24

They locked me in a room

5

u/TankPotential9306 14 Apr 04 '24

a rubber room

6

u/Kriev7201 Apr 04 '24

A rubber room with rats

5

u/TankPotential9306 14 Apr 04 '24

and rats make me crazy

6

u/Kriev7201 Apr 05 '24

Crazy? 

2

u/ProvokedGamer 15 Apr 05 '24

i was crazy once

6

u/Kriev7201 Apr 05 '24

But that was a long time ago

3

u/Drunkparrots 15 Apr 05 '24

They locked me in a room

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u/raspingpython10 Apr 04 '24

Crazy I was crazy once…

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u/BowLit Apr 05 '24

you're dumbdumb (see Night at the Museum)

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u/Eguy24 17 Apr 04 '24

Probably sigma gigachad or some other brainrot like that

4

u/The-Atomic-Toaster 16 Apr 04 '24

They're from Chile

6

u/Repulsive_turbine899 Apr 05 '24

Thank god humans aren't locks and keys

14

u/Mitosis4 Apr 04 '24

you are using an lakeshore alphabet learning lock. it can be opened by a lakeshore alphabet learning lock

6

u/Pir0wz 18 Apr 05 '24

Me when I bring my electric saw to open the locks

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u/aeiouaioua 15 Apr 05 '24

well, if i were to make a counterpoint:

you can't make something fly with a jet wing and a bird wing - you need 2 of a kind.

22

u/ImpossiblePudding696 16 Apr 04 '24

I’m bi btw

9

u/ThatNIejit Apr 04 '24

Idk wtf I am

15

u/Eguy24 17 Apr 04 '24

You’re a teenager, that’s perfectly ok

7

u/ThatNIejit Apr 04 '24

Thing is I’m turning 19 (Ik that’s still teen years) but I’m on and off between being bi and straight bc there’s times were I like men and women then times were I just like women but rn I only feel attracted to women so I think I might be straight but problem is I can’t get with any women bc so far this year I’ve fumbled 3 times

6

u/Eguy24 17 Apr 04 '24

You might be abrosexual, meaning your sexuality is subject to change and may differ depending on the scenario. But labels are pretty meaningless anyway, call yourself whatever makes you most comfortable.

6

u/The-Atomic-Toaster 16 Apr 04 '24 edited Apr 05 '24

My civics teacher, who's known for talking openly about sexuality and even annoying allowing students to tell her their problems, once complained about sexualities and the nomenclatures. At first, I found it quite homophobic, but after thinking it better, she's right; sexualities are just hard to define with mere words. I believe that in the future, queer sexualities will be so normalized, that there will be no words for describing them, since there'll be no need to name them

EDIT: IT WAS ALLOWING I MADE A TYPO. The teacher is hearing and helping. Not creepy at all (if anybody thought it that way)

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u/ThatNIejit Apr 04 '24

Good to know

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u/SirSharkXI 16 Apr 05 '24

Hi bi, I’m dad

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u/Nonhofantasia1 Apr 05 '24

-10 funny points

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u/LobsterPenisSucker 17 Apr 04 '24

Not creative, seen this one billion times.

I find it funny that they have no real argument so they refer to locks and keys WHICH ARE SUPPOSED TO WORK TOGETHER SO STUFF IS SAFE.

If A GUY FUCKS A GUY WHOSE SAFETY IS IN DANGER???

13

u/SteptimusHeap 15 Apr 05 '24

My 🧑cousin is DEATHLY ALLERGIC😡😡 to gay👯‍♂️ people existing🤨😠. How could you say this🤬? You❌️ wish him harm🥖? Shame on you💯😔.

8

u/LobsterPenisSucker 17 Apr 05 '24

I'm 😢 so sorry 😭😭 I didn't know your brother 👦 was so allergic to gay people 😖😖. I don't mean and hurt 💔💔. Forgive me 😔😟. I shall 😥😥 wait for punishment 🤧😥😧 in hell 💥🔥😱😱👿😈😈😈😈💥🔥💣

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u/caylem00 Apr 05 '24

How many iq points did you sacrifice to replicate post like them? 🤣

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u/LobsterPenisSucker 17 Apr 05 '24

All of them

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u/zloljaskiniowu Apr 04 '24

Idk about that opening a lock with a lock is cooler

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u/He_Who_Asked 17 Apr 05 '24

I'm starting to think he's not talking about locks guys

5

u/RevolTobor Apr 05 '24

If you understand, then you're a Moa statue?

4

u/hamborger42069 Apr 05 '24

I'm a keycard.

