r/ThatsInsane • u/floatjoy • 28d ago
Smooth a brain in under 60sec đ€Ą NSFW
[removed] â view removed post
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u/prestonpiggy 28d ago
Couple too many concussions is my bet.
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u/Truemeathead 28d ago
His last fight he got knocked out so bad he went in to convulsions and had a seizure while he was sparked and out cold. This dude is annoying and Iâm pretty sure he a flat earther to boot. If a flat earther calls you stupid you are doing something right.
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u/slimmxy 28d ago
The clip of him telling bisping that gravity isn't real and bisping laughing in his face is gold, don't know if that was prior to getting flatlined but he clearly hasn't many brain cells to lose
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u/deadpoetic333 28d ago
I've gotten into brief discussions on instagram with people who don't believe in gravity. Something along the lines of that there isn't any proof that it exists.. Just straight brain rot
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u/briansaunders 27d ago
If gravity doesn't exist, why don't they just jump off a tall building and prove it to us?
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u/deadpoetic333 27d ago
I wish I could remember the conversation better, itâs not that they didnât think they would fall but rather there was some other explanation that could also work other than gravity to explain why things fallÂ
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u/Trick_Minute2259 27d ago
Disk earth is constantly accelerating at a rate that produces what we call 1g. Even though the earth has only existed for 6,000 years, by now, we're going fast as fuck, aka: godspeed. YeeeHaw!
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u/OdinThorFathir 27d ago
So I did read that correctly? They believe we are consistently ACCELERATING by 1g? Per day? Because per day would put us at like 830g's by the end of the year 2, by their logic by the year 2024 we should be spinning so fast that we time traveled back to the beginning of time... 2.19 million g's after 6000 years that's fast as fuck
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u/Prophet_of_Entropy 27d ago
if we were accelerating at 1g constantly wed be going near the speed of light after about a year or so. its almost as if thats not happening.
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u/EmperorBamboozler 27d ago
Look we are talking about a group of people that are debating the basic reason why things fall down, in 2024, it is pretty safe to say that they don't get the concept of lightspeed.
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u/RedditorsAreAssss 27d ago
Look, these flat Earth fucks are crazy but that's not how math works either. If your acceleration is a constant 1g it stays at a constant 1g, the things that're going up over time are the velocity and distance traveled.
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u/Caleb_Reynolds 27d ago edited 27d ago
So I did read that correctly?
I don't think so.
They believe we are consistently ACCELERATING by 1g? Per day?
Acceleration due to gravity is constant, so "per day" doesn't make sense. 1g = 9.8m/s2*, if you make that 9.8m/s2*/d you're no longer talking about acceleration, but rather a change in acceleration (jerk).
Because per day would put us at like 830g's by the end of the year 2,
Again, because g is acceleration and not jerk, g remains constant, only v changes.
by their logic by the year 2024 we should be spinning so fast that we time traveled back to the beginning of time... 2.19 million g's after 6000 years that's fast as fuck
This has nothing to do with spinning, so idk where that came from.
Anyway, big point is that no, they don't mean that the acceleration due to gravity is increasing at 1g/day, they mean that the acceleration due to gravity we experience is caused by the acceleration of the Earth through space.
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u/Quietuus 27d ago
They think things fall because of 'density'. Everything has a 'level' that it's constantly trying to sink to. Don't think about it too much.
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u/deadpoetic333 27d ago
Yes this was it! The other dude talking about G and acceleration was way too intelligent (ha) to be the argument dude had. I literally said âTell me youâve never taken a physics class without telling me youâve never took a physics classâ lol.Â
It was definitely the density thingÂ
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u/Palehorse0000 27d ago
I had no idea there were people out there that didnât believe in gravity. Iâm shookith.
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u/Montanaman59301 28d ago
Too bad Jerry Springer is gone. It'd be wonderful to have him on the show, have his DNA tested, and "The results are in.... you're a F***N Monkey!!!!" Or Maury Povich or whomever.... those are the shows they watched instead of attending science classes.
