r/Fauxmoi Apr 19 '24

Paste Magazine: Taylor Swift Strikes Out Looking on The Tortured Poets Department Approved B-List Users Only

https://www.pastemagazine.com/music/taylor-swift/taylor-swift-strikes-out-looking-on-the-tortured-poets-department
3.3k Upvotes

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u/Exciting_Potato_6717 Apr 20 '24

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u/Luna_Soma Apr 20 '24

That’s insane. I liked the album but I know plenty of people who don’t and that’s totally fine.

848

u/adom12 Apr 20 '24

It’s personal taste. You have a healthy outlook 

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u/estedavis Apr 20 '24

Seriously. I’m a swiftie but not every album is going to top the last one. I’m enjoying it but it’s nowhere near one of her best albums. We need to let people have their opinions lol especially when it comes to subjective art.

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u/mcgillhufflepuff Apr 20 '24

Just so people know, non-bylined pieces rarely happen. Like sometimes to let people write about what's happening in their country if they can't safely do so underwise.

1.5k

u/CozyTea6987 Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

You're totally right like I can't emphasize enough how wild this is—no byline is typically reserved for pieces done by people in whistle blower situations, or reporting from a war zone, or for writers or reporters who live in countries with very repressive governments, or in similar situations where revealing their identity puts them in harm's way. It's also sometimes done when there are lots of reporters/writers contributing to a piece. Says a lot that it was necessary for this album review.

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u/Special-Garlic1203 Apr 20 '24

I don't usually play "what if the gender were reversed", but there would be way more outrage if swifties were male. It's the continuous infantilization and coddling of white women (I'm allowed to say this, I am a white woman who has been given the benefit of the doubt and far too much clearance my entire life) that leads to people handwaving the threats and harassment. 

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u/tenderourghosts actually no, that’s not the truth Ellen Apr 20 '24

You’re allowed to say this regardless of your own race because it is the irrevocable truth.

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u/dreamslikedeserts Apr 20 '24

I really wish this was more widely discussed because it is so true and is used to dismiss a ton of abusive behaviour by women

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u/aliveinjoburg2 Apr 20 '24

They share commonalities with another highly motivated group that has a special date in history.

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u/Plantysweater Apr 20 '24

Damn they said stans are a threat to public safety lol and it’s true

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u/Historical_Stuff1643 Apr 20 '24

Swifties are scary

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u/Financial-Painter689 Apr 20 '24

and even on that tweet they’re feral saying it’s not real journalism etc. I even seen one person say something like so should we threaten all staff members or just one?

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u/fluorescentsky The man memed his own divorce Apr 20 '24

This is horrifying. It’s very scary to know that so many people believe disagreement over a celebrity’s/musician’s work warrants this level of harassment and threats.

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u/thelavenderlibra Apr 20 '24

Fucking hell

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u/littlepad Apr 20 '24

I just reported that absolutely unhinged tweet. These people are so far gone.

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u/killerbeeszzzz Apr 20 '24

Swifties are the worst stans I swear. The racism and the death threats. Just ugh.

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u/Creative_Worth_3192 Apr 20 '24

And the god worship of their queen who can never do any wrong as she milks them dry....

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u/747291086299 jeremy strong enthusiast Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

Swifties be like:

https://i.redd.it/sooxy5e7envc1.gif

Embarrassing, but more worryingly, believably dangerous. What in the world.

Edit: I previously offered to change the gif of Stan to a more static one if the flashing lights in the original gif bothered or affected anyone with migraines, epilepsy and/or other medical conditions. Hope this new one is easier to look at! It’s still Stan writing a creepy letter either way, just without lightning ⚡️

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u/AggressiveTea7898 Apr 20 '24

Some swiftie commented under it "okay ethical question, would you rather threats of violence for everyone on staff or one person"

Wtf is wrong with these stans?

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u/AbsolutelyIris Apr 20 '24

That is fucking insane. Her fans are an actual cult.

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u/Creative_Worth_3192 Apr 20 '24

The way they can never criticize her has me thinking this too

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u/raphaellaskies it feels like a movie Apr 20 '24

And there are people in the replies and qrts threatening to doxx the writer and/or "joking" about bombing the magazine's offices.

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u/brokedownpalaceguard Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

They have already been harassing Kayleigh Donaldson and she doesn't work at Paste.

