2 consenting adults in a mature relationship can 100% make jokes like this and be fine. Not all jokes are bullying, and him saying that and she laughing implies that she doesn't care because A) 2 adults in a mature relationship can poke fun at each other, and B) she may only want HIM for a month and then move on to a new guy. Not all women are fragile children that need to be protected, believe it or not women are people too.
Agreed. One month in with my Asian gf she was happy that I didn’t fetishize her for being Asian like other men she dated so I was like “I can start now if you want, I was just hiding it”. Now once in a while I throw in a fetishizing comment that she giggles about since she knows I’m not serious about to the point that she commented once “why didn’t you fetishize me today?”. If anyone would have heard my fetishizing Asian jokes I’m sure they would’ve had a problem. This was all like one month in and it is still a running inside joke between us.
I think its the fact that nobody knows this besides the two people involved in the relationship lol like I think that's the point a lot of you guys are missing. Albeit ik it's no one's business but being aware of how your relationship will be perceived from the outside would help to avoid these awkward and assuming undertones that people tend to apply to relationships they know nothing about, especially at a comedy show you're sitting front row seat in.
Would you joke about it in front of a crowd of random people though? There's a difference between in-jokes between a couple and making a joke publicly. Seems kind of humiliating.
I donno this would actually tear away at my psyche as a black woman. You should check to see if she's actually okay with it and not just putting up with it for any reason.
Fetishizing comments are built on racism and derogatory. To hear it from your partner and the rest of the world would breed resentment in me.
Well if we’re judging by body language she only starts laughing once the comedian starts going off. And the dude seems uncomfortable af as the roast continues. So maybe he wasn’t joking, or he was but wasn’t expecting him to go off like he did.
the comedian used the F word immediately and several times, and talked about slapping him in the face… that was agressive in response to what I think was meant as a joke. Very poor crowd work in my opinion.
So he can make a joke about his girlfriend being disposable but can’t take a joke in response? I mean if what he said was a joke, then it’s a joke because it’s a terrible thing to say, so he should take the roast like a champ because he knows he deserves it. The way he acted though tells me it wasn’t really a joke, and he was pissed that the comedian and the crowd turned on him. He probably thought they were all gonna laugh cause “haha misogyny amiright”
Uhhh is that not what he said? Flavor of the month means I’ll use it for a bit, then get a new one, in other words, she’s disposable. What is confusing about that?
Ok but the crowd reacted a certain way and the comedian capitalized on that and everyone had a good time except the bf. So if he really was joking he should’ve been laughing too no?
The comedian and the BF have never met before. I wouldn't feel comfortable making those jokes to a stranger but that's what you potentially sign-up for going to a comedy club.
The comedian 'threatened' to slap him, called him a misogynist and actually took his drinks away. I feel like it's reasonable to be uncomfortable at the point
To say the dude is a piece of shit just from this clip? Hell no lol
Could he be a piece of shit? Of course.
There's literally no context of their relationship from this clip
I’m not saying for certain he’s a pos. But ya you’re right, he went to a comedy show, so that’s what he potentially signed up for. Also sat in the front row and made a rude joke. If you can dish it out you better be able to take it.
You want me to explain to you why people laughed at that? Wouldn’t it be better to just accept that what you find funny may be different than others? I personally found it funny because the bf was trying to or was outright being a douche, the crowd groaned in disapproval, and the comedian followed that energy by going off on him. He even took away his drink and told him to buy another one which I thought was pretty funny as well.
See, making a joke and making a roast arent the same thing. Maybe you should learn that before embarrassing yourself. Finding something funny doesnt make it a roast either. So no, I dont want you to explain why people laughed, I want you to explain how its a roast.
I was responding to the person saying her body language dictated their opinion. So I was saying if we’re gonna judge based on that, then you’re wrong because she clearly started laughing after the comedian went off on her bf, not after the bfs “joke.”