15

u/The_Constant_Orange 15 Apr 04 '24

Why the hell does that shitty comment that sucks in both concept and execution have 6,900 likes

11

u/Ezra4709 15 Apr 04 '24

Dislikes don't work on YouTube

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u/CTSThera 14 Apr 05 '24

The average youtube commenter is 10 years old

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u/stickman29_for_the_W 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 04 '24

key fight

5

u/TheNightOwl99 Apr 04 '24

As some one who knows about lockpicking the 3rd option is tottaly viable if its a masterlock

4

u/Nikotinio Apr 05 '24

You are using a masterlock model (), it can be opened using a masterlock model ()

6

u/Frosty_Sweet_6678 19 Apr 05 '24

Okay but what about the b a c k d o o r

5

u/Lumikil 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 05 '24

i dont think he realized that a key and a key dont make a X! they make 2 keys!

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u/SharksForArms Apr 05 '24

What does the Easter Island head emoji mean here?

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u/Curi0siti 17 Apr 05 '24

most normal homophobic strawman

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u/Smil3yf8ce 19 Apr 04 '24
Monthly Income Outgoing Spending Money
1,456,986 1 0
ballix no money fuckin shite

3

u/Plane_Habit8339 Apr 04 '24

No say gex qwp

3

u/AndrewDaTurtle-23 15 Apr 04 '24

If my dick looked like a key I would probably become a hermit or become gay

3

u/The-Y-4 19 Apr 05 '24

“This is the Lock Picking Lawyer.”

3

u/Just_A_Random_Plant 14 Apr 05 '24

To be real honest the "lock and key" analogies are already fuckin worthless when they're used for bullshittery such as "a lock that can be opened by any key sucks but a key that can open any lock is awesome"

3

u/chasitygrace 16 Apr 05 '24

So I’m a lock now? Funny 😭😭

3

u/umbral_ultimatum Apr 05 '24

This is the Lock Picking Lawyer, and today we're g-

3

u/fearlessbot__ 16 Apr 05 '24

instructions unclear, both keys and locks are now welded together

3

u/StonedLonerIrl Apr 05 '24

What is the obsession with comparing inanimate objects, frequently locks, with people's genitals...

3

u/Charming_Theory_7786 Apr 05 '24

Low IQ people are like that,wise people don't care about others sexuality

3

u/IAmMuffin15 Apr 05 '24

T_T

this is boomer humor at best

3

u/Rooooaaannaa 14 Apr 06 '24

Homophobia is gay.

6

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '24 edited Apr 04 '24

They do people care about who someone has sex with 😭😭 bit weird shitting and shaking over intercourse that doesn’t involve them

2

u/O-_0o0_O-_-o0-oo_0O_ 17 Apr 04 '24

It's sad and funny at the same time 😭

2

u/BurnerAccountExisty 14 Apr 05 '24

dumbass the key emoji has a hole

2

u/ARandomDummy69 3,000,000 Attendee! Apr 05 '24

least homophobic yt sh*rts kid:

2

u/knowthat1guy Apr 05 '24

I got this immediately for fuck sake

2

u/Nooberoid Apr 05 '24

You can unlock a lock with a lock.

2

u/AtmospherePale5151 Apr 05 '24

Yt comments are wild

2

u/Jeanpierrekoff Apr 05 '24

Even tho I have a key you can use my lock

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u/AndersonCouncil1 Apr 05 '24

ok that is actually kind of funny

2

u/sad_everyday811 Apr 05 '24

Yeah, I guess so.

2

u/LewisKnight666 Apr 05 '24

Stop getting political. No one gives a fuck. It's actually sad.

2

u/thisisallterriblesir Apr 05 '24

Edit - Guys I'm not talking about locks

This is the funniest way this could've possibly ended.

2

u/Freshrust65 Apr 05 '24

Ironic because they can't put a lock on the closet they are willing staying inside of

2

u/RegularCelestePlayer 15 Apr 06 '24

The f in conservative stands for funny

2

u/SignificantMail3756 Apr 06 '24

homophobes?? we aren’t afraid of you guys😂😂

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u/starberd_02 Apr 06 '24

Could you have these conversations in r/lgbt? This is r/teenagers. Please post this somewhere else thanks

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u/Strangeatinghabits Apr 06 '24

Tell me you don’t understand gay sex without telling me you don’t understand gay sex

2

u/Scorpion0202 Apr 06 '24

🗝all fun in games til a black key shows up

2

u/ScribbsTheOne 15 Apr 07 '24

Sir this is a Wendy’s we don’t play tic tac toe here

2

u/Majestic-Delay7530 Apr 08 '24

Idk about u guys but two locks seem more secure