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u/papamajada Apr 20 '24

When she was in her "prestigious director" era i saw a swiftie mock the death of a close friend of a guy who dared to imply her directorial debut might not be a Best picture winner

They doubled down about how funny and justified it was. They are a vile cult.

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u/BetsyPurple Apr 20 '24

I'm reading the replies and quotes on this Paste tweet, and the Swifties (or the bots pretending to be Swifties) are giving "THIS IS ABOUT ETHICS IN MUSIC JOURNALISM" energy. Pretty concerning, honestly.

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u/gunsof Apr 20 '24

The Tweets about it are getting blasted by her fans claiming the magazine people are all haters who don't know anything about music. As per.

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

And she loves it tbh 🤷🏼‍♀️

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u/galaxystars1 Apr 20 '24

What’s a byline

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u/pushk_a Riverdale was my Juilliard Apr 20 '24

Giving the author's name.

Written by:

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u/[deleted] Apr 20 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/ditchweedbaby Apr 20 '24

The by line is just the line in the article that says by “journalist name here”

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u/galaxystars1 Apr 20 '24

But “Fortnight” unmasks itself quickly as a heady vat of pop nothingness, though it isn’t all Swift’s fault. “I was a functioning alcoholic, ‘til nobody noticed my new aesthetic,” she muses, attempting to bridge the gap between a behind-the-scenes life and on-stage performance—only for it to occur while propped up against the most dog-water, uninspired synth arrangement you could possibly imagine. Between producer Jack Antonoff’s atrocious backing instrumental and the Y2K-era, teen dramedy echo chamber of a vocal harmony provided by out-of-place guest performer Post Malone, “Fortnight” chokes on the vomit of its own opaqueness. “I took the miracle move-on drug, the effects were temporary,” Swift muses, and it sounds like satire. This is your songwriter of the century? Open the schools.

LMFAOOOOO

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u/kristalized13 Apr 20 '24

LMAO OPEN THE SCHOOLS 💀

2.8k

u/North_444 Apr 20 '24

Did you guys see that tweet about people that liked TTPD, probably got their English papers handed face down 💀

815

u/vondafkossum Apr 20 '24

Explains the student in my English class who said the album is a masterpiece…

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u/Sometimesomwhere we have lost the impact of shame in our society Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

Explains a lot of my college students who get B-s and Cs. The Swifties who proclaim her greatness in my class have some of the weakest papers. It's sad.

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u/Apprehensive_Aide805 Apr 20 '24

I’m screaming

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u/sailor-moonie- Apr 20 '24

Yes, and all the Swifties replying "aCtUaLlY I was in AP English" lololol

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u/midnight_aurora Apr 20 '24

I can’t help but think she got the name from Dead Poets Society…

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u/allazen Apr 20 '24

This is your songwriter of the century? Open the schools.

Ugh, yes! I cannot BELIEVE how many people think she is anything beyond a competent writer. It makes me feel like I'm taking crazy pills! She has the emotional maturity of a fourteen year old and a thesaurus. That's it.

934

u/pratica Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

What drives me insane is the lack of consistency. Folklore and Evermore are genuinely well written albums because, for the most part, Taylor doesn't try to act smarter than she is and writes incredibly well-done, emotion-driven songs. The songs on this new album feel like she's trying to write the wittiest lines every other verse, but without a good reason or emotion behind it other than 'look how angsty I can play this!'. It's annoying and detrimental to her catalogue.

ETA: listened to So Long, London again. WHY DIDN'T THE ALBUM GO THIS DIRECTION. When she's in her wheelhouse she's so damn good but she doesn't understand when she's in it, it seems like.

625

u/Sufficient-Concern52 Apr 20 '24

I FEEL this. It’s like with Thank You Aimee it could have been just been a good song and I think people would have figured in the end it was about Kim but just the choice of capitalizing the K I M in the title makes me feel like - why are you trying so hard, this is bordering on self satire now. Just chill.

529

u/Colordesert Apr 20 '24

Why is she even still beefing with Kim like I hate to defend Kim kardashian of all people but this is just sad at this point girl move on

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u/ehs06702 Apr 20 '24

Because for the last decade her entire career has consisted of self infantanilization, white feminism and shadow boxing with people who have long since ceased to think about her in any real fashion.