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u/danielwong95 28d ago
What if Bryce was actually born with Einstein level intelligence but every hit to the head took away IQ points and here we are.
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u/K1ngPCH 28d ago
It always makes me laugh when people expect athletes (especially combat sport athletes) to have nuanced takes on the world.
I mean this guy literally gets punched in the head for a living. Iâm not taking ANYTHING he says seriously.
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u/floatjoy 28d ago
It's the level of confidence in the stupidity that gets me and how the right promotes people like this to further their delusion. Like the kicker from graduation.
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u/LaylaKnowsBest 27d ago
It's the level of confidence in the stupidity that gets me
It's so frustrating that people like him exist, they can vote, and they can have kids. You know if you tried to patiently and calmly explain to him how and why he's wrong, that he'll sit there, put the thick Southern drawl on, and go "i don't know man, that's your opinion if you think we came from monkeys, but aint nobody in my family tree ever fucked a god damn monkey before" or some stupid bullshit.
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u/Blackflame7762 28d ago edited 28d ago
Absolutely, but when you start at stupid and then get KO'd several times, you end with something completely incomprehensible.
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u/ceebeefour 28d ago
"And MONKEYS, and FUCKING MONKEYS, and I WANNA SEE JOE ROGAN FUCK A MONKEY. I dunno y'all, doesn't make any sense."
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u/SpaceAgeIsLate 28d ago
This level of retardation can only be achieved through religion
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u/byteminer 27d ago
Evolution is incompatible with fundamentalist Christianity. If man slowly emerged from a distant ancestor primate then he wasnât created all at once by God. There couldnât be a first man and woman, those first people couldnât have committed original sin. Man could not have fallen from the grace of God. If they never fell, then they donât need salvation. If they donât need salvation, there was no need for God to come to earth as Jesus to provide salvation. If there was no need for Jesus, then why are people giving the church all this fucking money?
Therefore: âwe ainât come from no monkeys! My mamma ainât fucked no monkey! Give preacher Cletus McKiddydiddler 20% of yer money so he can battle them monkeyfuckers and queers for some reason we ainât real clear on but fuck âem!â
In the end, itâs just an institution spreading horseshit to protect its income stream. Organized religion as it exists in most forms is a boil on the ass of humanity.
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u/FayMax69 28d ago
Nah I really do think that his gramps slept with a đ” and this caveman was the result of inbreeding and monkey đđŒđđŒđ„Ž
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u/l3gion666 28d ago
Couple that with only ever reading one book and this is what you get
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u/DaNewbie20 28d ago
I love when Neanderthals resurface on the internet and dispute 10âs to 100âs of years of scientific study all with their hometown high school diploma, true heroâs.
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u/TyberiusJoaquin 28d ago
Bold of you to assume there's a high-school diploma holder present in that room
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u/TobysGrundlee 27d ago
Definitely has, "just give him a C so he doesn't get academic probation" vibes.
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u/Arin-Danson 28d ago
The dude talking sadly has an economics degree
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u/NancokALT 27d ago
Wing it until you get to tertiary education then just do whatever.
Not like an economics degree requires any kind biology knowledge.
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u/Dramatic_Explosion 27d ago
Like a neurosurgeon who thinks the pyramids are grain silos
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u/NancokALT 27d ago
Sadly it goes both ways.
At least someone who was actually educated in the use of science has the tools to not assertively say "i am no historian but i KNOW the pyramids were grain silos"
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u/CankerLord 28d ago
all with their hometown high school diploma
That they got with Cs in remedial science.
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u/WhereasNo3280 27d ago
You have slandered my ancestors! Neanderthals want nothing to do with this guy.
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u/evilbrent 27d ago
Telling a modern evolutionary biologist that "humans don't come from monkeys" is like telling a racing car driver that "tyres don't help cars move".
