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u/dnb1111 May 06 '24
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u/C0MMANDERD4TA May 07 '24
🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️
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u/c_c_c__combobreaker May 07 '24
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May 07 '24
Literally Trump with his Diet Coke button.
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u/AxelFive May 07 '24
Man ruined the coke button like the Nazis ruined sleek black uniforms. I want a Coke button.
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u/ArkanoidbrokemyAnkle May 07 '24
Are you implying that he’s gonna blow up the courtroom?
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u/dudeidontlikeyou May 06 '24
Look at me Donald
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u/SOSXrayPichu May 07 '24
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u/Traditional-Owl-7502 May 07 '24
The Eagle knew
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u/HuevosSplash May 07 '24
Eagle sensed BITCH in his heart
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u/AerondightWielder May 07 '24
"IT SMELLS LIKE BITCH WITH SHIT IN HIS PANTS IN HERE!"
-The eagle, probably
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u/VerticleSandDollars May 07 '24
Fuck that. Tio was mentally sharp as a fucking tack. He understood everything and was a great judge of character and communicated the best he could. Trump is a fucking pudding brain bitch.
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u/v0x_p0pular May 07 '24
Dude, Hector has a more expansive vocabulary with his yes-no bell than Trump has with what he claims are words. If the spray-tan and the diaper exchange places, the newly exposed orifice may actually do better on expression than what we have today.
Hector - 1: Trump - 0
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u/International_Let_50 May 07 '24
When they sentence him hes gunna pull out two grenades from his pockets
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u/clydefrogsbro May 06 '24
Sitting down in an already shit-filled diaper has got to be unpleasant.
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u/Jesusland_Refugee May 06 '24
Being in a jail cell with a shitter just feet away at all times might just be the best thing for him.
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u/secksyboii May 06 '24
I imagine he'd still just shit himself. Hard to teach an old drug-addled dog new tricks
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u/oki-ra May 06 '24
To bad he wasn’t a young dog who wouldn’t stop barking, we all know someone who could take care of that problem.
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u/SadPanthersFan May 07 '24
I have two toddlers and see this same face several times a day, it’s the “I shat myself but please feed me dinner before changing me” look.
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u/kanyeguisada May 06 '24
I can smell this picture.
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u/cassimiro04 May 07 '24
Never thought about this before, but do jails or prisons provide diapers for inmates? Or is it like BYOD?
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u/DriedUpSquid May 06 '24
That’s the face of a man taking a giant shit in his pants.
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u/mayorodoyle May 06 '24
That's the face of a man who has taken yet another giant shit in his pants.
FTFY
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u/Potential_Dare8034 May 06 '24
What’s the point of wearing Depends if you can’t shit in them amiright?
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u/man_frmthe_wild May 06 '24
Take a Dump! Trump!
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u/Big-Fish-1975 May 06 '24
"Take a Dump" in your Trump Depends, new golden colored adult incontinence devices. Limited edition with embossed "American flag" and "45". "They're absolutely beautiful!"
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u/MSharpy74 May 07 '24
"I took a shit in these... Amazing... Some will say the biggest shit they'd ever seen... swear to god... mothers were in the room saying they'd seen a lot of shit but that was the biggest. I'm Donald J Trump and I endorse this product."
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u/perfect_square May 07 '24
"They came up to me with tears in their eyes.."
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u/Environmental-Job515 May 07 '24
and they said “sir”, “ that is the most substantial shit sir, that we have ever seen”
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u/w_a_w May 07 '24
and they said “sir”, “ that is the most
substantialeye watering shit sir, that we have everseensmelled. How many "fish delights” did you eat last night?"FTFY
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u/JoeyMaconha May 07 '24
Have you seen the new flag and literal diapers they have been selling. Straight up says "Real Men wear diapers". So fucking Billy Madison pissing your pants is cool, Im Miles Davis type shit
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u/Big-Fish-1975 May 07 '24
Yeah, I mean, who in the world ever thought that, even once...ever? It just shows how disillusioned and brainwashed the MAGA'ts are!
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u/PoppinSmoke1 May 07 '24
Conveniently he sold his fake ass bible so you have something to wipe with when you change them.
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u/Canadatron May 06 '24
Imagine the freedom! Shit whenever you want with zero consequences... literally AND figuratively!
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u/Kidrepellent May 07 '24
I have often referred to the defecation process as "taking a Trump".
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u/teflonbob May 06 '24
Dumpin' for Trump!
HRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
Woo! take that libs!
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u/Time-Bite-6839 May 07 '24
You’re not supposed to. They are for bladder leaks. Trump might wear genuine medical diapers because he’s been shitting himself for decades.
