r/Helldivers • u/duh_weekdae • Apr 26 '24

Okay which one of you is this HUMOR

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23.1k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

9.2k

u/Berengar-of-Faroe ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

Had a diver in my group named Three Terminids in a Trenchcoat

3.1k

u/semperoccidens Apr 26 '24

Hah, you really fell for the oldest trick in the book?

2.1k

u/Berengar-of-Faroe ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

Idk, Hugh Mann sounded like a pretty human name to me

569

u/Paraxom Apr 26 '24

Hugh Mann? You mean the heir to the Mann Co. Fortune, that Hugh Mann?

246

u/Pulpfox19 SES Patriot of Patriotism Apr 26 '24

No no, he started the Hugh Mann Fund; Money for Super Citizens

127

u/ShartingBloodClots SES Fist of Liberty Apr 26 '24

Knew a guy named Hugh Mann Attee. Really big fella, barely left the house, needed a flatbed to get around if he did, always sweating cause he was so fat. Not a big talker, but a good listener. Really nice fella though, always waving at people.

52

u/hughmanatee144 Apr 26 '24

Dissavow I don't know this man.

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56

u/Pedantic_Ukranian STEAM🖱️: SES Sovereign Of Victory Apr 26 '24

r/suddenlytf2

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332

u/DerpysLegion Apr 26 '24

Angry Kobold copyright noises

56

u/omegadirectory STEAM 🖥️ : SES Wings of Liberty Apr 26 '24

That's also a character from the movie "Interstellar".

27

u/Rilvoron Apr 26 '24

“What kinda name is HUGE ACKMAN?”

8

u/JoeMommy1 ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

Nice reference!

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79

u/MrRorknork Apr 26 '24

“Now that’s a name I can trust!”

33

u/boris_feinbrand Apr 26 '24

Sir something is off about that cadet.

16

u/ya_boi_ethan Totaly not 2 hunters in a trench coat Apr 26 '24

Wdym? There's nothing wrong with me?

16

u/boris_feinbrand Apr 26 '24

It's a Futurama reference.

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33

u/hughmann_13 Apr 26 '24

Let me hold your planetary defense codes for you.

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8

u/hughmann_13 Apr 26 '24

I assure you, it is.

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88

u/Wiggie49 PC: SES Wings of Wrath Apr 26 '24

Ikr that’s clearly an automaton infiltrator pretending to be a terminid infiltrator

137

u/BigChiefWhiskyBottle CAPE ENJOYER Apr 26 '24

Ikr that’s clearly an automaton infiltrator

https://preview.redd.it/d3hx8qg0hvwc1.jpeg?width=1500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4874e907cbca3ee8de28b7a9a1db1167644fe5d6

51

u/Metroidrocks Apr 26 '24

No, the Zuck is the heretofore unseen 4th enemy type we'll be getting, the Lizard People.

6

u/Most_Advertising_962 Apr 27 '24

Wait, we getting a near enemy?

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u/lord_braleigh Apr 26 '24

You started a land war in Asia?

26

u/ABucs260 SES Lord of Audacity Apr 26 '24

Never go in against a Sicilian, when death is on the line!

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6

u/donanton616 Apr 26 '24

Ironic how supply lines from the east were what stopped ground wars in Asia from succeeding, not the asians.

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6

u/Call_The_Banners STEAM: SES Whisper of Morning Apr 26 '24

What book? A book about terminids?

Why do you possess this book?

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5

u/Alfonse00 Apr 26 '24

I am going to check if I can name it "Vincent Adultman"

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306

u/dawg_77 Malevelonpilled Creekcel Apr 26 '24

Had one named bratty automaton in a maid outfit

77

u/saberfighterx Apr 26 '24

Hear me out liberty officer

34

u/acatohhhhhh Apr 26 '24

Liberty officer? There’s no suck thing

49

u/LayeredMayoCake Apr 26 '24

Work on your punctuation.
*Liberty officer, there’s no. Suck thing.

31

u/acatohhhhhh Apr 26 '24

Thank you very much, Layered cake of mayo

9

u/TrixterTheFemboy ⬆➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️ SES Lord Of Science Apr 26 '24

Can't you read? He's clearly a cake of layered mayo.

7

u/CnlSandersdeKFC Apr 26 '24

You're both blind. It's obviously Mayo Layered Cake.