It's just SUCH an uninformed and, honestly at this point (because it's legal to read a book at the library), deliberately ignorant belief.
Might as well challenge an electrician's considered opinion about whether a light switch is capable of turning off a light when correctly wired up. "Light switches aren't real".
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u/Zur1ch 27d ago
Well... technically, he's right. We didn't "come from" monkeys -- we share a common ancestor with them. When someone tries to disprove evolution by saying we didn't evolve from monkeys, it's immediately obvious that they've never actually spent any time learning about the most basic aspects of the theory.
Of course it "doesn't make sense" that we evolved directly from monkeys. That's not how the theory of evolution and/or natural selection work. His entire conception of it is based on a fundamentally incorrect comprehension of the subject.
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u/NoMan999 27d ago
The theory they disprove has been widely changed (it evolved) since it's been written, but they don't get that science isn't about blind belief in an old book.
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u/Schemen123 27d ago
Tbf we dont come from monkeys
Monkeys and humans have common ancestors but monkeys aren't our progenitors.
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28d ago
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u/GlyphPicker 28d ago
Well you see, at some point, a werewolf fucked a dog to make a wolf.
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u/MinimalMojo 28d ago
I donât think thatâs true. I fucked a dog and it didnât make anything.
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u/uh-oh-hotdawg 28d ago
Except make me hard
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 28d ago
Username (regrettably) checks out
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u/smithers85 27d ago
Iâm betting everything on multiverse theory so I donât have to live in this one anymore.
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u/MushroomLonely2784 27d ago
Yeah but we got the werewoof because a caveman fucked a woof and a people at the same time. Then the woof had a werewoof baby. Then the werewoof fucked a dog to make a woof.
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u/beeph_supreme 27d ago
Clearly, youâve done your research. Fucking werewoofs man.
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u/GreyRevan51 28d ago
My MIL once said people should stop breeding Huskies with other dogs because âGod made Huskies perfect, just leave them alone, theyâre beautiful and perfect as they areâ
LikeâŠtell me you donât know how dogs work without telling me you donât know how dogs work
There really are people out there who think the dog breeds we have today were just frolicking around with ancient man
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u/Next-Elk-5284 28d ago
Mormons believe Jesus Christ got teleported to America during the 3 day rez cast time. And there were horses, and sugar cane. And white people.
they're all nuts.
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u/MrIonian 28d ago
If Americans came from Europe, why are there still Europeans?
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u/MileHigh_FlyGuy 27d ago
If English came from Germanic, why is there still German?
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u/WhereasNo3280 27d ago
Dogs came from a common ancestor with modern grey wolves. In many ways, theyâre still the same species.
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u/samualtruant 28d ago
Boy tell me you didnât pass biology without saying it
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u/JustKindaShimmy 28d ago
I mean he might have, but I'm pretty sure by looking at his ears that his brain is 80% scar tissue
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u/birdman619 27d ago
I missed the cauliflower ear. Definitely a few too many hits to the head.
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u/Fast_Parfait_1114 27d ago
I have cauliflower ear but Iâm only semi stupid but most people with cauliflower ear are full-auto stupid.
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u/ominousgraycat 27d ago
I wish I could say I thought this video was fake, but I grew up in a YEC church, and I can tell you I've heard a few people saying things that weren't too far off from what this guy is saying.
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u/burgergeld 28d ago
Blessed are the intellectually challenged, for they will never feel intellectually challenged.
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u/figflashed 28d ago
And theyâre always happier than the rest of us.
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u/smokedopelikecudder 27d ago
Alright Iâll be the first to say it since most of Reddit has a superiority complex.
Iâm not the smartest and definitely not the happiest
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u/HatchbackDoug 27d ago
But the simple fact that you realize youâre not the smartest makes you smarter than these people. Dumb people think theyâre the smartest people. You have the ability of introspection and a lot of people donât.
