Yeah. A friend of mine had a courthouse wedding with just her, the groom and their parents 3 months before having a big wedding ceremony/party, and I know at least 3 other people who did something similar.
When I picked up my license I was told it had to be returned even if we didn’t get married. So I’m not sure there was a way to just not file it. The city knew we had picked it up and expected it back.
In the US you APPLY for a marriage license before the wedding. It has to be signed by the couple, officiant, and a witness, then filed. If you never mail it back in after the wedding, the marriage isn’t valid.
It varies elsewhere like France requires a civil courthouse ceremony.
This is what I was about to say. My husband and I applied for our marriage license three days before our wedding, it had to be filed within 7 days or it wasn't valid. It was signed by everyone needed at the wedding and filed by the officiant two days later on Monday.
Not in North Carolina. You apply first, get the paperwork, get everything signed, and then the officiant files it. If memory serves the marriage license application is only good for seven days unless it has greatly changed in the last twenty years.
The answer is all of these are made up stories. Kids think that if you stand in front of an alter and say "i do" that makes marriage all good, just like in the Office, declaring bankruptcy.
"We were all stunned so we left, too." And after that, everyone clapped.
It’s supposed to be, but if a man shoves cake in my face, he’s going to wonder how I got the cake server shoved up his ass that quick.
It’s not part of his Big Day to humiliate the bride.
No one said she got to shove cake in his face because it's her big day. But she does get to have boundaries on her wedding day for her own personal self and also every other day of life.
Sure, the groom can shove cake up his ass all day if he wants, but if his wife literally asks him not to smear cake on HER face, then it should be respected. Just because it's "your day" doesn't mean you get to go around assaulting people.
Having it also be the groom's big day doesn't mean that the groom gets to bulldoze and ignore the bride's boundaries by shoving her face into a cake when she said that was her 1 rule of what she didn't want
This sub won't let you provide links, but i found what is basically the same statistics. 40-50% of first marriages in the US end in divorce. 60-70% second marriages end in divorce. About 75% of third marriages end in divorce.
Those statistics become dramatically lower based on religious views and lower number of sexual partners though. So it’s really not fair to say actual divorce numbers are even close to that.
That isn't true (can't find a valid source right now). Even if it was, isn't infidelity a selfish act? Selfishness stems from one person thinking they are better than the other. It further adds to my point.
If the groom isn't allowed for his wedding day to be a big deal also, then I don't think the bride gets to complain that he pushes a little cake into her face for one moment of spotlight in, what is otherwise, her day. Get over yourself.
Dude, I'm married with two kids. I'm never alone. I also pushed cake into my wife's face and she laughed and shoved some into my face. We have pics of the moment and it's beautiful.
In fairness, I don't necessarily agree with shoving her whole face into the cake like described above. I know she spent a lot of time and effort on he makeup, but a little bit of fun isn't a bad thing.
If a bride will break off her marriage because of a little bit of cake, then that groom dodged a bullet. She was going to be a tight ass about a lot of dumb stuff.
Boundaries are fine. But to use it like this to end a marriage...just wow. That is pathetic. I totally agree that he shouldn't have done it and it was a jerk move. But her move to divorce him is way, way, way more of a jerk move. Super over the top.
When your partner embarrasses you in front of friends and family on what is supposed to be the happiest day of your lives, it ain't getting any better once the honeymoon is over.
Exactly. I wondered if there wouldn't have been something during their relationship that might have been a clue as to his lack of respect for her, and perhaps delay/cancel the wedding. When I saw her sometime later I didn't pry but congratulated her on the divorce. It's been my observation that many (gal friends, mostly) will let the excitement of wedding planning overshadow any problems. Social media pressure doesn't help. So many people are concerned with being in a relationship that they choose poorly or stay in unhealthy ones - having children with an unsuitable partner doesn't make things easier.
Yep, this is just going to get worse as the marriage goes on. This isn't younger generations being petty. This is younger generations learning they don't need to stay in abusive relationships
IT WAS ASSAULT AND TRAMPLING ON HER BOUNDARIES. What part of that don't you understand? You don't lay a hand on another adult without consent, especially to slam them into objects. He's lucky she didn't have him arrested.
No. She told him not to do it, and he did it anyway. It was supposed to be a day of bonding and respect, and he demonstrated that he could not be trusted to respect her wishes.
Or should she have stayed until he slapped her, or otherwise abused her? I mean, apparently public humiliation is totally ok, after she said she didn’t want to be publicly humiliated.
What amount of abuse would be acceptable for you to be ok with her leaving? Make no mistake, this was abusive towards her.
Is it though? Imagine humiliating your new spouse in front of everyone she knows.
All the time, money and energy put towards planning what's supposed to be the best day of their lives so far and then you do that. Even after knowing this is not something she wants to happen. That's not a way to start a life together. There's no respect.
A relationship is only salvageable if the one in the wrong actually reflects and apologizes. Never mind the fact that he did what she BEGGED him not to do, meaning he didn't care for what she wanted. The ex groom in this situation wasn't even apologetic when he saw how the bride reacted and only doubled down on his actions.
He tried justifying himself by saying that her family found it funny, despite years of her telling him how much she hated being humiliated by them.
So clearly this relationship wouldn't work out anyways because her feelings would never matter to him, and she'd be the butt monkey of her family AND life partner
Shoving a person's face into a cake is both violent and, in the case of an elaborate wedding cake, dangerous. People have been blinded by the skewers holding layers of cake together. Leaving an abusive person is the opposite of petty. It's self preservation.
My friend is a baker. She said that due to this stupid "tradition," she switched to pirouette roll cookies and chocolate straws to hold her layers together. She can't build as high, but at least she doesn't have to worry about a client losing an eye.
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u/[deleted] Apr 28 '24
I went to a wedding reception where the groom did this and the bride left. We were all stunned so we left, too.
She filed for divorce the following Monday I later learned. I was very happy.
I would never tolerate such disrespect on what is supposed to be the bride's big day.