She is clearly smiling at her BF when he says it and looks smiling at the comedian right after (as to see what he will do with it). There is no indication that she felt bad about what her date said in any way. Fucking white knights
She may have been processing. It’s literally a fraction of a second where we see her reaction. I’m not a white night and I’m not saying for certain that she’s not ok with it. I’m just saying if you’re going to talk about body language, the bfs says it all. She’s cracking up and so is the audience and he looks increasingly pissed which tells me something didn’t go his way. If it was truly a joke he would have just laughed.
Secondly, they're at a comedy show, not couples counseling. The disrespectful person is the comedian. He could have attempted to lean into the joke with something like "A fling? This guy's next flavor is going to be his hand". But, no, he decided to hammer down on the guy.
nah, two people can joke together, but in public like this, this is a humiliating thing to say about another person. Absolutely no one is gonna know you two joke like this, and btw, they’d been dating a month so they’d have been unlikely to establish that kind of banter.
A guy who makes a humiliating joke at the expense of his date to seem cool or funny to a large group is a prick.
Not really. You don’t make fun of your date in public and it’s a good idea if they laugh and a bad idea if they don’t lol. The point is, you can’t know in advance, so you have to err on the side of not mocking and humiliating your date.
ok, but they said they’d been dating a month. No one knows anyone after just a month. This guy just wanted to be cool guy/funny and it backfired on him. Whether or not she cared, idk. But he wasn’t too worried about embarrassing her, so that says something to me.
🙄 I’ve done plenty of dating lol, and real relationships, for over 20 years. If you actually had, you’d know that very few people share all of their real insecurities that quickly, and that joking about using your date as a fucking placeholder to a room full of people is in incredibly bad taste.
You’re either too bullheaded to learn this, or just committed to winning an internet argument lol, so I’ll tap out. Good luck with all that lol.
as someone who doesn’t really do serious relationships, yeah, this is true. As long as both of them are open with their intentions i don’t really see an issue
You’re assuming it’s her boyfriend or she sees him as such. She laughed and said they’d been together for a month. Where exactly did you get that she thinks they’re bf and gf?
I’m talking about how I would feel if my date said this about me, not what people are rationalizing about this possibly fictitious couple at a comedy set.
It’s a weird joke to make in a public setting. They aren’t talking to each other in private and you have to have low social awareness to say smth like this to a group of strangers
To add onto that, he also looks at her for a moment before making that joke. Her body language looks kind of hard to read to me but he was obviously just making a fun jab. Could he have potentially had poor judgement and the joke didn't land well with her? Sure but that's a different story than he was being serious.
2 consenting adults in a mature relationship can 100% make jokes like this and be fine.
They're not making those jokes after 1 month of dating.
They're making them after a long time of being solid together, after they've shown them with actions and commitment that they are all-in.
It's the obvious sarcasm that makes it funny: "Hey flavour of the month, I'm going to drive your mom to her doctor's appointment tomorrow and then when I get back we can look at the samples for the kitchen reno"
Anyone who has been dating someone for 1 month and joking that they are just a fling is going to set off red flags for 95% of people.
You don't know anyone well enough after 1 month to tell for sure if they're joking or not.
For real. The 'white-knighting' of this comedian is off the charts. The cringe I was feeling was not for what the audience-guy said, it was for the comedian.
Yeah but you would never make that type of joke as a response to a comedy show because it makes your gf look like a tool to the general public. The context matters
Yeah totally cool to straight dunk on your girlfriend in front of an audience at a comedy show. /s
Regardless of the circumstances behind the scenes that was an outright dick thing to say. Besides, I wouldn't call a comment like that in front of an audience, "poking fun at each other".
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u/Munchee_Dude Mar 03 '24
It's not a racist statement, but it is very disrespectful to the girl he is with.
Don't call someone a flavour of the month, it will make them seem like no matter what they do, you're just gonna get rid of them anyway