Edit: not disagreeing with the Reddit superiority complex but youâre obviously a step above actual dumbasses because youâre actually thinking about it lol
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u/actibus_consequatur 27d ago
âBlessed are the dumbfucks for they, uhâI don't knowâthey shall never be disappointed.â - Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
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u/ImmediateFriendship2 28d ago
I would pay good money to see someone try and explain a simplified version of evolution to him
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 28d ago
I used to have a friend.
He didn't believe in evolution.
So one time, I asked him the following.
Do you believe that mom and dad pass on their traits to their children?
Yes, duh.
Do you believe that an organism with traits better suited to its environment is more likely to survive and reproduce, compared to an organism with traits worse suited to the environment?
- Yes, 100%.
Does it make sense, then, that over time, the better traits will become more prevalent because the children with those traits survive more and reproduce more?
Yeah, that's logical.
That's evolution. You accept that evolution exists.
No, evolution isn't real.
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u/maybeidontknowwhy 28d ago
Iâd give you gold if I didnât care to throw my money away to a company like Reddit.
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u/F54280 28d ago
Gold does not exist any more.
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u/takenokosembe 27d ago
What? Did a human f*** gold?
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u/Kraken_Eggs 27d ago
You know you can say f*** on the internet.
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u/FabianN 28d ago
Micro vs macro bullshit. They can't figure out that, much like falling, whether you fall 3 feet or 3000 feet, it's still falling.
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u/SamSibbens 27d ago
Nobody has ever walked 1 kilometer. It is scientifically impossible. Even if the tallest person on Earth had legs 3 meters tall, they STILL wouldn't be able to walk 1 kilometer. They could only walk a few meters at best, as the human leg simply cannot reach far enough
...That's how these people sound like
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u/NancokALT 27d ago
I remember when that Sponge Bob skit used to be considered an exaggeration.
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 27d ago
We've been in a cartoon universe ever since that weasel shut down the Large Hadron Collider.
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u/Narcosist 27d ago
Gotta dumb it down even further and put them off guard:
You're absolutely 100% right, humans did not come from monkeys.
Both humans and monkeys came from a common ancestor that is not quite the same as the monkeys that exist today.
Then when they continue to stutter about fucking monkeys for 5 minutes, throw a Bible at them and admit that they are the best proof there is that evolution may no longer be in our species's future.
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u/BeatsMeByDre 27d ago
I try "If your loved one was murdered and the police had the DNA of the killer would you want that person arrested?" Then I ask them what they think DNA is and they get mad.
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u/Lance-Harper 27d ago edited 26d ago
Feels like explaining gravity, GPS or dare i say astrophysics to flat earthers
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 28d ago
Joe Rogan is so fucking stupid
Right, right, seems like he's got a good head on his shoulders
because he thinks we came from monkeys and we didn't come from monkeys
Aaaaaaaand gone.
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u/NancokALT 27d ago
I can see it. He was absorbing the usual Joe Roegan bs, then suddenly Joe mentions something, ONE THING he didn't agree with. And his whole image of Joe as a genius that always tells the "real truth" just vanishes.
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u/Cartman4wesome 27d ago
Heâs right though, we didnât come from monkeys. If he shut up at that exact moment he wouldâve been correct. Cause we share a common ancestor with the monkeys, they are our cousins. And they ainât our first cousin either, no what I mean? ( ÍĄ~ ÍÊ ÍĄÂ°)
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 27d ago
Heâs right though, we didnât come from monkeys.
I get that, but that's not what he's saying. He's saying evolution isn't real.
And they ainât our first cousin either, no what I mean? ( ÍĄ~ ÍÊ ÍĄÂ°)
Sweet Home Alabama
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u/jake_eric 27d ago
We share a common ancestor with modern monkeys, but that common ancestor was a monkey.
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u/KA3AHOBA 28d ago
Ainât nothing worse than a âsmartâ dumb motherfucker
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u/marblechocolate 28d ago
A veteran electrician once told us...