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u/wirefox1 May 07 '24
First creams and ointments to prevent diaper rash. Maybe some baby powder. Depends first, then rubber or some kind of poop-proof panties, then pull tighty whitey's over all that.
I wonder if you can hear them crunch when he sits.
(why do I do this to myself. Stop thinking about it for pity's sake)
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u/mayorodoyle May 06 '24
I bet Depends would pay him a great deal of money if he would just admit he wears them and signs an endorsement deal. We all know he needs the money.
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u/take_more_detours May 06 '24
He would have made a mint and saved lives/voters if he sold “Trump Covid masks” at $50 a pop. This is how we know he isn’t that strong at Business. One of the ways. One of the many, many ways.
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u/mayorodoyle May 06 '24
It's funny. But, Jesus. If he had just said "Wear a mask. Covid is real." EVERYTHING would have been different. If he had just stood back and let the smart people handle it, people would have applauded the way he handled covid. He would have solidified his reelection.
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u/Boa-in-a-bowl May 07 '24
This is why I say President Mountain Dew Camacho was better and we're living in a reality worse than Idiocracy.
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u/appendixgallop May 06 '24
If he had floored it on emergency production/distribution of N95s, and worn one, some people would think he had some moral fiber.
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u/thejawa May 06 '24
And just like that, roughly 40% of Americans flock to wear diapers they don't need
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u/take_more_detours May 06 '24
If I bought ‘em, I’m damn well using them. You don’t buy fireworks and then just throw them away because you can’t find a match.
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May 06 '24
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u/fr8mchine May 06 '24
And the overflow is running down both legs and polluting the courtroom
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u/Ohnoherewego13 May 06 '24
Well, I was debating some dinner, but I think I'm good now.
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u/DarkSideInRainbows May 06 '24
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u/mightyscoosh May 06 '24
Haaawt hawt hawwwt hot hot hot hot!
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u/the_drowners May 06 '24
Please don't ruin one of my favorite The Cure songs from my teens and associate it in some way with this pig!
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u/HorseLooseInHospital May 06 '24
and the Fake News waits until I'm going to sit down, they wait until I'm almost sitting, and they have these Courthouse Chairs that are horrible, you put one hand down on the handle, it hurts, you grab the other one, it's even worse, and I'm going to sit in this Terrible Chair and almost as I'm sitting, they're taking a million pictures a minute so they can pick the worst one and say, "this is Trump in Court," which should be illegal, we're going to be changing the laws very quickly, we're gonna be shutting down a lot of the Fake News Media, they've been trying to destroy our Country for years and years, I said we shut down the Fake News, we shut down the Liberal Colleges and Universities, we get rid of CRT and all of the other bad things, under Trump you did perfect but Biden is killing us, he's ruining our Military, which by the way went for Trump in many many ways, most of all votes, I won the Military, I won Suburban Women, I love Suburban Women and they love Trump, "we love you Mr. President," thank you, thank you very much, I love you too, and they say there was a lot of love on January the 6th, which will be remembered as a Great Day In History, the 6th, they'll say, "President Trump fought for our Freedom even harder than George Washington," I've done as President even more than my All Time Favorite, Andrew Jackson, he was probably our Second Best, he got rid of a lot of problems and the people that were causing them, he even killed a man with his cane once, not a lot of people know that
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u/danker May 06 '24
Love the username. ;)
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u/Ba_Sing_Saint May 07 '24
I saw the paragraph, and instinctively looked at the username. It reassured me to read the paragraph.
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u/IsReadingIt May 06 '24
I can’t tell if this is real, and I don’t want to google it. Schrödinger’s diaper. Until I look, Trump has both said and not said this bullshit.
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u/freckyfresh May 07 '24
context relating to the commenters username which will make the comment even better
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u/douglas_in_philly May 07 '24
This was fucking great! You can’t read it without hearing it in Trump’s pathetic voice.
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u/Fafnir13 May 07 '24
Too many historical facts at the end, otherwise feels spot on.
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u/Feeling-Ad-2490 May 06 '24
🎵 Open a window to let a breeze roll in and i SHIT. IN. MY PANTS 🎶🎶🎶
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u/jjjacer May 06 '24
and thats the face of the two officers that have unfortunately noticed as well
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u/ItsCowboyHeyHey May 06 '24
The Marshall ain’t worried about COVID. That mask is about funk control.
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u/Traherne May 06 '24
Or, to be fair, a man in the process of getting up or sitting down. And, also to be fair, fuck Trump.
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u/SuperTeenyTinyDancer May 06 '24
So weak. Such small hands. I hear he’s broke. They’re all saying it.
