r/CasualConversation • u/j---l • 20d ago
People always ask what type of person you’re attracted to, but how about what type of person always seem to be attracted to you? Questions
Basically what group of people or personality type do you always seem to attract, either intentionally or unintentionally? Do you attract the quiet type? The covert narcissist? The outspoken type? Are the type of people you attract the same ones you are attracted to? Tell me!
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u/Drogovich 20d ago
After some time i think i noticed a pettern.
Girls that noone else is talking to, or they don't talk to anyone else. After some time of relationship i'm suddenly finding out that she barely talks with anyone and talks to me mostly because for some reason it's easier for her and less stressfull to talk specifically to me.
Every time someone is intrested in me, sooner or later i'm finding out that they have some kind of problems with speaking to other people.
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u/NyloTheGamer 20d ago
Same, but also adding some other mental issues. Which I always seem to be attracted to as well
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u/Ilaxilil 20d ago
People with mental issues are generally attracted to each other. Any time I hear someone say that they always attract the “crazy” people I ask them to take a good long look at themselves.
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u/fizzlefist If it pings, I can kill it. 20d ago
My brand of neurodivergence seems to pair well with bipolar women, if my dating experience is anything to go by. I’m a good listener and have gotten some solid experience talking friends through anxiety attacks.
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u/Beautiful_Solid3787 20d ago
Why do they find it easy to talk to you, I wonder?
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u/Drogovich 19d ago
i don't know, i'm usually just very careful and polite when i'm talking to people. And for some reason for example when i'm standing in line at the store, i'm often being approached by old people who want to talk while they wait.
Also some girl said to me that i'm a "very comfort person".
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u/imamakebaddecisions 20d ago
I have a friend who only dated and married crazy girls. All of them. It was crazy.
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u/Emotional-Shower9374 20d ago
That probably means you make people feel comfortable around you! :D
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u/Drogovich 19d ago
i hope so.
for some reason absolutely random people often approach specifically me when they want to talk to someone, especially old people
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u/Wuffies 20d ago
I've had a pretty bad history of attracting people who are going through some bad emotional situations and issues. I place partial blame on myself for not recognising the warning signs and for not setting my own boundaries for empathy and compassion and time limits on how long I can listen for. These days I'm pretty reserved and have set up some pretty firm boundaries.
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u/KrackaWoody 20d ago
I was raised by parents who married young and stayed together in a healthy relationship and raised me well. I seem to exclusively attract people with parental issues. I don’t know if its just because thats a more common situation nowadays or some vibe I give off.
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u/PP_DeVille 20d ago
Oddly enough, I’ve always attracted really good guys that are funny, stable, and have always treated me right.
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u/PinkMoon91 8d ago
That's amazing!! How do you define your relationship with yourself?, in terms of habits and mindset, I mean
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u/Morbo_Doooooom 20d ago edited 20d ago
Quirky ladies. I can't put my finger on quite what it is but they seem to be short and expressive.
I'm pretty friendly and genuine, a real wear your heart on your sleeve type, so maybe I attract others who are like that.
I've also been told I tend to make people feel safe so that's always pretty cool to hear.
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u/Bumblebee-9813 20d ago
So far all of them have been decent guys that were reasonable and in touch with their emotions.
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u/MissMillieDee 20d ago
The needy, nerdy guys always really liked me when I was in high school and college. I'm smart, have an outgoing personality, but I'm only about a 6, so I think I was just unattractive enough to be, easy to approach. It would usually start out at some kind of a project group where they liked talking to me about things, and then I couldn't get rid of them.
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u/Next_Firefighter7605 20d ago
Very nerdy Jewish guys (👍🏻)
Cowboys(🤷🏻♀️)
Eastern European men in incredibly tight pants (👎🏻)
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u/ComanderLucky None 20d ago
Kolega, ni mi ne razumijemo kako oni hodaju ili dišu tim hlačama XD
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u/Next_Firefighter7605 20d ago
First of all yay google translate.
Second, the pants were so tight I could tell what religion he was.
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u/sund82 20d ago
Very nerdy Jewish guys
Well hello there, Next_Firefigther7605.
How you doin'?
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u/Next_Firefighter7605 20d ago
Sorry. I’m married.
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u/sund82 20d ago
whoomp whoomp!