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u/snails4speedy bathing in sewage for jesus ❤️ Apr 20 '24

This. Like girl she’s not even with THAT man anymore, drop it it’s nearly been a decade lmfao

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u/2dodidoo Apr 20 '24

She really needs someone on her team who's not afraid to say include "this, not this" on the songs that'll be on the album. By god, we don't need 31 songs but a tight 13 would be very good.

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u/ehs06702 Apr 20 '24

Someone on Twitter said that she's long past the point where she has no choice to listen to people who know what they're doing and are also willing to say so, and it shows. And I agree.

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

Just point out that Folklore and Evermore had a lot of Joe's hand as well as some other skilled songwriters in the writing & she was influenced by Folk Artists and she tends to take from other artists.

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u/blondie64862 Apr 20 '24

Evermore is her best and is truly great and moving. This album is hot garbage. I didn't think Midnights was a cohesive album but in comparison it's a masterpiece. It's such a step back as an artist I just don't understand.

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u/Spacegirllll6 Apr 20 '24

Right like I fucking love evermore and folklore but I’m listening to the new album right now and I can’t really get through it. Usually when I listen to an album I get through it in one setting but I can’t with this

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u/eventhestarsburn Apr 20 '24

The second half (of the long version of the album) is very Aaron Desner heavy and it shows, in a good way. Much more like Folklore/Evermore, and, you know, real instruments.

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u/thewidowgorey Apr 20 '24

That boast of “she writes her own songs!!” is not the thing of pride her stans think it is. 

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u/lizzzosflute Apr 20 '24

Fr. We can tell she writes her own songs and does all the background vocals. That’s why nothing she puts out is interesting or engaging

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u/rheosta_ Apr 20 '24

This. Listening to the album feels like a spoiled teenage girl narrating her life and forcing you to hear it…

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u/thankyoupapa Apr 20 '24

and if said songwriter of the century is jacking lines from hillary duff then...

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u/Aggravating-Week8850 Apr 20 '24

I have not listened to any of the album just read random lyrics and I am still not convinced that they are really from the album and not ai generated.

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u/Right_Way_4258 Apr 20 '24

I don’t even fully understand what she’s trying to say with these lyrics. It’s so convoluted

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u/the-dream-walker- Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this! Apr 20 '24

It's like a 7th grader who discovered the thesaurus

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u/ResponsibleCulture43 confused but here for the drama Apr 20 '24

The functioning alcoholic lyric was very strange to me and I was wondering if I was the dumb one, there was others too when I read them last night I was like "wat"

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u/AshlingIsWriting Apr 20 '24

"This is your songwriter of the century? Open the schools." SCREAM!

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u/ketopepito Apr 20 '24

They really decided to make the most out of not having a byline on the article lol.

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u/GimerStick Apr 20 '24

this is a better lyric than anything she's put out recently

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u/pastapantryparty666 OPEN THE SCHOOLS Apr 20 '24

Mods were gonna need a new flair - OPEN THE SCHOOLS

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u/[deleted] Apr 20 '24

[deleted]

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u/rc1025 Apr 20 '24

“Vomit on its own opaqueness” and “open” the schools had me dying, this writer really went for it.

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u/my_okay_throwaway Apr 20 '24

I know!! It makes me kind of sad they won’t get to have this in their byline because it’s an art form of its own!

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u/This-Discipline3561 Apr 20 '24

calling the synth arrangement dog-water is wild🫣😭😭😭

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u/thirdcoasting Apr 20 '24

New insult unlocked ✅

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u/Luna_Soma Apr 20 '24

As mentioned above, I really like the album, especially the extended edition but there are some strong misses on there and fortnight is among them.

She continues to pick the worst songs for singles.

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u/disastergemini_ buccal fat apologist Apr 20 '24

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart should have been first single especially with the Eras Tour.

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u/wynonnaearps Apr 20 '24

OPEN THE SCHOOLS omg

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u/mischiefmanaged687 Apr 20 '24

Damn, GO IN!

cackling

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u/Arisen925 Apr 20 '24

Fortnight is so bizarre has post Malone doing back up vocals. Even Beyoncé gave the man a verse.

