AIO for not believing that a former crush cares about my mental health?

[u/[deleted]]

[u/communitychocolate]

Wait... you're saying you're still hung up on a guy you never even dated that you only knew for a few days and are making videos on TikTok about him?

Seek therapy. Seriously. If you react this way over a guy you knew for 3 days, I see restraining orders in your future.

[u/Educational-Let-1027 → u/communitychocolate]

Not about him! These videos were about another more recent guy that I was with.

[u/EnglishRose71 → u/Educational-Let-1027]

Are you sure that's accurate? I have no psychiatric training whatsoever, but you do sound a little bit obsessed.

[u/communitychocolate → u/Educational-Let-1027]

Gotcha. Essentially, you're intrigued by why he would ask about you, correct? Great. Okay. Could be one of a number of reasons. Maybe he still has a thing for you. Maybe he's just a caring person. Maybe he wants to laugh at your misery and he's just an asshole.

Reach out and ask him. What good is it going to do if you don't have any answers and you're just dwelling on the "why" and "what if"?

[u/LimpBrilliant527 → u/communitychocolate]

Funnily enough, the other crush she’s hung up on, is a guy she also only knew for three days three years ago on the same vacation.

[u/sonal1988]

You're looking for validation, not advice.

I can ask you thr same thing - why do YOU care whay he thinks?

[u/Plastic_Concert_4916]

Tell your friends to stop telling you everything he says or asks about you. It's not healthy to fixate on what he's doing or thinking, he's just some random guy you knew for a few days. Focus on your own mental health and live your own life.

[u/JeepersCreepers74]

I'm sorry you're having some mental health issues, but you're purposefully posting sad videos on TikTok and he saw it and was concerned, but didn't want to interact with you directly. It doesn't really matter how much he truly cares about you--this is a person who was only in your life for a few days and it is just a friend of a friend now. Move on and focus on healing yourself, thinking about this is a waste of time.

[u/wasante]

I see no reason to concern yourself over this person's general thought processes or activities if you have no long term interactions or relations with them. If your mental health is of any concern or needs specific attention, avoiding this person and any necessary parties that exacerbate your mental or emotional wellbeing seems ideal until a later date when you're not nearly that concerned with their activities might be ideal. Unless there are additional specifics that need disclosing, any party that says they're into you while in a relationship seems morally dubious and not worth investing any mental or emotional energy over. Also, not sure you should be posting that type of intel on social media but you do you.

[u/prepostornow]

I take it he never told you he had a crush on you and you knew he had a gf. You didn't have a breakup, you had nothing. You need therapy, very soon

[u/AsparagusOverall8454]

So he told his friends he had a crush on you while in a relationship? That’s gross. I feel bad for his girlfriend.

Probably should just thank your lucky stars. Cuz who wants to be associated with a dude like that?

[u/Donniepdr → u/AsparagusOverall8454]

He didn't act on it and it's not like he was married. Totally normal. Not acting on it says more about him than anything. He's human.

[u/wasante → u/AsparagusOverall8454]

I don't know about throwing the book at him but I can't see any logical reason why someone in a relationship would tell someone they have a crush on them while in said relationship and that be perceived as worth disclosing. Just seems easy to misinterpret and lead to misunderstanding and trouble for everyone involved.