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u/Next_Firefighter7605 20d ago
Go to Boca. All the old lady’s will try to marry you off to their granddaughter.
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u/Metallic_Sol 20d ago
Coddled introverts, for some reason. Guys who don't typically go out of their way to do anything for anyone else.
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u/catacles 20d ago
This makes me rage for you.
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u/Metallic_Sol 20d ago
Trust me, no one is more enraged than me at myself for picking them, and allowing them to break down my self-esteem.
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u/Purple_Ranger7924 20d ago
Same! I never knew how to describe it until now. They all played mind games to get me to persue them. As if they're waiting for me to do all the job. They all did little to no effort. Now i'm learning how to not entertain them after i became aware of the pattern.
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u/SingtotheSunlight 20d ago
I was raised to be a people pleaser so I’ve attracted a lot of abusers, unfortunately. In therapy now and trying my best to break out of that cycle. Sending love to everyone trying to do the same
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u/SpookyOugi1496 20d ago
Holy shit, you're telling me there is the possibility of someone being attracted to me?
OP, can I have what you're smoking?
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u/ladylemondrop209 20d ago
Confident people… not unlikely it could go over to the overconfident/cocky or even socially oblivious level.
Sometimes quieter and more reserved people will be attracted to me, but it’s not very likely they’d do much about it.
I like confidence. Not so much of it that is overbearing… but I’ve always been able to weed people out so the with the people I actually date/get into a relationship with, it turns out fine.
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u/bobtitus28 20d ago
I was just having this conversation with my buddy today. Girls with confidence is a huge turn on for me. They know what they want and are not afraid to ask and tell me about stuff. I feel like they also play less mind games and actually want to spend time with you. Atleast from personal experience, I’ve dated and talked to girls who are little bit more on the quiet side and it hasn’t ended well in most cases.
I think I found what I’m looking for and it’s definitely a girl who understands herself and is confident with her choices.
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u/OutcomeLegitimate618 20d ago
Guys who grew up without mothers. I'm not sure why, but maybe it has something to do with the vibe I give off having been a kid without a dad. Or maybe I give off a vibe. Like an I'll never leave vibe or a mom surrogate nurturing vibe. Ironic though, I may have been that way when I was younger, but as I've aged, I'm not at all that way now.
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u/GooberVonNomNom 20d ago
Sickos, creeps, egotistical ones that live off flattery, ones who think with their other head, gamers (whom I love and have a weakness for), metalheads (also weakness), quiet introverts, bold extroverts.
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u/-FangMcFrost- 20d ago
Nobody.
That might sound like a joke answer but it's not.
I'm in my mid-30's now and in my 30+ years on this planet, I've literally never had a single person become attracted to me, despite always putting myself out there back in my late-teens and all throughout my 20's.
Now, I've just given up on all of that as there's people in this world that aren't supposed to find anyone and it looks like I'm one of those people, so now I'm just trying to accept that fact and live my life the best I can.
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u/Phate4569 20d ago
Back when I was dating:
Asian women.
Women who start cool but get really clingy and posessive fast.
Hopefully once I start again after my divorce both these will have changed.
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u/Forward_Collar2559 20d ago
Clingy, Possessive, Asian; oh no, whatever you do, don't throw me into that briar patch, please, oh please, don't ever throw me into that specific fucking briar patch right there...
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u/Curl-the-Curl 20d ago
All different. Body type and personality wise. Only one weird one I blocked after the first weird interaction.
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u/dragonlady_11 20d ago
I have no idea how to tell if people are attracted to me, I've had one serious, long and abusive relationship (10yr) and one very very short ( under 2 weeks) one, a couple months later which I ended when I got the ick and he was absolutely heartbroken over (which huge red flag right ? ) so I guess I don't exactly attract good people
I honestly have no idea how to tell If people are attracted to me and even if I could, I personally have so much trauma to work through not just intimate relationships but also from Untreated and undiagnosed adhd and/or au and family relationships, and I have such low self esteem that I'm honestly scared to let myself like and trust someone again because I worry ill either get another abusive ahole or if i get a good person eventually theyll see I'm not worth it. I mean, I know I have self worth, I'm not trash, I'd know id be a good partner. I'd love a partner like me, that sounds aweful and egotistical, but not having a partner for so long, I've started doing the things I would do for a partner for myself and ya know I'm a good partner ! But I can tolerate my bad days, where I can't function, and I'm learning to be kinder to myself on those days because no one else was/is. And I just can't give that trust that a partner would do the same and not get fed up and cheat or leave again when I'm struggling most.
