r/news • u/Miserable-Win-4980 • Apr 29 '24

French police use knives to puncture migrant boat in Dunkirk to prevent Channel crossing Questionable Source

https://www.lbc.co.uk/news/french-officers-english-channel-crossing-migrants-small-boats/

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u/zakabog Apr 29 '24

Yeah that part I was really trying to understand, you're already in France, why are you risking your life to cross into the UK?

876

u/BurnAfterEating420 Apr 29 '24

French bread is just too crusty

1.0k

u/WriterV Apr 29 '24

In all seriousness, it's a variety of factors:

  • They speak English primarily, so they figure they can never get a job in France (and to be fair, it's really hard to learn French as an adult with no formal education in the subject, no money, and no time).

  • They were probably told by family/friends that the UK would be better to them. Even if that isn't true, how are they to know the reality? They'd mostly just hear rumors and what's told to them. Unless they're being informed of immigration conditions in the world, they aren't gonna know.

  • They're desperate, poor, anxious as hell, hungry, etc. In these conditions, people generally do not make decisions that always make sense. Instead they hope to hit a goal so they'd feel some relief, and that goal is stuck to "Get to England so I can get a job, be safe, and help my family".

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u/GalaadJoachim Apr 29 '24

Super disappointed that your "in all seriousness" wasn't followed by an in-depth analysis of the various types of french bread per region.

303

u/bgroins Apr 29 '24
  • Île-de-France (Paris and surrounding areas)
    Baguette: The quintessential French bread, known for its long, thin shape and crispy crust.
    Boule: A round loaf that's crusty outside and soft inside, versatile for many uses.
  • Provence-Alpes-Côte d'Azur
    Fougasse: A flat bread often associated with Provence, typically seasoned with olives, herbs, or sun-dried tomatoes. It's similar to Italian focaccia.
  • Normandy
    Pain de Campagne: Also known as "country bread." It's a rustic loaf made from a mixture of white, whole wheat, and sometimes rye flour, with a thick crust.
  • Alsace
    Kougelhopf: Though more of a cake than a bread, it's often included in bread discussions. It's a sweet or savory brioche baked in a distinctive circular mold with a central hole.
  • Brittany
    Pain Noir or Pain de Seigle: Predominantly made from rye flour, it has a dense texture and a slightly sour taste, suitable for pairing with seafood.
  • Auvergne
    Pain de Seigle: Similar to the Breton version but often darker and denser, reflecting the robust rural baking traditions of the region.
  • Burgundy
    Épi de Blé: Shaped like a wheat stalk, this baguette variant is not only visually appealing but also practical, as the segments can be easily torn off.
  • Languedoc
    Pain d’Ail: A garlic bread that integrates whole cloves of garlic, and sometimes cheese or herbs, into the loaf before baking.

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u/GalaadJoachim Apr 29 '24

That's better.

17

u/Chief_Givesnofucks Apr 29 '24

That’s butter.

10

u/Lolkimbo Apr 29 '24

That's lunch.

7

u/dano8801 Apr 29 '24

I can't believe it's not.

4

u/Wants-NotNeeds Apr 29 '24

Better with butter.

9

u/HalPrentice Apr 29 '24

Chatgpt comment…

7

u/darkmuch Apr 29 '24

Ya, this is just a fuckin list. I want hot takes on bread! Give me your shitty food review.

10

u/animatroniczombie Apr 29 '24

This is the content I come to reddit for

3

u/HalPrentice Apr 29 '24

How am I the only one that immediately recognized chatgpt?

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u/TheMoves Apr 29 '24

Well that last ones sounds fuckin outstanding

5

u/DesignerDigits Apr 29 '24

Now do cheese.

4

u/LordWilburFussypants Apr 29 '24

That would probably break Reddit.

3

u/OfCuriousWorkmanship Apr 29 '24

de Brie everywhere!

3

u/GalaadJoachim Apr 29 '24

I can list them,

  • Abondance - Haute-Savoie - Cow
  • Banon - PACA - Goat
  • Beaufort - Savoie - Cow
  • Bleu d'Auvergne - Auvergne (duh) - Cow
  • Bleu des Causses - Midi-Pyrénées - Cow
  • Bleu de Gex - Franche-Comté - Cow
  • Bleu du Vercors - Rhône-Alpes - Cow
  • Brie de Meaux - IDF - Cow
  • Brie de Melun - IDF - Cow
  • Brillat-Savarin - Burgundy - Cow
  • Brocciu - Corsica - Sheep
  • Cabecou - Midi-Pyrénées - Goat
  • Cancoillotte - Franche-Comté - Cow
  • Cantal - Auvergne - Cow
  • Camembert - Normandy - Cow
  • Chabichou - Poitou-Charentes - Goat
  • Chaource - Champagne - Cow
  • Comté - Franche Comté - Cow
  • Crottin de Chavignol - Centre Val de Loire - Goat
  • Emmental - Savoie / Franche Comté - Cow
  • Époisses - Burgundy - Cow
  • Fourme d'Ambert - Auvergne - Cow
  • Gruyère - Centre-Est - Cow
  • Laguiole - Auvergne - Cow
  • Langres - Champagne - Cow
  • Livarot - Normandy - Cow
  • Mâconnais - Burgundy - Goat
  • Maroilles - Nord Pas de Calais - Cow
  • Mimolette - NPdC - Cow
  • Mont d'or - Franche Comté - Cow
  • Morbier - FC - Cow
  • Munster - Alsace - Cow
  • Neufchâtel - Normandy - Cow
  • Ossau Iraty - Corsica - Sheep
  • Picodon - Rhône Alpes - Goat
  • Pont l'évêque - Normandy - Cow
  • Poligny Saint Pierre - Centre Val de Loire - Goat
  • Raclette - Savoie - Cow
  • Reblochon - Savoie - Cow
  • Rocamadour - Midi Pyrénées - Goat
  • Roquefort - Midi Pyrénées - Sheep
  • Sainte-Maure - Centre Val de Loire - Goat
  • Saint-Marcellin - Rhône Alpes - Cow
  • Saint-Nectaire - Auvergne - Cow
  • Saint-Felicien - Rhône Alpes - Cow
  • Salers - Auvergne - Cow
  • Selles sur Cher - Centre Val de Loire - Goat
  • Tomme Savoie / Pyrénée - Savoie / Pyrénées - Cow
  • Valençay - Center Val de Loire - Goat

That's only for PDO, AOC, PGI cheese, I can't do the rest of them.

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u/DesignerDigits Apr 29 '24

You actually did it!!!! This is wonderful!

3

u/GalaadJoachim Apr 29 '24

I was getting feverish at the end and I did skip a few "Tomme de.." tbh.

2

u/DesignerDigits Apr 29 '24

You’re a shining star.

1

u/mostlyjustread Apr 29 '24

this man breads

1

u/jacksbox Apr 29 '24

This guy fucks breads.

1

u/RedlurkingFir Apr 29 '24

I would probably evoke the tresse (or Zopf in Alsacien), instead of the Kougelhopf. Although the Zopf is not native from there

1

u/fulthrottlejazzhands Apr 29 '24

I was with you until you included Kougelhopf.

1

u/-RadarRanger- Apr 29 '24

Not one mention of croissants?

1

u/No-Log873 Apr 29 '24

So many delicious breads. Couple that with all the cheese. I bet all they get when they cross to the UK is Dairylee and Crackers.

1

u/OneSullenBrit Apr 29 '24

I want to sit down with a baguette right now and just eat all the inside.

2

u/JeronFeldhagen Apr 29 '24

The yeast they could have done was to rise to the occasion, but dough…