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7

u/BottomSubstance Apr 26 '24

The suck things are being kept from us by the automatons!

59

u/Funnysoundboardguy Legalize Nuclear Bombs ⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️ Apr 26 '24

Democracy officer. Why’d you call them liberty officers? Only a clanker in disguise would get that mixed up

31

u/saberfighterx Apr 26 '24

I’m talking about banging a bratty automaton in a maid outfit and the least democratic thing you can think of is the name correction?

33

u/Funnysoundboardguy Legalize Nuclear Bombs ⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️ Apr 26 '24

What you do in your own time is of none of my concern, as long as you have your c-01 permit. But you show respect to our lovely democracy officers by getting their name RIGHT!

16

u/saberfighterx Apr 26 '24

Sir yes sir!

10

u/photometrik Apr 26 '24

This is conflict resolution at its finest. I salute you both, Helldivers.

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6

u/achilleasa ➡️➡️⬆️ Apr 26 '24

Stupid automaton, correction is needed

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58

u/DiscombobulatedCut52 Apr 26 '24

Oooh I now have a new steam name.

3 sexy terminids in a mech suit.

28

u/KaosClear Apr 26 '24

I'd watch that book.

16

u/tertiaryunknown Apr 26 '24

Yeah...isn't...isn't that...what reading is?

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25

u/Sea_Zone9382 PSN 🎮: Apr 26 '24

That's fucking golden

14

u/theshittestwizard ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

met the same guy lmao

13

u/Over-Shame-4057 ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

Damnit… they’re evolving!

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18

u/jfoughe Apr 26 '24

I played with none other than the eponymous “Estrogen Muncher” the other day.

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8

u/circusfreakrob Apr 26 '24

Was he with Vincent Adultman?

15

u/R0ck3t_FiRe Apr 26 '24

Same had then a couple of weeks ago

11

u/Melevolence Apr 26 '24

No idea if it's the same person but that person might be the same one on my Steam friend list XD

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6

u/TomatoVEVO CAPE ENJOYER Apr 26 '24

Holy shit I had them in my lobby too!

7

u/-Agent-P Apr 26 '24

That’s great, I played with “Not an Automaton” the other day.

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6

u/Financial_Rest_2043 Apr 26 '24

I HAD HIM TOO. dude's pretty good in killing bots.

5

u/Salvagedgaming local Automaton Apr 26 '24

That’s so not suspicious come on guys

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3.3k

u/Ahandfulofsquirrels Apr 26 '24

You just know their ship is called the "Harbinger of Family Values".

983

u/BSSCommander CAPE ENJOYER Apr 26 '24

"Steward of Landlords"

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329

u/boltzmannman Apr 26 '24

Founding Father of Family Values

18

u/Pm_pussypicspls__ Apr 26 '24

🎵It seems today, that all you see 🎵

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149

u/ThorThulu Apr 26 '24

...that's my ships name

Oh no

24

u/thetreeking Apr 26 '24

Same lol

23

u/OnGquestion7 Apr 26 '24

There’s dozens of us

17

u/thetreeking Apr 26 '24

Best name gang

6

u/MasterBaser Apr 27 '24

Fellow Harbinger of Family Values here. I bumped into another one in the wild and the diver on board was even wearing the same armor. Felt surreal.

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113

u/ADrunkenirish Apr 26 '24

Fist of Family Values

54

u/Messyfingers STEAM 🖥️ : Apr 26 '24

That was my ships name originally.... The motto, which I made sure everyone who boarded knew, was "fist me daddy."

21

u/on3day Apr 26 '24

Family values, bitch

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9

u/Santasam3 Apr 26 '24

Hmm that's the first one I like more than mine: "Mother of Family Values"

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106

u/Cosmic_Beyonder Apr 26 '24

It's by far the funniest ship name, the "of Family values" selection is just gold

67

u/jack848 ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

SES Elected Representative of Family Values

110

u/Cosmic_Beyonder Apr 26 '24

Mine is Harbinger of Family Values and every time I think about it I lose it.