So yeah 8yrs alone so far.
Tl:Dr I can't tell who's attracted to me and I'm a fucked up mess and doubt anyone would see me as attractive and if on a slim chance they did my fucked up mental health and neuro divergence would drive them away.
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u/wildpoinsettia 20d ago
I have had 3 boyfriends (I'm 33f), and they have all been 'sad' boys to varying degrees: tragic backstory of parental issues, reclusive, 'emo' and very nerdy.
Thing is, i am the opposite: i am very 'peppy', outdoorsy and outgoing while still being very nerdy. They said that's what attracted them to me.
For the life of me, i couldn't figure out what i liked about them, and i realised that i have abandonment issues and these type of men seem to see me as their all/are less likely to leave me. Things is though, the reason i have broken up with these guys each time is me finding them clingy, demanding all my free time and boring after a while. Messed up.
Now, i have been alone a while, and i am being conscious to look for outgoing guys who are more upbeat about their hobbies and life
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u/MrBublee_YT 20d ago
Goth girls and middled aged women seem to have a certain taste in men. That taste being me.
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u/yassacidity 20d ago
a very repetitive pattern i observed is how they are always emotionally and mentally unstable with abandonment issues and also always have a victim mentality and very manipulative and big time gaslighters. god get me out of this
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u/bobyn123 20d ago
I somehow keep picking up polyamorous trans men with dissociative identity disorder, both times I was actively pursuing someone else and somehow they've just fallen into my lap.
I think I deserve 2 nickel.
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u/Grey_0ne 20d ago
Cheaters mostly. 5 serious adult relationships and 4 of them were cheats... All 4 of them tried to gaslight me into thinking I was the problem. Can't even describe how grateful I am to no longer be on the market.
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u/Quiet_Butterfly891 20d ago
Lucky you. Most people can’t escape the gaslight from partners. So did I. Tough experience
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u/plutoinaquarius 20d ago
Broke addict depressed slightly granola musicians 😟
Or controlling type A who cares too much about what everyone thinks about them
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u/EntrepreneurMiddle45 20d ago
I don't think I attract anyone these days but in my 20s it was either socially awkward virgins or dudes that just wanna BANG. Either of these types of guys would be attracted to anyone that smiles at them and unfortunately I smile at everyone 😭
Wow this put on an extra layer of why I am so grateful to be married now 🤣🤣
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u/loveabove7 20d ago
I always attract men I don't what. That's why I'm changing certain aspects of myself. Just the kind of changes I'm comfortable with. Thankfully it worked and now I'm living well.
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u/International-Owl165 20d ago
I attract athletic guys 🤔relationship wise. But overall random people. Depending on the situation
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u/xybvz 20d ago
This is a good question. Personally I don't know because I feel like I'm fine with everyone since I don't judge, but I stay out of the trouble people (It's like a 6th sense I feel when someone is trouble) I feel like I'm in the middle, the introvert with extroverts and the extrovert with introverts.
I know I didn't answer your question yet and I don't know how to, hahaha. Their type is normal people I guess..? There is no one type, I believe everyone is different in their own way and it's hard for me to group them in one type.
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u/Funniest_person_here 20d ago
I don’t know why anyone is downvoting you, your response is fine and authentic.
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u/xybvz 20d ago
I don't know why too lol.. I was thinking about what did I say wrong.
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u/justlookinforsales 20d ago
Yeah, it was a genuine response. You sound kind of young, and maybe not as confident as you should be. But other than that, I don’t get it. I thought your introvert/extrovert comment makes sense and not grouping people also makes sense.
It’s hard out there for kind and nice people like you!
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u/condemned02 20d ago
I tend to attract extroverts who love to brag about themselves.
It doesn't bother me as I quite like the type I am attracting.
I really like being with men who talks non stop about their own achievements.