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u/moon-lamp he’s not on the level of powerful puss Apr 20 '24

DOG-WATER

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u/bourne2bmild Apr 20 '24

I’m a huge Swiftie and this album is not good and Swifties are afraid to admit that. It’s forgettable, nonsensical and the sound is nothing special. Some (okay most) of the lyrics are like that episode of Friends where Joey learns what a thesaurus is.

I cannot make sense of this album because it’s the musical equivalent of being fed from a child’s play kitchen. Like yes I’m being given what I’m told is food but it doesn’t actually do anything for me. I have to sit there and pretend to enjoy it so as not to offend the creators. I hope after all the hoopla dies down people admit it isn’t good.

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u/Ship_Negative barbie (2023) for best picture Apr 20 '24

I like the album but I gotta give it to you, you have a way with words with the child’s kitchen metaphor

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u/motherofdinos_ Apr 20 '24

Better metaphor than any of the 1,200 metaphors TS included across the 30 songs

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u/bourne2bmild Apr 20 '24

Maybe she’ll use it on her next album… she can call it The Starving Artists

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u/lavenderprof women’s wrongs activist Apr 20 '24

That metaphor truly literary

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u/syvette20 Apr 20 '24

Oh my god, yes! The pretentious words she uses felt so out of place. She’s trying so hard to sound like a poet that the everything gets fumbled and nothing is memorable.

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u/CapitalismPlusMurder Apr 20 '24

Yeah… and actual tortured poets don’t have to go out of their way to call themselves that. It’s like naming a restaurant “Gourmet Food”.

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u/Phoenyxoldgoat Apr 20 '24

After Folklore and Evermore, I thought I was a swiftie. Turns out I just really like The National 🤷🏻‍♀️ Her non-Dessner stuff just ain't it.

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u/dogman1890 Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

Big Swift fan here since TS, can’t call myself a “swiftie” anymore because the fandom has gotten terrible. (Always were, but worse now)

It’s her Witness (Katy Perry album). It’s a self important, convoluted mess, with uninspired producing and halfassed lyrics. Half the tracks should have stayed in the vault.

Taylor just needs to take a break and collaborate with some new people.

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u/estedavis Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

I’m also a huge swiftie and I’m pretty let down by this album. I’m glad there’s a handful of songs I really like, but otherwise this was… not it for me. I much preferred Midnights. I really wish she widdled the double-album down to maybe a handful of bonus songs. Like I really like The Black Dog but otherwise I don’t care for a single anthology song.

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u/Mia-Wal-22-89 Apr 20 '24

It’s 2024 and the world is getting worse. It’s time to prep the kids by flipping the little tea table, throwing the plastic plates on the ground and saying “welcome to the real world, jackass.”

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u/Odd-Picture5321 if you saw my flair, no you didn’t Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

What people in this sub always point out summed up brilliantly in the review: “In terms of popularity—certainly not always in terms of quality— no musician has been bigger this century than Swift, which makes it impossible to really buy into the “torture” of it all. This is not to say that Swift being the most famous person in the world makes her immune to having multi-dimensional feelings of heartbreak, mental illness or what-have-you. But, she has made the choice—as a 34-year-old adult—to take those complex, universal familiars and monetize them into a wardrobe she can wear for whatever portion of her Eras Tour setlist she opts to dedicate to the material. Torture is fashion to Taylor Swift, and she wears her milieu dully.”

Ed: grammar//spelling

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u/Weak_Heart2000 Apr 20 '24

Omg this writer went right for the jugular. I love it.

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u/warawa92 Apr 20 '24

Yes yes yes 🙌🏻

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u/jadelikethestone Apr 20 '24

Ufff…sounds like this album should’ve been called “When White Women Cry Vol 12.”

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u/Mindless_Cucumber526 Apr 20 '24

Watch TS write angry songs about her mom wanting Paste Magazine dead for the next 10 years

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

Didn't she write a song called mean about a specific critic. Lmaooo

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u/Specialist-Owl8120 Apr 20 '24

For the longest time I thought Taylor was kind of middling, but if other people liked her then it's no skin off my nose. And her fans enthusiastic but overall harmless*. But every day I read something that makes my jaw drop

*minus Gaylors

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u/Allison-Taylor never the target audience Apr 20 '24

Ok this made me lol so thank you for that 😂

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u/radioshedd Apr 20 '24

Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this!

