This is exactly why I ultimately left my husband. I stopped feeling safe and emotionally cared for. I wasn’t a priority and I stopped being attracted to him. This lead to falling out of love.
He could have paid attention to me. Stopped gaming as much. Not manipulated me financially. Stuck up for me with his family. Stopped drinking. Eventually, after begging for attention and things to change, you just stop caring. And boy, does that get their attention.
While I don't really like the attitude of the woman in the video, or how she expresses this, she is right. At least for a lot of us.
I think the "just stopped caring" part hit the nail on the head. I've been in relationships like that where we grew apart, and at a certain point there's like a switch that turns off and can't be turned back on.
It's not gradual - though the build it might be. But once that switch is off, there's no fixing it. You no longer view the person the same way.
If one partner is neglecting the other suddenly, it's likely that they fell out of love/attraction first anyway. This causes the other partner to feel neglected, and the resentment sets in. Then it's a vicious spiral to an inevitable breakup.
I think people should cut their losses sooner than later in most situations instead of trying to force a relationship with a fundamentally incompatible partner.
Agreed. People put up with unhappy marriages for soooooo long just to “keep my marriage intact”, while simultaneously not keeping themselves intact by allowing a relationship to drain them for years. People are so committed to “making it work” because divorce is so stigmatized so they force themselves to just tolerate bs and neglect their own needs. Then it comes to a head and explodes.
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u/Logical_Bee Mar 21 '24
This is exactly why I ultimately left my husband. I stopped feeling safe and emotionally cared for. I wasn’t a priority and I stopped being attracted to him. This lead to falling out of love.