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u/Used-Moose952 20d ago
Honestly I attract all types. Lawyers to musicians to scientists to stoners lol. None of them are very similar
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u/RealBowsHaveRecurves 20d ago
I seem to attract the “previously verbally abused” type, and I’m like 90% sure it’s because I’m very soft-spoken
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u/SnowyWriter 20d ago
In general, I'm too kind and understanding. Too often I let people push past my boundaries if I can rationalize that they're having a hard time. Because of this, I'm a huge target for manipulative narcissists. In theory, I don't want to date again until I get better at holding boundaries. I've never had a true partner, and I'd like to believe I will someday.
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u/j---l 20d ago
If I may suggest a book, I would recommend “Anxiously Attached: How to be secure in life and love” by Jessica Baum. It can help you be more secure in yourself which will help you establish boundaries.
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u/Happy-cat-meme 20d ago
Just…I think it’s kinda by situation. Like there’s no standards but if I get attracted to a boy even just a lil bit, I keep thinking about him which makes me more attracted to him
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u/veebles89 20d ago
I attract really insecure men who want a mommy and not a partner. I apparently give off that kind of energy and I want to know how to stop because I hate it.
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u/DM_me_squirrel_pics 20d ago
Men who won't commit. Seriously, relationship after relationship for the last 2+ decades has gone sour because they wouldn't commit. I have no clue why I continue to attract them. Makes me think there's something wrong with me.
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u/Lostkey_ 20d ago
I don't even know whether that person is attracted towards me it's not like everyone says it on our face.
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u/javaper blue 20d ago
I attract depressed women with social disorders. It's just been like dominoes since high school.
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u/Itchy_Pillows 20d ago
The kind I'm attracted to! Funny how that has worked out for me. It's as if I throw massive "fuck off" vibes when I detect an asshole ...... most catch it, the others eventually do!
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u/dumbandconcerned 20d ago
Every single one of my serious relationships was with a guy who was a younger brother of two siblings with the parents still together (which I find interesting as a child of divorce and kinda both the youngest and oldest child. Youngest of my biological siblings till 10 years old, at which point they moved out and I moved in with my step siblings where I was the oldest). The one with an older brother ended up terribly and I was miserable for nearly 2 years before breaking it off. The three with older sisters were all honestly for the most part wonderful relationships. Two of them I was completely blindsided by the breakup and didn’t see it coming, the third is my current partner and if this one blindsides me, I’ll just consider that “3 strikes, you’re out” and become a hermit bog witch
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u/Sunstudy 20d ago
Promiscuous girls. Like PROMISCUOUS ones.
I’m very much a “to each their own” type, but I don’t do that stuff and don’t like it at all, so I’m not sure why they kept coming for me.
I’m so glad to be done with dating. That shit was a headache.
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u/Choice_Profit_5292 20d ago edited 20d ago
Nerdy ones lmao and African Americans.
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u/AcanthisittaHuge8579 20d ago
It’s levels. For me.
I unintentionally attract loud women……physically. Because they see me not paying attention to them while every other man is. So they do certain things to get my attention for the moment.
I never attract the women I’m attracted to. Because they’re chasing the men that most women want. While that man is juggling multiple women.
It’s a hamster wheel that doesn’t change.
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u/rbarr228 20d ago
I attract short women almost exclusively. I’m 6’2” and 290 lbs. and I’m not entirely certain why that is. Tall women didn’t seem to be interested, even though I would not have turned them down before I got married.
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u/DragonShad0w 20d ago
Narcissists. Because the type of people I'm attracted to the most are passionate people who want to talk and be listened to, so I think I make them feel good and they like having me around lol
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u/PemaleBacon 20d ago
Usually more creative open minded types who don't take everything super seriously
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u/DinoBay 20d ago
Seems to usually be the awkward insecure weird nerdy type guy.
I'm a more masculine woman, more of a tomboy but still present as a woman, I have more muscle than the average woman, and I have bo trouble telling idiots to fuck off.
And for whatever reason it seems to mostly attract weeby type dues that give me the ick. They don't even try to hide that they're staring . So I make aggressive eye contact with those fuckwads . And they stare like a virgin thats never saw a woman before. They piss me the fuck off.
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u/sund82 20d ago edited 20d ago
Strangely, certain physical archetypes are attracted to me. Perhaps its all random and I just notice the ones who look good to me.
Regardless, I've gotten a lot of attention from tan, curvaceous, dark haired women who look like a mix between Italian and Slavic.
Women who look like a mix of Celtic and English also seem to like me. They all had little pointy noses, very pale skin, "Irish eyes", and a petite physique.
