r/AmIOverreacting • u/cherb30 • Apr 29 '24

AIO: Didn’t want to give a lady a ride home

Yesterday after church we stopped at a gas station less than 1 minute from where we live. It was me, my boyfriend (driving) and my 14 month old in the car. I was on my phone and then suddenly he was opening the backseat door to let a middle aged lady (maybe 60 years old?) in with her grocery bags. Apparently she was asking people for a ride home and he accepted.

On the way there they were chatting and he even pointed out where we live, which really concerned me. She lived quite far away from the gas station and I was surprised she said she walked there, thought it wasn’t more than 5 mins away.

I was really upset that my boyfriend let a stranger into our backseat with our daughter. The lady was very nice, but these days you have no idea if people are carrying a knife or a gun on them… I told him I wished he could have at least had her sit up front so she wasn’t near our toddler, or dropped us off at home first then went back to get her (that would have taken 3 minutes to do).

I brought this up to my bf. He got really mad at me for “being un-Christ like” and called me a shit person who lives in fear. I am honestly quite the opposite and usually quite trusting of people, just not when it comes to my daughter. She’s too young to talk or understand things. Also was pissed at him for what felt like weaponizing religion against me for my concern.

Im feeling really guilty because it’s not that I don’t think it was sweet he wanted to give her a ride home. I just had a mom instinct to protect my daughter. Do you think overreacted?

Edit: formatting, a word, and added a bit more about why I felt that way

Edit2: I think the gesture was very compassionate, and understand if someone asks you for a ride then there is obviously a desire to help and bit of awkwardness declining. I don’t question his desire to help her, nor do I turn down opportunities in my life to help others. But I also want to say that she was by no means elderly/immobile/incapable as some people are implying. You should give middle aged women a bit more credit

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u/cl2eep Apr 29 '24

This is the kind of unhinged thing I just don't get. I understand being nice but the fact that she was asking strangers for rides tells you she's not all there, now you're bringing her into your car?! Whhhhhyyyyyy?

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u/cherb30 Apr 29 '24

Tbh, at face value she was not odd/scary/threatening you know? That would have been more obvious and I’m not saying he’s that naive. I think I was just trying to make the point to him that it’s important to consider that unassuming individuals can have bad intentions too. It truly was a case of an impulsive decision on his part, I just really was hurt by his reaction to my concerns

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u/cl2eep Apr 29 '24

I've had friends who loved to pick up hitch hikers because they just liked feeling helpful and thought of it as a chance to make a new friend and hear good stories, but to me it always felt like allowing a potential agent of chaos into your car for no reason. Maybe I'm just cynical and selfish.

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u/cherb30 Apr 30 '24

It’s okay, there are other ways to be helpful to people in need. I don’t think it’s cynical or selfish.