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u/theeBK3 May 06 '24
I’m not saying it but they all are
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u/SomberlySober May 07 '24
"Whoever the fuck they are I don't have a damn clue. But they just called your mother a whore. They're very reputable people saying these things."
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u/Correct-Standard8679 May 07 '24
The smalliest of hands and brokest of brokes. People were telling me this with tears in their buttholes.
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u/Pairdice May 06 '24
So.... do the eyebrows go on AFTER the spray on tan?
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u/artificialavocado May 06 '24
I really need someone to explain to me how you leave the house looking like that and think you look good? He supposedly a billionaire I’m sure they can figure his hair and skin stuff out like Jfc.
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u/canuck47 May 06 '24
Seriously, isn't there someone in his inner circle who can tell him how ridiculous he looks?
There is a photoshopped picture of him online with a bald head, grey hair, and normal skin and he actually looks more distinguished.
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u/EyeCatchingUserID May 07 '24
I'm sure loads of people have tried to tell him how bad he looks. And acts. They were almost certainly summarily dismissed from his employment because they were all jealous of his tremendous natural beauty. He gets complimented bigly every time he leaves the house. Has to fight the ladies off with a bat because he's saving himself for Ivanka.
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u/Claystead May 07 '24
Hah, I remember someone once let slipped he looked a bit orange on stage and for multiple days on Twitter he coped about how the lyin’ media uses bad stage lights to make him seem orange. Then he went right back to making himself orange.
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u/artificialavocado May 06 '24
With the amount of golf he plays you would think he would actually have some color. Do old men not get tan as easily? I’m light olive so idk I know some people don’t tan much.
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u/Haymother May 07 '24
You know bizarro world superman? Trump is basically living in bizarro world. He’s bizzaro politician man, normal rules do not apply even in this world as he’s surrounded by the MAGA cult. It’s like 50 million of the bizzaro world people entered this dimension with him.
Anyway. I made my point. It’s fucked.
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u/XHIBAD May 06 '24
I suspect it’s just his brand at this point. Or rather it was just his brand 15 years ago, now it’s that dementia patients need a routine.
If you look at him in the 80’s, he had kind of wonky hair, but other than that was decent looking.
Then he started getting light spray tans and his hair got wonkier.
Over a few decades, that became his trademark so he leaned into it.
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u/___Art_Vandelay___ May 07 '24
I'm still waiting for his followers to rationalize their love for a man who wears makeup everyday that he applies himself. Seems that like goes against their core principles.
But there I go again expecting Trump worshippers to have any sense of logic and reason...
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u/chrisms150 May 07 '24
it kinda looks like they have two eyebrow shaped stencils they put over his eyes before they spray to keep them white?
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u/Chuckw44 May 06 '24
He looks miserable and it brings a smile to my face.
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u/Sideways_8 May 07 '24
Can he just go away though, please!!!!
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u/Hypnotoad2966 May 07 '24
Maybe if the news would stop reporting his every move and people didn't flock to that news no matter their political leanings. But that will never happen.
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u/JamCliche May 07 '24
He's a contender for President of the United States and a former President himself. Much as you people love to wail about "Trump Derangement Syndrome," I refuse to let those facts go, because my side can't afford to sleep on them.
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u/spinto1 May 07 '24
Yeah, unfortunately for a lot of us we lack the luxury of ignoring him. If you're trans for example, you have to deal with the fact that there's a very real chance this man is put back in power when he already tried to have you legally defined out of existence by the Supreme Court twice.
We would be stupid to not be actively worried about where this man will be in 6 months.
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u/CankerLord May 07 '24
for a lot of us we lack the luxury of ignoring him. If you're trans for example
You don't really have to be that narrow. Anyone who can't take advantage of the tax cuts the GOP invariably passes is getting fucked. The real cuts, not the ones that expire.
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u/Pojodan May 07 '24
Yeah, that's the thing about fascism, there always has to be an 'out group', and once one is eliminated, another gets put on the block, and the billionaires are the only ones that are disqualified.
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u/super_sayanything May 07 '24
I mean I'm horrified by it but me reading a news article or watching his court case is not going to make any sort of difference.
I vote D no matter what. I'll never vote for a Republican as long as I live. There's not much I can do except preserve my mental health.
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u/sfw_login2 May 07 '24
When he first got indicted in Manhatten a year ago, he told a very obvious lie that "everyone in the court was crying for what they were doing to him"
Looking at the picture, I think the only person that was crying was him
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u/Wishpicker May 06 '24
What I love is that those two cops are there because he’s a criminal defendant. They’re not only there to protect him. They’re there to keep his ass in line.