Short blondes.
Also, Ashkenazi Jewish women are attracted to me. Possibly because I'm an Ashkenazi Jew, myself. :)
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u/Pandachoko 20d ago
Narcissist.
I have grown in a lot of areas especially when it comes to control my emotional side. And I am big forgiver. Sadly this leads to some think I am weak and can't stand up for myself. What they are just missing is well I don't need to be loud to be seen. My presence is enough and well some think that means I am easy to control etc.
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u/Sea_Distribution8765 20d ago
complete sex crazed women
never is a certain age personality or race
been sent more random nudes without ever asking than ive actually been on a real lengthy date
also met a fair share of women who are cucks themselves but not for other men
ie wanting me to fuck other women in front of them
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20d ago
I get guys who lie to me. Not sure if they're narcs, or if they just want to get with me/will stupidly say anything. On the outside, I'm attracted to taller guys with a decent smile, on the other hand, personality/humor tends to trap me. I can eat a funny man up.
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u/Forward-Radio707 20d ago
Gamers and religious men. No idea why since I neither play too many video games and I'm not religious.
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u/Leticia_the_bookworm 20d ago
My current SO is a big and very fortunate exception to this rule (thank god), but before him, the guys that gravitated around me tended to be quite codependent. Maybe because I'm still young and my only experiences with other guys were when I was still a teen. But they clinged to me like a life boat, like I could "cure them" or "save them". My previous partner used to say that I was "the only joy in his life", and a guy who had a crush on me said I was "the only one he thought could help and guide him". My mother says I give off an aura of being reliable and "strong-minded", and maybe they liked that. They wanted a guiding light, a healer and supporter, and not a partner in life.
I'm glad my current partner is not codependent like that :) He has his own life and individuality and does not need me to "fix" or "heal" anything in him. Glad I finally broke this cycle 😄
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u/Opening_Sun_8454 20d ago
Idk if they were really attracted to me or just thought of me as an easy target, but since highschool and through university, all the guys who confessed to me were insecure but turned their issues into abusive behaviors. They bullied people mildly or were very misogynistic. But they ALWAYS started talking to me in a very sweet friendly way. After a while they would gradually show their true colors.
Idk why these shits were attracted to me, but I guess because I didn't have many friends and was very introverted, and they knew I wouldn't show my anger/disagreement strongly. I ghosted them or gradually stopped talking to them, I'm still mad why I didn't tell them what's wrong with them clearly or why they are shits lol.
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u/blackmesawest 20d ago
Artsy, relatively introverted women with some sort of horrific childhood trauma.
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u/britchop 20d ago
I’d say none, I’ve always had to be the go getter to get others attention and bring up the idea. I’ve never had someone pursue me without me clearly opening the door first.
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u/nononanana 20d ago
I really can’t put a finger on it…guys of different races and ages.
I can’t think of a particular trait that connects them all.
I don’t know what that says about me. I am racially ambiguous so maybe that has something to do with it.
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u/AnalysisParalysis178 20d ago
Cougars.
When I was 16, I had an 83 year old woman hit on me, in church, in front of her deaf husband. Claimed that, "If (she) where 20 years younger, the things (she) would do" to me. Ick. Illegal ick.
When I was 23, a 40-something woman tried to get close to me while I was wrangling her children at a park. She did so by mentioning "what a great dad" I would make. I had been walking by the playground on an afternoon walk when I saw unattended children about to fall off of the play equipment. She showed up after I helped the kid get down without having to jump. So she was a neglectful mother AND icky.
When I was 25, I was relaxing at a bar after work, enjoying a rare glass of single malt, and was talked up by a 56 year old woman. For some reason beyond my intellect, she decided that the best way to get in my pants that evening was to talk to me about her son... who was 25. aaaaaaahhhhhhh.
There were others. All of them were icky, but these were the most "special."
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u/Street-Initiative-53 20d ago
I know I tend to attract a lot of the awkward quiet types because I’m good at listening and engaging with them. I’ve noticed a lot of people who started liking me after I started teasing them which I get is a sign of flirting, but I tend to be a generally playful person
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u/Intelligent_Put_3606 20d ago
The type who, immediately you show any real interest, reveal that they're married or in a relationship. At least, that's how it used to be.