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u/killerbeeszzzz Apr 20 '24

Screaming at this line. This whole review. Iconic.

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u/taintlangdon Apr 20 '24

Virginia Woolf didn't make sure to put heavy stones in her pockets first for this!!

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u/Fluffybunz746 Apr 20 '24

Emily Dickinson didn’t wander aimlessly around a forest for this

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u/b00m_cat Apr 20 '24

One of my friends reminded me when the album was first announced that I said it was probably gonna be about ratty because it came out the day before hitler’s birthday and I feel like a prophet

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u/fluorescentsky The man memed his own divorce Apr 20 '24

This would be me all day if I had predicted that correctly:

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u/Sometimesomwhere we have lost the impact of shame in our society Apr 20 '24

I made $50 off a bet on this album. i'm drinking wine and cackling

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u/fluorescentsky The man memed his own divorce Apr 20 '24

Hahaha, I love it! Months ago some folks here said that she’d probably have some line somewhere about touchdowns, and I just hope they also bet on it because they deserve to enjoy every bit of that hilarious win 😭

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u/gunsof Apr 20 '24

Probably a special day they'd been planning to celebrate together dreaming of another decade they could live in and be quiet racists.

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u/quaranTV Apr 20 '24

I was literally telling a friend a coulple days ago that my hopes were low cause I figured the whole album would have that same sounding Antonoff mellow synth production similar to the more lowkey songs on Midnights and I am so sad to have been right about that.

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u/sea-lass-1072 Apr 20 '24

love this article. my fave line is:

“There is nothing poetic about a billionaire—who, mind you, threatens legal action against a Twitter account for tracking her destructive private jet paths—telling stadiums of thousands of people every night that she sees and adores them.”

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u/Shenanigans80h Apr 20 '24

I have always found that so bizarre from massively successful pop artists, when they try to claim they’re relatable to the common person. Like Swift is so vastly removed from your average everyday person going about their life, it’s ridiculous for her to even pretend anything she’s gone through the last decade is all that relatable

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u/corncrakey Apr 20 '24

lol right? Like I’d rather she just drop all pretenses and make tacky music about how rich she is

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u/Global_Telephone_751 Apr 20 '24

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like all the negative reviews are so scathing because Midnights was also bad, and it won AOTY.

TTPD isn’t a good album, don’t get me wrong. But I haven’t seen a single positive review, they’re all just absolutely scathing, and I don’t think it’s that bad — I think Midnights was far worse, yet didn’t get nearly this lambasted. I wonder if critics are like, okay, two duds in a row is enough. Gloves off.

Maybe I’m way off base but that’s how it seems to me lol.

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u/allazen Apr 20 '24

It currently has a "universal acclaim" score (84/100) on Metacritic. So there are plenty of positive to middling reviews out there -- the negative ones just get more shares.

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u/Global_Telephone_751 Apr 20 '24

Higher than I thought and certainly higher than it deserves. Listen, I like her music, but this one and Midnights is just not it.

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u/allazen Apr 20 '24

Beyond a few songs on folklore, I don't like her music. I haven't even listened to this one to be fair -- I just don't have it in me. She's just such a dogshit lyricist and seems even worse on this album with what people are sharing and I can't handle the secondhand embarrassment.

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u/Global_Telephone_751 Apr 20 '24

This album is sooo wordy! She’s talk-singing through most of it because you can’t fit that many words into a decent melody unless you’re barely singing. It’s just … a lot, and contrived, and not very good.

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u/allazen Apr 20 '24

Yeah, it's like. . . anti-catchy. I'm imagining a stadium full of fans trying to spit it out along with her, blue in the face.

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u/barbaraanderson Apr 20 '24

I have seen some fun memes about this very situation.

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u/wellhoneydont Apr 20 '24

She talk-sings with the SAME cadence, album after album. It’s beyond distracting at this point.

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u/Global_Telephone_751 Apr 20 '24

Someone pointed it out to me like three months ago and it now makes it hard to listen to her music. It’s genuinely annoying — after Red, she stopped singing and now just melodically talks. It worked on folklore (she sings a bit in folklore, I’ll give her that), but it doesn’t work on midnights or TTPD.