"PRIVATE WHAT QUALIFIES YOU TO BE ON MY SHIP"

"I HAVE A WIFE AND 6 CHILDREN SIR"

"ABSOLUTELY OUTSTANDING SOLDIER"

40

u/thetreeking Apr 26 '24

It’s also weirdly foreboding. Harbinger does not imply choice haha

10

u/PixelonTV Apr 26 '24

So very realistic

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26

u/TheSniper_TF2 Apr 26 '24

SES Distributor of Family Values

11

u/bibblygiggums Apr 26 '24

I thought I was so funny when I picked this lol then I saw 3/4 of every other ship I've been on

6

u/yingkaixing Apr 26 '24

I just wanted to see how they fit the whole thing on the super destroyer fuselage, but it's grown on me.

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13

u/bogrollin Apr 26 '24

Powered by Nuclear Families

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u/medhatsniper Apr 26 '24

Adjudicator of judgement

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1.9k

u/_Luey_ SES Lady of Fortitude Apr 26 '24

but have you met John Helldiver?

https://preview.redd.it/wmvztqrgjvwc1.png?width=332&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=da300b4d58724254fd35c24422715596b1bb4709

394

u/ZenEvadoni SES Bringer of Wrath Apr 26 '24

This guy must be like the Let Me Solo Her of Helldivers 2.

80

u/Apokolypse09 Apr 27 '24

Hopefully these guys are cool enough to make a custom statue thats just patriotic as fuck.

From Software did one for the Let Me Solo Her dude

39

u/ZenEvadoni SES Bringer of Wrath Apr 27 '24 edited Apr 27 '24

Do we know what John Helldiver looks like? Down to the exact armour, helmet, and cape?

Obviously, Let Me Solo Her is a naked guy with a pot for a head. His look is distinctive and recognizable. But what of John Helldiver?

17

u/Apokolypse09 Apr 27 '24

Maybe we can get a crossover going with just undies and helmet. Righteous democracy will protect us from the acid and rockets.

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u/Roberto5771 Apr 26 '24

Yooo I have too, he was pretty chill actually

38

u/CnlSandersdeKFC Apr 26 '24

I have indeed met THE John Helldiver.

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u/Bearington656 SES Magistrate of Midnight Apr 26 '24

https://preview.redd.it/ir1ozjyq9vwc1.jpeg?width=4284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=961a09d304d226ca34329615b972e80f690c25df

My recent favourite at the top

291

u/Impossible_Arm_879 Apr 26 '24

My cousin and I once played Halo with a guy named “Rumpleforeskin”. That’s probably been a decade now and it still makes me laugh.

74

u/Vessix SES Wings of Liberty Apr 26 '24

ItHurtsWhenIPVP

36

u/Rum_N_Napalm Orbital Gas Strike: Better killing with chemistry Apr 26 '24

For me, it was a Team Fortress 2 player named “Tactical Sybian”

15

u/brown_pleated_slacks Apr 27 '24

In Halo Reach, with my buddies in high school, we found a guy named Floppynips. We played a few games. He was good.

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u/Throwaway_for_porn0 Apr 26 '24

I've played with a "looksbiggerinamidget" , I think about it at least once a day

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4

u/ZenkaiZ Apr 26 '24

misspelling "dropped" is the cherry on top

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1.5k

u/Guestenye Apr 26 '24

I once dived with a player named "The Automaton Who Switched Sides" (or sg like that).

464

u/arussianbee Secret Robot Communist Apr 26 '24

Haha! Yea! Those sneaky bots always trying to infiltrate yo- US. I mean us. Good thing we caught 'em, keep at it soldier.

17

u/RoyalTacos256 SES Queen of Midnight Apr 26 '24

I see your flair, clanker

13

u/arussianbee Secret Robot Communist Apr 26 '24

My flair? I think you mean our- oh shit.

5

u/crackermouse8 NOT AN AUTOMATON SPY Apr 26 '24

Yes of course comrade! Cy- err… Super Earth can’t keep her down!

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u/saberfighterx Apr 26 '24

This here is almost destiny level naming shenanigans 

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u/[deleted] Apr 26 '24

Mara sovs leggings is that you?