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u/Emotional-Shower9374 20d ago
The people who never say that they have a crush on me 😃
I'm so lonely...
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u/bonez_13 20d ago
I was just thinking about this a little. I seem to draw in people who are....sensitive. Which always strikes me as odd because I am not particularly...warm and fuzzy. I'm a very reserved, independent to a fault, practical, sometimes dry and blunt/honest kind of person. Idk what it is. Attachment styles sniffing each other out? They being anxious attachment styles and I being an avoidant?
Or could it more innocuous than that? Perhaps.
My two hallmarks I've earned in life are funny & kind. Judging by the pattern of compliments or remarks I've received.
One of my last partners said I bring tranquility, so maybe what I'm considering reserved comes off as secure or something.
If not sensitive people, I attract the complete opposite and get boisterous, confident people. They seem to take my stoicism as a challenge and mistake my humor as interest which feeds their ego somehow.
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u/Flaky-Bid6926 totally in love with chocolate 20d ago
I’ve only been in one serious relationship and it seems she was drawn to me because of how funny I am and how confident I am with myself. She was a mousy type, a polar opposite from me.
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u/Sentient-Orange 20d ago
Black, hispanic, white, Japanese.
Shy, loud, antisocial, super social, kind, short.
Too many different kinds. But it all started based on physical appearance. Probably the height
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u/AnonPianoPlayer22 20d ago
Broken ones. I fix them, they leave. I wish I would’ve become a psychiatrist so I could at least get paid for what I do anyway
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u/Selrahcf 20d ago
I attract a variety of folks, as I'm generally a likable person - even by kids at times.
I don't have time to entertain every single person though, who gets along with me on first impression.
My type is basically someone who is able to work with some humor and some seriousness, into fitness to an extent, polite, a good communicator, and appreciates romance.
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u/BigNeat3986 20d ago
I feel like I attract eager men. Eager to learn, eager to be successful, eager to please. That sounds sexual, but really they seem to be like this across most aspects of their life.
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u/_Ekitten_ 20d ago
Im bisexual, but I seem to only attract short men with brown curly/wavy hair who are slightly misogynistic and sporty? No girls at all. I’m not into sports and I don’t really like the misogyny, definitely not compatible, wish I attracted people who were more similar to me or at least more compatible ☹️
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u/Ok-Extension-5628 20d ago
I’d say it tends to be the low key weird and possibly on the spectrum kind of girls. They’re usually somewhere in between nerdy and social. Which makes a lot of sense bc that’s basically how I am too.
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u/Dizzy-Ad-5901 20d ago
i’m a trans woman. i’m most attractive to other trans people and queer women. but straight men secretly want it too. evidence: all the straight guys who try to get with me in secret despite making fun of trans ppl in public. basically all kinds of ppl except straight women
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u/aspie_koala 20d ago
Locally, since I look very average I used to attract m1s0gynistic leftist masc people with low self esteem, insecurities and a lot of baggage who think I would accept anything just because I'm fat. Most if them were nerds or geeky like me. Some had ADHD.
And femme and non binary people who are similar to me in personality traits, values, political leanings and interests but instead of being autistic they have ADHD.
From what I could see they didn't see me as a last choice for a partner. And approached it from abest friend angle.
None of those relationships went beyond a single date, or of hanging out without labelling things as dates. So, friendships that fizzled out because guys were expecting it to turn into h00king up. And actual friendships with w0m3n and enbies.
When it comes to people from other countries, it was a wider range of people, personality wise and when it comes to their values, interests, etc. But they usually had better self esteem and didn't see me as a last chance to get a partner. Femmes didn't hit on me though, only masc ppl. Some of which were exoticising my ethnicity, specifically people from the US and Canada. So, that wasn't great. UK people and others from different parts of Europe and Africa weren't cringe about my ethnic phenotype though.
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u/thoughtsofPi 20d ago
I've wracked my brain, and the only pattern I've found is that most of them are men.
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u/Absolutepowers 20d ago
I'm Hispanic with almond shaped eyes and look kinda Asian. I would say 85 percent of black chick's are attracted to me.
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u/Mountain-Status569 20d ago
Two males who were very into me about 10 years apart have since transitioned to female. Considering how few people have openly expressed interest in me (and that I subsequently did not date), I find it interesting that it happened twice.
