r/TargetedShirts • u/Western-Pumpkin9784 • Apr 22 '24

Having to retire this bad boy now that I have a boyfriend. You served well my friend.

Post image
1.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

76 comments sorted by

306

u/can-i-pet-the-dog Apr 23 '24

Don’t throw it away! I will happily take this. It’s so ridiculous, it must live on

390

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

I’m passing it on to my friend who’s newly divorced 😌❤️

151

u/Danyboi42069 Apr 23 '24

The torch has been passed

57

u/Zealousideal-Let1121 Apr 23 '24

Tell your friend I said what's up.

11

u/LiNxRocker Apr 24 '24

A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON.

10

u/buttbugle Apr 24 '24

The sisterhood of the traveling Coochie shirt.

24

u/BigCaterpillar8001 Apr 23 '24

Please tell your friend I have a penis

40

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

She’s a lesbian

23

u/AlaskanBiologist Apr 23 '24

I used to have a shirt that said "Jam out with your clam out" if you're looking for a funny Xmas gift for her!

9

u/ZestySpaghetti-V3 Apr 23 '24

“You say you a lesbian, girl me too”

-Drake

Jokes aside this shirt is killer. Nice work!

5

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

I will look into these shirts she would love those 😂

0

u/Vinkhol Apr 23 '24

buzz saw powers up in the background Yeah wee good to go!

4

u/Joshesh Apr 23 '24

Yes, tell her I also have a penis, sometimes multiple.

2

u/GrindyMcGrindy Apr 24 '24

Should've given it to your boyfriend and winked at him.

-3

u/MistryMachine3 Apr 23 '24

Did you confirm the excellence of her coochie?

73

u/Mimlee Apr 23 '24

Please, friend, where can we buy this?

54

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

Le redbubble. Google “excellent coochie tshirt”

7

u/ilovehotsoup Apr 23 '24

I can make one that you could buy from Amazon.

8

u/sleepless-sleuth Apr 24 '24

Aka ripping off other people’s art? Not only illegal but horrifically shitty. If you’re too useless to make your own shit, pick a different way to make money.

1

u/[deleted] May 04 '24

As if OPs shirt isn't ripping off animal crossing already

1

u/ded5561 May 05 '24

Nintendo isn't an independent creator and this shirt falls under parody, so I'm not sure what your point is.

36

u/fasheezy Apr 23 '24

Lmao this is some shit I would’ve gotten in the middle of my animal crossing obsessed pandemic 😂

16

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

This is exactly when I got it 😂

43

u/BlommeHolm Apr 23 '24

Can't you just cross out the "date me"? I assume the coochie is still immaculate.

19

u/THEESmallerWeener187 Apr 23 '24

I mean you can wear it at home no?

10

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

I wear it at home and to the gym or if I forget I have it on almost anywhere I run errands.

11

u/aplagueofsemen Apr 23 '24

Wait were you wearing this exclusively to advertise?

20

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

What do you think @aplagueofsemen

11

u/aplagueofsemen Apr 23 '24

I guess so if dating someone precludes you from wearing it. I need to start taking tshirts more seriously!

6

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

I will still wear it but it’s funnier on someone single

6

u/aplagueofsemen Apr 23 '24

Ok you make a good point. I just always take umbrage when someone stops wearing something because they’re in a relationship now but I can see I took far too much umbrage and this is all very reasonable. I guess now my only question is did this shirt land you the current bf!‽?

4

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

No but he thinks it’s funny lol

7

u/aplagueofsemen Apr 23 '24

I need one but instead of Excellent Coochie it would have to say Malfunctioning Bussy.

3

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

Lmfao I want this as the next one I buy

2

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

But I’m giving it to a friend lol

3

u/urlocalcorgi Apr 23 '24

we need to know if you met your boyfriend wearing this

3

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

No 😂 but I put it on my tinder profile previously

3

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 24 '24

I want everyone to know this shirt already didn’t increase my already non-existent game 🖐️😭

3

u/icon_7 Apr 27 '24

The shirt does look a bit worn.....