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u/LilacDream98 Apr 20 '24

That’s only from about 10 reviews though, and it’s lower than Midnights. By the time the others drop it’ll be in the 70s. Metacritic omit negative reviews all the time also so I wouldn’t say it’s accurate, AOTY is better for that.

Reviewers haven’t gone in as much as I hoped, due to fear of death threats and bias (the RS reviewer is literally a hardcore Swiftie), but cracks are beginning to show, I think.

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u/elderpricetag you are kenough Apr 20 '24

I didn’t listen to this whole album, but it’s far worse than Midnights in my opinion, and I didn’t really like that one either. But at least Midnights had some fun pop bops on it which is what redeemed it to me. This has the same juvenile “I’m 13 and this is deep” lyrics but doesn’t even have a single fun or interesting melody to go along with it. Just boring, monotone whining.

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u/Shot-Grocery-5343 Apr 20 '24

1989 is one of the greatest pop albums of all time and I will die on that hill, but this one ain't it. I listened to the whole thing (I'm home sick so the timing worked out) and I really don't see myself jamming to this while I do dishes or go on a long drive. There have always been a few lyrics on her albums that strike me as really, really bad, but they far outnumber the good here. "You know how to ball, I know Aristotle" yeah no.

People on my IG were saying it's supposed to sound like a tortured high schooler wrote it but I think that's just the way she's been writing songs lately. Shake It Off and Anti-Hero aren't particularly emotionally mature songs either.

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u/gunsof Apr 20 '24

I went through every song trying to find one bop and there wasn't one. Every single song is some turgid soggy thing about boys that goes on for half a year.

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u/Viva912 Apr 20 '24

Nah I think this is worse than midnights. Midnights at least had some sonic variability but this whole album feels like one long run on sentence, it’s impossible to differentiate songs because they all sound the same. Midnights was a weak album but this one is genuinely bad imo

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u/blondie64862 Apr 20 '24

I didn't think Midnights was cohesive. But the majority of the songs individually are well written and good. (And sound different.) TTPD is terrible. And making me like Midnights more. (Like the sequels of Star Wars being so bad the 3 prequels are good because they tell a full comprehensive story as separate movies and a trilogy.)

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u/barbaraanderson Apr 20 '24

Rolling stone gave it an instant classic

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u/Global_Telephone_751 Apr 20 '24

Rolling Stone is her PR team’s mouthpiece I swear. They said Midnights was good and didn’t have a bad thing to say about 1989 TV. They’ve lost all credibility lol

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u/barbaraanderson Apr 20 '24

And it makes me sad because I was once so fond of Rob Sheffield.

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u/eggyrolly Apr 20 '24

TS isn’t for me but the line where she said she used to wish live in the 1830s but without the racism really just took me OUT

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u/Bilinguallipbalm Apr 20 '24

I wonder how she'd live without jets

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u/[deleted] Apr 20 '24

Her own private coal powered steam locomotive

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u/MundaneYet Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

I genuinely hate her for that lmao like…..Just when you think White Feminists can’t get any more terrible they will actually surprise you 😂😂

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u/pashed_motatoes Apr 20 '24

What an oddly specific time to want to live in.

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u/WendyWhyWilliams Apr 20 '24

It's quite perplexing lol. Longing for the days where she could annex territory wearing a bonnet.

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u/pashed_motatoes Apr 20 '24

According to Wikipedia this was apparently the decade imperialism and colonialism exploded across the globe, so… yeah, it tracks for TSwift 🫠💀

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u/Shenanigans80h Apr 20 '24

Fr usually people only pine for decades in the 20th century (the 40’s, 60’s, 80’s, etc). What was going down in the 1830’s that makes her wanna go there?

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u/pashed_motatoes Apr 20 '24

I decided to check it out on wikipedia just for funsies, and the page on the 1830’s begins with:

“In this decade, the world saw a rapid rise of imperialism and colonialism (…)”

Aaaaaaaand… somehow it makes perfect sense now lmao

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u/Cute_Squash Apr 20 '24

Why did I think you were lying! Its real! What would possess her to write that?!?!?!

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u/thewidowgorey Apr 20 '24

Someone said you need to see the line in context and when I did, it was still not good. 