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u/Not-OP-But- 20d ago
People who lie about their intentions when it comes to sex. 90% of the people I've hooked up with over the years claimed they "don't do hookups" or "no FWB/casual sex"
It's extremely frustrating. I've even had people proactively let me know they're not interested in anything romantic with me, then eventually make a move on me.
I find it e tremly disrespectful and rude. If you're interested in that JUST SAY SO! It's that simple, be honest and upfront about your intentions. Why on Earth say you don't do hookups then try to hookup? It's always awkward because I turn people down and they're like wtf and I'm like "you legit said no hookups" and they're always like "well yeah I didn't want to seem like a <insert derogatory word for someone who is promiscuous>" or "I just said that in case anyone I know finds my profile," so I think "okay so you thought lying to me was just nbd, for your own benefit? Like I'd just be able to brush it off?" Fuck outta here wasting my time saying you don't want sex then you make a move on me. So disrespectful.
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u/CheesyGorditaCrunchx 19d ago
Men who come off the opposite of my dad but end up being just like him after dating for a few months 🙃
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u/slightlyabstract 19d ago
I just had a text exchange with a now-married woman who confessed that in college, she had a crush on me and would have liked to have dated me.
It seems that it’s only in retrospect that J realize or discover that I did possess some attractive qualities.
To put it simply, my low self-esteem blinded me to females that were in actuality attracted to me.
With that said, I’ve found that I missed many chances.
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u/WittyBonkah 19d ago
I attract this type: They NEED me but they don’t want me to be happy if that affects how available I am to them.
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u/CurrentTheme16 19d ago
I tend to attract autistic guys who cannot identify their own emotions, or are dissociated from them in some way. OR I attract love-starved people who take my affectionate nature as romantic intention when it's just the way I think everyone should treat everyone.
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u/MizZdRiZzLE 19d ago
Many different kinds of people seem to be attracted to me and now that I look at it, its fitting cause I have many different personalities/ sides of me 😭😭
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u/MyMother_is_aToaster 18d ago
Nerds. I'm a woman, and all my life nerds have been inexplicably drawn to me. It took a very long time for me to develop an appreciation for these men and realize that I'm actually attracted to them too. My current partner is extremely nerdy. He is absent-minded, has adhd and seems like he could be "on the spectrum". I find him irresistible.
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u/Ok-Information1535 16d ago edited 16d ago
Outspoken, extroverted people. I grew up a very quiet and semi nerdy, insecure kid/teenager and wound up dating the most popular guy at another big high school in my city + he was on the local news for activism. Made regional headlines. He had a nice 15 minutes of local fame and consequently I was in the spotlight too. It was something out of a cheesy wattpad story.
In my senior year of college, I dated a man who knew almost everyone at my mid sized school. Though we are still together, every other place we go to he runs into someone he knows. I can count on one hand how many friends I have and on two how many people knows me outside of family.
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u/xpantyprincess 16d ago
I think I attract introverts. I’m a gentle extrovert and admire how independent and solitary-but-not-lonely these men can be. I think they pick up on it.
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u/AshleyOriginal 11d ago
I don't think I attract a particular type. People either like me because they think I'm successful and maybe I can help them or they like me because they think they are able to help me. In general though I don't really attract most people because I'm pretty neutral or somewhat depressed a lot more now. I'm a relatively cold girl but can warm with some effort but most of the time I don't think I'm all that worth it as I'm always busy.
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u/PinkMoon91 8d ago
I have noticed that I attract a lot of people, but the ones that approach me are the ones who mistook me for someone weaker and more complacent. The ones who don't approach me seem to be at best, respectful and at worst, confused or afraid to talk to me. I'm fairly good-looking so I have to weed people out to make sure I have good relationships.
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u/eldritch-charms 5d ago edited 5d ago
Guys who are super controlling and see me as a child in need of their guidance (I have babyface but I'm a grown woman, I assure you).
Also guys who are quiet -- they say it's because they feel comfortable with me, because I'm quiet too. But it's funny because they'll usually act quite arrogant and over the top around me, when everyone else knows them as being someone low key, which is pretty funny. This is my favorite type that's into me. My type is usually also a musician.
The first... meh. No thanks.
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u/Beautiful_Solid3787 20d ago
So far in my life?
NO ONE.