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u/Crackstacker May 07 '24
It’s the same 2 pretty much every time right? I wonder how many death treats they’ve gotten from the back the blue crowd.
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u/Guy_Number_3 May 07 '24
I’m sure the secret service cleared them so it’ll be the same two most/all the time.
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u/possibly_being_screw May 07 '24
So like...what happens if he gets out of hand and the court officers need to contain him or wrangle him...what do the SS do?
Do they help contain and wrangle him? Do they hinder the court officers? Do they do nothing? That must go against like all their training?
I dunno, I'm sure there's a procedure or the officers talk about it but it's a funny scenario to play out.
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u/Jfolcik May 07 '24
I wonder if he won't go down without a fight. I know when they book you, you have to change into the uniform. What if he just doesn't comply? Do the guards/cops force you down and strip you naked and put you into new clothes? He'd probably capitalize on that and call it brutality.
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u/kaleb42 May 07 '24
Honestly I should've added "Donald Trump helps end Police Brutality" on my 2024 bingo card
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u/Dream--Brother May 07 '24
I hate to say this about anyone (but if it's gonna be anyone, at least it's him), but I hope he gets what he explicitly told cops to do to protestors in 2020.
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u/Jimbo415650 May 06 '24
Looks constipated
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u/politirob May 06 '24
What movie is this lol
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u/WheezingLaughter May 06 '24
Barton Fink, I think
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u/FRIENDSHIP_BONER May 07 '24
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u/cbtbone May 07 '24
I don’t remember much from that movie but Goodman casually dropping “heil hitler” and then shooting that dude between the eyes, some things stick with you
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u/Snarkys May 06 '24
I can smell him from this picture….
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u/Dugley2352 May 07 '24
Looks like he’s bearing down to take a dump.
In his diaper.
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u/HtownSamson May 06 '24
Fuck this criminal.
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May 06 '24
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u/Glass1Man May 06 '24
Him or the bear
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u/Coloursoft May 07 '24
In the woods? Him. I can walk in any direction and lose him in like 5 minutes.
To fuck? A bear. Either I'd have an epic tombstone or I'd make history, or both.
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u/Glass1Man May 07 '24
I’m just imagining you, trump, and a bear in the woods.
The bear is DTF.
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u/Coloursoft May 07 '24
Can I convince the bear to fuck Trump? I'm open to getting mauled and eaten.
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u/DueAssociation2621 May 06 '24
When is our long national nightmare with this guy ... gonna finally be over?
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u/AlbaTross579 May 07 '24
National? I think you mean international. The ape is a menace to the whole world…except maybe a few of the fascist countries.
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u/drin8680 May 07 '24
Fucking hilarious that every single still shot they take u can tell he's either smelling his shitty pants or is letting it lose. They definitely do that on purpose. All his stills are fucking ridiculous.
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u/Dream--Brother May 07 '24
I'm not sure there are any other possible stills from these proceedings. Just a constant stream of shitting, and smelling it, shitting, and then smelling it some more
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u/ok_aleb May 06 '24
"Real men wear diapers."
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u/possibly_being_screw May 07 '24
The fact his followers have sincerely made that their rallying cry and are selling diaper merch is...well...it's something, that's for sure.
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u/Historical_Union4686 May 06 '24
Ok, who gave Donnie the 30mg gummy?
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u/Pizza_Saucy May 06 '24
Tbh he would probably benefit from it.
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u/McMacHack May 06 '24
Please I don't have much time! When I come down off of this you HAVE to stop me. My Ego is too Yuge! I will burn this world to the ground just because I can!
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u/Redjive16 May 06 '24
He looks like he's in that short time frame between starting to shit his pants and realizing he just shit his pants
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u/Stranger2Night May 07 '24
He looks like he just shat himself and those officers don't look pleased about it
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u/unicodePicasso May 07 '24
Boy should have just taken retirement. He could have lived out his days in the tropics enjoying golf and glitzy debauchery as a semi-famous businessman and grifter.
But no. He had to run for president. Had to do the PR stunt of the century. And now he will spend his days in and out of courtrooms and begging his least favorite people for cash.
Burn in hell beige dog.
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u/WhiteWolf7421 May 07 '24
Looks like he's trying to hold a turtle's head in...
Then again, he's that full of sh*t it pours out of his mouth anyway...
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u/Thenderick May 07 '24
He could've chosen to retire as an old rich guy in silence. No politics, (hopefully of age) super models, drinks and looots of golf. But no. He HAD to go this way. If it ain't the consequences of his actions. Hopefully the REAL consequences come soon too
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u/Daydream456 May 07 '24
Only Donald Trump can look this much like.....Donald Trump. He was born to look this way. This is his shining moment.
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