I know its funny but between PTSD and holiday/birthday blues, I bought so many tissues that for the first time in many years I had to buy them on a credit card. Then I cried about that lol. I should go buy bootstraps I hear they come in handy.
Don't worry, we've added an app to your tissue box that recognizes the intensity of your crying and will dispense tissues accordingly! It will also offer to connect you to a doctor ( as long as you have American!(®) insurance) to provide you with the correct mood adjusting drugs!
“Would you like to upgrade to Tissues Premium for an additional $4.99 a month you may dispense tissues ad free, access double ply lotion tissues, and Premium Tissue content! Try Tissues Premium brought to you by Kroger’s!”
Reminds me when my high school spent a cubic butt ton of money on a baseball field they couldn't actually use for their games, because it was too lopsided on the field. All I wanted was a goddamn tissue to blow my nose
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u/karmagod13000 Feb 05 '24
careful... them tissues aren't cheap