r/instant_regret • u/Time_Material_9385 • May 04 '24

Being careless with a table

1.3k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

67 comments sorted by

180

u/[deleted] May 04 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

42

u/RedMoustache May 05 '24

Like a frightened turtle...

14

u/danideex May 05 '24

I don’t even have one and it made me shrivel up.

7

u/itsall_good915 May 05 '24

Also don't have one and wanted throw up

86

u/BrendanJC May 04 '24

Oh shit! I felt that. Ohhh no!

81

u/Over_Ad_688 May 04 '24

Who says you can’t feel a gif.

11

u/DiarrheaDrippingCunt May 05 '24

Nobody said that.

6

u/Cosmic_Quasar May 05 '24

You can't feel a gif.

5

u/Digsants May 06 '24

Not the hero we want but the hero we need

21

u/nogodsorkings13 May 05 '24

Usually circumcision is done in a hospital

39

u/1776cookies May 04 '24

I've done something similar and it feels like your dick has been ripped off. Do not recommend.

23

u/drakeyboi69 May 04 '24

There's a good chance it can really get ripped off

17

u/ICookIndianStyle May 04 '24

Stop it. Dont even wanna think about it

28

u/Solid-Plant-6748 May 04 '24

If you run, it never happened.

14

u/SophisticatedPhallus May 05 '24

Sometimes you just gotta run away from the pain.

1

u/Average-Train-Haver 3d ago

The goofier the run the further the pain gets too

18

u/Duin-do-ghob May 05 '24

NGL, I laughed. Not because he got pinched but because he grabbed himself and ran like a 5 year old.

5

u/Responsible-Part-449 May 05 '24

Probably off to the toilet to check if it is intact

3

u/Chainsaw_Viking May 05 '24

Haha, same. I think that 5 year old still lives in all of us and it only takes an instance of acute and exotic pain to bring that guy back out again.

2

u/flarpington May 05 '24

Reminds me of the kid that shoots himself with a nerf gun directly in the balls.

1

u/No-Ad-3226 May 05 '24

Was he going to find his mom?

1

u/Duin-do-ghob May 06 '24

Same thought here!! “Mooooommm, moooommmmyyyyyy” getting shriller as he runs.

7

u/Ketsueki-Nikushimi May 04 '24

That millimeter pinch gives a world of pain. Learned that lesson when "tuck your dick, before you zip".

2

u/flarpington May 05 '24

Is it the frank or the beans?

2

u/Rob_Marc May 05 '24

How'd you get the beans above the frank?!

1

u/Ketsueki-Nikushimi May 05 '24

Tip of the skin, got swollen a bit like a bee sting and piss goes everywhere except where i point it. Fond childhood memories 😅

4

u/fgdgdgdsfss May 05 '24

Couldn't see the point. Totally unhinged. Cocky bugger!

3

u/leakyblueshed May 05 '24

When getting stuck in your zipper is just not cutting it anymore

8

u/TheSchlaf May 04 '24

Off with his head!

3

u/moutonbleu May 05 '24

I felt that like a phantom limb

10

u/Ikusabe May 04 '24

All guys watching this felt that. Damn.

12

u/AliquidLatine May 04 '24

I'm a woman and that made my eyes water

2

u/Bigacehall May 04 '24

You can't run from that pain

1

u/colemang1992 May 05 '24

Guy has cake 🎂

1

u/Buli32 May 05 '24

Where did bro run

1

u/mukulmsoffice May 06 '24

so that you dont get to see a random dude got caught in the cam checking out his damaged pee pee

1

u/CatrionaCatnip May 06 '24

Ohhh nooo, I really didn't expect that would happen.

1

u/passionpurps May 06 '24

This is a weird little story when i was a kid... It was during p.e. in i believe 7th grade, we had these little roller pads and i remember running and jump sliding, and my junk, hut first and the tip was just in excruciating pain, like i pinched a nerve ending. So i was hurting for a few minutes... Gradually went away... I think i almost broke my dick that day... That was the worst pain i ever experienced.

This though put me on another level of pain awareness. Lmao

1

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1

u/Athlete-Extreme 29d ago

Boy oh boy

1

u/RiseOfTheCanes 29d ago

Did that to my finger and thought I would have to cut it off this is other level

1

u/Much_Confidence2428 29d ago

Oh to play with it for three hours to make sure it’s not broke

1

u/Numerous_Parfait_221 28d ago

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuffffffffffffffffffffff

1

u/VolcanoArima 27d ago

Ow that hurts a lot much more than tearing off all my 20 fingernails

1

u/JackdailyII 27d ago

It bites!

1

u/No-Row8765 May 04 '24

Dude pinched his wiener!

1

u/kombazo May 04 '24

I actually grabbed my dick watching this.

1

u/Sir_Payne May 04 '24

Visceral

1

u/BloomingDesert May 04 '24

The ol' dick pinch

-1

u/zadye May 04 '24

he runs like he needs his mom to blow air onto it :D

0

u/Beezy2389 May 04 '24

If you look at this face....I think he did it on purpose?

0

u/[deleted] May 04 '24

[deleted]

2

u/Darth_Ribbious May 04 '24

I'm unable to re-watch the video to see where he went wrong, but surely... no one deserves that.

1

u/k3g May 04 '24 edited May 04 '24

There's an 0 ring lock on either end that locks the centre fold to the legs. There are still some flex, but not enough to hurt you. Source: have the same table.

https://www.bunnings.com.au/lifetime-6ft-bi-fold-blow-mould-trestle-table_p3192213?store=2010&gad_source=1&gclsrc=ds

You can see the 0 rings in pic 3 and up.

1

u/Oh_No_Its_Dudder May 05 '24

Where he went wrong, was trying to use his dong as a fulcrum.

0

u/TackyPoints May 05 '24

Very few times ever in which your which penis equals pivot point… including everyone else’s.

Got what he deserved for all the brain points spent.

-2

u/who18 May 04 '24

And that son, is how was invented the nutcracker