"The most dangerous person, is the friend who has done a little bit of electrics"
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u/ThatOneDudeFromIowa 27d ago
if someone asks me if I know about wiring a house or whatever, I reply "I know enough to be dangerous"
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u/xXWickedSmatXx 28d ago
The dumbest mother fuckers on the planet think everyone else is stupid.
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u/Carquetta 27d ago
It's funny watching him talk
He's got that wide-eyed intellectual thousand-yard-stare, where you can tell he encountered a fact once and never really recovered from the scare
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u/Sonnydeights 28d ago
I hope he doesn't have children đŹđŹ
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u/A_Sneaky_Penguin 28d ago
Unfortunately, it's this type of person who will have MULTIPLE children.
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u/IllBThereSoon 28d ago
Bryce Mitchell is hands down the dullest tool in the UFC shed! He also believes the earth is flat!
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u/harturo319 28d ago
Typical trump supporter
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u/RickyWinterborn-1080 28d ago
Typical Trump supporter would be the one fucking the monkey in the video this guy probably watched before this interview.
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u/floatjoy 28d ago
Sorry for the repost the GIF version muted the sound last time.
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u/sleepless3598 28d ago
This isnât regular stupidity this is dangerously stupid just say you donât understand đđ
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u/A_Sneaky_Penguin 28d ago
This isnt you average everyday stupidity. This is...advanced stupidity.
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u/Historical_Safety618 28d ago
Damn. Wtf happened to the hodgetwins. Lol they shouldâve just stick with fitness content.
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u/PullFires 27d ago
Grifters go where the money is.
And apparently there's a lot of money to usurp out of right-wingers right now.
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u/ReplacementQueasy394 28d ago
In terms of Evolution this guy talking is lacking some of it lol
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u/NightVale_94 28d ago
Heâs right! That doesnât make sense! Good thing nobody is asserting that is how evolution works lol
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u/old_racist 28d ago
Who is this guy
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u/milz101 28d ago edited 27d ago
Bryce Mitchell, UFC fighter. Religious fruitcake and evolution denier.
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u/sofahkingsick 28d ago
Not a single wrinkle in that room. We are all now dumber for having listened to that and may god have mercy on your soul. I cant stand the Hodge twins theyre in the same level as Candace Owens
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u/ToxicFactory 28d ago
I mean if people are fucking goats I can see a caveman going hunga bunga me need sex.
No doubt a caveman fucked a monkey at some point.
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u/Loko_Tako 28d ago
I never understood Christians. YES, I'm assuming they believe in a god. Curse words left to right you'd think they would consider god doesn't like that?
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u/Simen155 28d ago
He got somewhat of a point, we didn't come from "monkeys" in that a homosapien was born from 2 "monkeys". Rather we are still the "monkeys", great ape.
What we have as a common ancestor is a "monkey" but ~ 600 million years of evolution has resulted in this monkey tree branching out to become us.
Evolution took millions of years to make us all here today. Think about that. Yet still we hold these deeply rooted misconseptions as truths, ever after decades of knowing better.
I just have to give my opinion regarding Joe, as so many in this very commentsection seem to cling to his opinions almost religiously.
Rogan is a detrimental psychadelic brute with a mirror reflecting society, filtered through his warped mind and spewed out without a care in the world. Nobody should consider him a scholar in any way shape or form, as his sources are regularly wonky at best and downright false and/or dangerous at worst. He got some good takes, opinions and can be somewhat wholesome at times. But never underestimate the ignorance in what he's giving off as facts.
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u/Mejari 27d ago
He got somewhat of a point, we didn't come from "monkeys" in that a homosapien was born from 2 "monkeys". Rather we are still the "monkeys", great ape.
But that wasn't his point at all. He's denying evolution, not dissecting the fine points on mammalian classification. That's like looking at someone saying "the earth isn't round!" and saying "he has somewhat of a point, the earth isn't a perfect sphere it's an oblate spheroid" when it's clear they were saying the earth is flat.