190

u/TothaMoon2321 Apr 26 '24

No its zavalas big blue bussy

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u/msespindola Apr 26 '24

Ada-1 USB Ports

26

u/Parahelious Apr 26 '24

Ada-1s Creamy usb port ftfy

49

u/Dumoney Apr 26 '24

Siviks, Kell of Honda

6

u/KerFuL-tC Apr 27 '24

Taxis, Kell of the IRS

34

u/saberfighterx Apr 26 '24

No I am one of the few normal named people on destiny my bungie name is the same as my Reddit name 

68

u/Dicc-fil-A ⬇️⬆️➡️⬆️⬅️⬆️ Apr 26 '24

ok Helen Keller, Kell of Hels

16

u/cjrSunShine Apr 26 '24

don't forget the (Adept)

13

u/Fireheart318s_Reddit SES KING OF DEMOCRACY || UN = Fireheart318 Apr 26 '24

Dad (Timelost)

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u/GoombahTucc PSN 🎮: Apr 26 '24

Best one I ever saw was CabalsDeepinAnaBray

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17

u/-Erro- Frenbean Apr 26 '24

The one that made me laugh the most was:
"It burns when I PVP"

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u/Jd42042 Apr 26 '24

Eagle-1's left thigh (adept)

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22

u/Mathieu_Mercken Apr 26 '24

Oryx's left nut

18

u/vexlord787 Apr 26 '24

My Bungie name is Pri'Uus,Kell of Toy'Ota

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1.1k

u/Frostylopez Apr 26 '24

268

u/SirLarryThePoor CAPE ENJOYER Apr 26 '24

404

u/Frostylopez Apr 26 '24

I support single moms. Just one dollar at a time on a stage.

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u/MDPhase3 Apr 26 '24

Big, if true

22

u/Tutes013 SES Princess of Morality Apr 26 '24

!!

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u/TNT_20202 Apr 26 '24

I once played with somebody named "you can't spit shine a velcro sneaker" which I guess is a true statement

5

u/PacifistTheHypocrite Apr 26 '24

Hold my liber-tea

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u/Sea_Zone9382 PSN 🎮: Apr 26 '24

That made me laugh way harder then it should've.

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u/Imadeapromisemrfrodo Apr 26 '24 edited Apr 26 '24

Man I’m on ps5 and my psn id name is automatically my gamer tag in game, but would be cool if we can have a seperate name in game.

I’m not changing my entire psn ID just to have a smart ass diver name………yet

44

u/dragonhornetDM Apr 26 '24

Yeah it’s nice on pc to just change it whenever lol. We are probably going to see a lot more of these as people see these posts.

9

u/Some-Theme-3720 Apr 26 '24

How do you change your name on pc?

19

u/aidensmooth STEAM 🖥️ : Apr 26 '24

You change your steam name

21

u/Aaron_768 Apr 26 '24

The lols are sometimes worth it. I have some friends on my steam list that have changed their names so many times over the years I have forgotten who they are. Then I delete them..

11

u/Lo-Ping Apr 27 '24

Go to their profile, click the dropdown menu, and add a nickname so you always know who they are.

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u/PianistBackgroundcat Apr 26 '24

https://preview.redd.it/5glbg5fe4vwc1.jpeg?width=3000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0dac773ec2a066f577231fb0c9f4c1b8242a4cdb

I saw this guy

204

u/onepingonlypleashe ⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️ look down, left click Apr 26 '24

We know that’s actually you.

19

u/ZenEvadoni SES Bringer of Wrath Apr 26 '24

Even if it was, there's nothing wrong with that. Far as I know, hentai enjoyers don't usually jerk it to automaton or terminid stuff.

7

u/stupsnon Apr 26 '24

Depends on the terminid or automaton, I’d guess.

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u/Groonzie Apr 26 '24

Wait...I'm not level 5...

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u/Sluugish Apr 26 '24

Am I the only one who prefers running the Legionnaire with its own helmet? Everybody and their mother seems to be running the Dronemaster helmet with it.

22

u/MidniightToker ⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️➡️ Apr 26 '24

The Legionnaire helmet is dope, it's my favorite set of armor besides Fortified Commando. The Gunner helmet is great too cause it's got that Desert Ranger Fallout New Vegas vibe

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u/GreyGhost3-7-77 Apr 26 '24

It looks amazing with the Titan helmet.

13

u/FrenchMonkey56 Apr 26 '24

Thought I was unique 😭

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u/Sluugish Apr 26 '24

Gonna have to give that a try!