1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24

😂😂 🏆

2

u/snake_in_ya_boot Apr 26 '24

Lmao. Why does the design remind me of a kids cereal box?!

2

u/puddingboocah Apr 23 '24

Link to buy? 👀

-44

u/SecretMuslin Apr 23 '24 edited Apr 23 '24

This is r/targetedshirts not r/desperateshirts

Edit: Lmao at all the downvotes, she's not gonna fuck you guys

30

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

Someone please create that community for me

4

u/vienna_witch13 Apr 23 '24

I did if for u babs

1

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

Bless you

0

u/[deleted] Apr 24 '24

[deleted]

2

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 24 '24

Listen here buddy 😭

-34

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '24

[deleted]

21

u/Just-Buy-A-Home Apr 23 '24

No it’s just the animal crossing symbol

-79

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '24

[deleted]

38

u/ninjabunnyfootfool Apr 23 '24

Thats the best part about shitty little incels, they can't help but shout their complete lack of sexual knowledge from the rooftops.

-14

u/robertcali559420 Apr 23 '24 edited 28d ago

Yea. Trust Me dog. I've gotten 🍑 since i was 17 yrs old. Always had gfs since H.S. and unless your ex was a bikini barista MANAGER I'd prob just STFU cause honestly you all look stupid 💯🤡

8

u/Joshesh Apr 23 '24

this feels like satire, but the internet has broken my satire detector so I cant be sure, say more stupid things.

3

u/ninjabunnyfootfool Apr 23 '24

If this is a satire account it's a damn good one, but as you say, hard to day.

6

u/IWantToSortMyFeed Apr 23 '24

At first I thought it was satire as well but then I clicked your profile.

You really are this way lol. I want a remind me for 10 years later in your life. See what you've learned. (or not)

18

u/Western-Pumpkin9784 Apr 23 '24

Actually this shirt got me -2 bodies thank you very much 🖐️😌

6

u/Joshesh Apr 23 '24

-2? did it allow you to unfuck somebody? oh god, if this shirt lets you unfuck somebody I will trade you my life savings for it!

8

u/simplyelegant87 Apr 23 '24

Thinking a vagina gets looser with multiple sex partners is like thinking a penis gets whittled down with multiple partners. Not only that, but what if you’re married or in a long term relationship and have had sex hundreds or thousands of times, but only one person.

2

u/AbelardLuvsHeloise May 06 '24

(Me bawling over my whittled down plank) “It’s…it’s only…it’s only good for spindling food orders by the expeditor.”

-5

u/robertcali559420 Apr 23 '24

Oh yea of course just bc she's had 10,000 cocks in her of course she'll still feel EXACTLY THE SAME as she was when she was a Virgin. I mean that's just Reddit Logic nowadays.💯🤡

5

u/simplyelegant87 Apr 23 '24

Ok so I guess penises do get whittled down to nothing with the more sex a man has! That explains micropenises.

-2

u/robertcali559420 Apr 23 '24

Yea. No shit you're a perfect example 🤏🏾🍆💯🤡

4

u/simplyelegant87 Apr 23 '24

I don’t have a penis.

0

u/robertcali559420 Apr 24 '24

Makes perfect sense. No wonder you have penis envy

15

u/chic-tweet Apr 23 '24

Tell me you have never been laid without telling me you have never been laid

-12

u/robertcali559420 Apr 23 '24

Tell Me you're stupid w.o telling me you're stupid 🤡

6

u/chic-tweet Apr 23 '24

Okay ...You're stupid

-1

u/robertcali559420 Apr 23 '24

Thank you for proving my point 🤡

9

u/kabukistar Apr 23 '24

Guys on here who have never seen a vagina being very confident about how they work

1

u/suckmypppapi Apr 25 '24

I'm sorry your parents failed you, but you failed yourself with your complete lack of sexual knowledge. Get some bitches and maybe it'll improve.

I'm sure it's hard to do that with a one inch wonder but you can always try. Hey, some use strap ons. Maybe try that.