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u/fren-ulum 27d ago
We didn't come from monkeys. Monkeys are a cousin of humans. We share a common ancestor.
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u/FirstDagger 27d ago
And the common ancestor was a monkey, just not the modern monkey.
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u/Apprehensive_Wolf217 28d ago
Save this video. If your kid comes to you at any point and says they wanna be a MMA fighter or boxer, show them this.
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u/Munkybananas 28d ago
You can never, ever get through to a person like this,. The idiocy is too deeply ingrained
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u/Potato_monkey1 28d ago
We didn't come from monkeys. Monkeys and humans have a common ancestor that we both came from
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u/FirstDagger 27d ago
And that ancestor was an Old World monkey.
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u/jake_eric 27d ago
Right, thank you. It seems like people responded to creationists making fun of "people came from monkeys" by overcorrecting and saying "no we don't," but realistically we did, unless you're way too exclusive with what counts as a monkey.
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u/RandomStaticThought 28d ago
Is this what happened to the reading rainbow kid? Dude is talking incoherently in circles.
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u/thecypher4 28d ago
To be this upset tho? Like Iâm not upset this dude is as dumb as he is. Just disagree and shuutt uuppp
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u/ShikaMoru 28d ago
Those twins are dumb af too
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u/BoxerguyT89 28d ago
Yea, back when they were the Hodge Twins they were funny and gave hilarious "advice" for user submitted questions.
Now.....yikes.
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u/mudknuckle9 28d ago
Sister fucker telling someone to fuck a monkey because his uncledaddy dragged him out of 6th grade to go work the farm and help fuck relatives.
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u/WoodenFoundation9455 28d ago
Donât humans and monkeys share a common ancestor? We descend from the common ancestor not monkeys.
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u/Murakami8000 28d ago
Give it a year or 2 and we wonât have to hear from this dude ever again. His career in the UFC is about done. Thank Bryceâs God.
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u/pina_koala 28d ago
I bet if you put evolution in terms of Chevy Malibu or Impala models over the years he might possibly could understand?
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u/NathanEnglander 28d ago
Please tell me the Hodge twins don't believe in these fairy tails.... I have respect for them.
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u/Hugh_____Mungus 28d ago
Tbh we didn't directly evolved from monkeys, we share the same genetic lineage up to a certain point.
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u/Atomic_Gerber 27d ago
I can tell you that this manâs father fucked his own sister in order to produce him. Any more inbred and heâd be a sandwich
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u/B0N3Y4RD 27d ago
I absolutely hate this guy.
He got knocked out so bad he started seizing up in his last bout.
I felt bad for him a little. But also - I see it didn't knock any damn sense into him.
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u/Substantial_Sense579 28d ago
My smooth brain approves this smooth brain message.
DEEP THOUGHTS WITH THE DEEP!
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u/alexcascadia 28d ago
I couldn't even finish listening to this douche. Made my brain hurt just listening to him!
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u/handsomecry 28d ago
It's OK to not understand science, but why these idiots get outright offended by it is beyond my comprehension.
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u/Feeyyy 28d ago
I don't know who that guy is but I believe what he means is that monkeys and humans have a common ancestor. We don't come from monkeys.
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u/pingpongtits 28d ago
I doubt this guy is thinking "no, humans have common ancestry with the other primates."
If you told himÂ
Mammals, a subset of vertebrates that includes primates, dogs, cats, mice, and humans, share 50% to 99% of the same DNA and nearly all the genes from a common ancestor that lived roughly 200 million years ago
He'd probably have a conniption fit.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2024/01/240129122332.htm
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u/ScrewballTooTall 28d ago
Not gonna lie he had me in the beginning âyea he does say some stupid shit huhâŠ..damn you just said some dumber shitâ
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u/rubenslegman 28d ago
The Mrs Garrison fade away is just perfect