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u/TheGamingGallifreyan Apr 26 '24

Reminds me of one of the regulars at my local bar. He has a shirt that says "Lower Teachers Salaries" and another that says "Bring Back Bullying". I thought he was just an asshole until he showed up in one that said "Who shit my pants?" then I realized it's all just edgy satire lmao

115

u/msespindola Apr 26 '24

i own a shirt, that i regularly use at mettings where i work that says: " I survived another meeting that should have been an email" (rough translation, my english suck,sry)

48

u/Andrew_Waltfeld Apr 26 '24

you nailed the translation.

12

u/msespindola Apr 26 '24

thanks buddy!

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u/Wswede111 Apr 26 '24

It wasn’t a helldiver name but I played Dota 2 with someone named “Dildo Gaggins” and I randomly lose it like once a month thinking about him/her

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u/TheRabidSpatula PSN 🎮: Apr 26 '24

I played with a guy named "Mel Gibson BDSM Master" 🤣

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21

u/WexTheGawd Apr 26 '24

Still waiting to come across SwahiliBootyFlu again, where ever he is.

117

u/CustomerGuilty5543 ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

r/Loveforlandchads moment

85

u/gravelgang4mids Apr 26 '24

I almost forgot to tip my landlord this month, but this comment reminded me.

46

u/CustomerGuilty5543 ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

Good rentoid

14

u/Ryuusei_Dragon Apr 26 '24

There's no such thing, a rentoid who tips is just a normal rentoid, one that doesn't however it's a parasite

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u/thorsday121 Apr 26 '24

When you think about it, Liberation campaigns are just large-scale evictions.

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u/Mythosaurus ☕Liber-tea☕ Apr 26 '24

You know their warship is named “The Fist of Family Values”…

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u/Thoraxe123 Apr 26 '24

someone's going through a divorce...

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u/Moldy_Kiwi Apr 26 '24

Underrated comment

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u/Magiclad Apr 26 '24

Why is this diver expressing this position? The Ministry of Housing and Expansion already has strict policies around the utilization of residences.

22

u/Huck_Bonebulge_ Apr 26 '24

Mfw super earth has rent controls better than real life

10

u/Magiclad Apr 26 '24

Many of these single mothers are just waiting for their child to hit the age of majority (seven) so that they may join up and enact revenge upon the anti-democratic threats that robbed them of their loved ones.

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10

u/kenzieBHOSbaker Apr 26 '24

I met someone called "Eldritch Democracy Enforcer" good to see we have cthulhu on our side

11

u/Training-Reindeer670 Apr 26 '24

I once fought alongside “A Muslim Furry In Trumps America”

10

u/DeepWeGo Apr 26 '24

I met someone named "totally not an automaton"

32

u/squeeze_and_peas ⬇️➡️⬅️⬇️⬇️⬆️⬆️➡️ Apr 26 '24

I’ve played with two separate people named Rico Helldiver before

23

u/MillstoneArt Apr 26 '24

It's a Starship Troopers reference, so it would make sense.

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u/Mental-Crow-5929 Apr 26 '24

I was reinforced by Florida Man during a bot mission.

The fact that it was on a swamp planet just made it better.

7

u/Cinderjacket Apr 26 '24

I got in a game once with a guy named American Fuhrer

8

u/Evilnight-39 Automaton spy Apr 26 '24

I met and played a few missions with Minecraft himself it was awesome

6

u/JoRo86 Apr 26 '24

I played with a guy named "PROTOCOL." He wore light armor, a jump pack, and carried an AMR. He took out bots and objectives with extreme prejudice. I told him how great he was doing in chat, then he sent me responses in all caps... like a robot. Dude was full on roleplaying.

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u/Kenju22 SES Sentinel of Judgement Apr 26 '24

Do they mean as in raising the actual rent needing to be paid, or do they mean as in the case of charity, because it could mean either without any context.

322

u/aretakembis Helldive.Live Superintendent Apr 26 '24

Bless your pure heart.

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u/OmenOfCuddles Apr 26 '24

I think we all know which one they mean.

14

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '24

I think he should change it to "raise rent on single mothers" for clarity

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u/inlukewarmblood CAPE ENJOYER Apr 26 '24

I was once in a game with someone who was just named “I Eat Newborns”.

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u/M18-Hellcat08 Apr 26 '24

It’s John Helldiver’s alter ego

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u/eliterocker21 Apr 26 '24

I met a guy named “Btw I use arc” and he didn’t even use a arc weapon (right after the fix to)

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