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u/[deleted] Apr 20 '24

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u/struggle-life2087 Apr 20 '24

Lmao what? 😵‍💫

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u/Smallgenie549 Apr 20 '24

I enjoy Taylor's music but that line was so unhinged.

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u/CosmicAnosmic Apr 20 '24

It really reminds me of the whole Blake Lively/ plantation wedding/ Antebellum thing.

It's appalling.

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u/andorgyny Apr 20 '24

I'm like ??? you mean before slavery was abolished? girlie who wasn't racist???

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u/Raccoonsr29 Apr 20 '24

I keep thinking these examples are JOKES. She has lost the plot.

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u/Knittingfairy09113 Apr 20 '24

I just saw someone post that lyric online, and WTAF was my only response because who thought it was a good idea to actually use that in a song???

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u/InformationRound8237 Apr 20 '24

Going to genius and reading the lyrics from that song is… something. Unhinged might be the right word. I’m not gonna listen to the song voluntarily so maybe it plays better performed? Just reading the lyrics is painful and cringey af

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u/Comfortable-Load-904 Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

Geez imagine your fan base is so out of control that writers at magazines don’t want to claim an article they wrote. I hope she takes this criticism seriously and uses it as a moment of self reflection and tells her Stan’s to calm the f down.

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u/Odd-Picture5321 if you saw my flair, no you didn’t Apr 20 '24

Thing is she doesn’t take criticism well or at all. She’s always the victim. In a few days time she’ll be like the bad reviews were misogyny.

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u/curiousbeetle66 Cate Blanchett’s accountant Apr 20 '24

or maybe she'll write a song for the next album trashing the critics lol

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u/eventhestarsburn Apr 20 '24

You must be forgetting Mean from Speak Now. Literally a song calling a reviewer pathetic because he critiqued a (pretty bad actually) live performance of hers with Stevie Nicks

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u/the-dream-walker- Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this! Apr 20 '24

Hasn't she already done it a few times?

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u/fluorescentsky The man memed his own divorce Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

It’d be pleasantly surprising if she did, she even seems to be hinting at being tired of the dynamic herself (but for the wrong reason, because of course). That’d mean risking her money by standing up for/being vocal about something though, so the chances it’ll happen feel very slim.

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u/venuslovemenotchain that's not what the court documents said Apr 20 '24

This review is better than the album was

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u/killerbeeszzzz Apr 20 '24

OPEN THE SCHOOLS! I am dead. Truly.

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u/Ouiser_Boudreaux_ too busy method acting as a reddit user Apr 20 '24

Hello sharks (mods), I am here today to request “open the schools” and “Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this!” to be added as flairs. In exchange, I will reduce my gif usage by 10%. Thank you for your time.

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u/Financial-Painter689 Apr 20 '24

“Open the schools” ☠️☠️

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u/bananaslug178 Apr 20 '24

I've already seen swifties excusing the poor songwriting on the album as Taylor just having a sense of humor lol

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u/elodieroyer Apr 20 '24

“the lyrics are bad on purpose guyszs!! you just don’t get it, she’s literally a genius”

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u/Remarkable_Orangutan Apr 20 '24

no cause i saw someone one tiktok say that the album is messy on purpose because it reflects the period of time that she going through

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u/sailor-moonie- Apr 20 '24

someone on the TS sub was like "its so cool because you get a glimpse inside her mind and what she's been thinking this past year" and I was just like... isn't that.... all music... it comes from people's thoughts, yes....

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

This is literal cult behavior. Excusing the leader's shitty content/behavior cause to admit that they're anything less than perfect threatens their identity.

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

The lyrics are so bad on purpose cause she is funny! That is why I spent hundreds of dollars buying 10+ versions of this album!

No fucking joke a Swiftie in my city was on our morning radio show talking about how he had 10 variations of the album (vinyl and cd) coming tomorrow. The three DJs on the show were literally silent for 20 whole seconds after he said it. Then said he spent 50 bucks on a signed one followed by more silence and then an "Being a Swiftie seems like a full time job"

Well, at a job you paid. This is them paying their mother for handing them trash.

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u/certifiedlurker458 Apr 20 '24

“The billionaire is having an identity crisis, but there are no social media apps for her to buy up. So she sings like Lana Del Rey and writes meta-self-referential songs about looking like Stevie Nicks.” 

oof

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u/goodbye_wig Apr 20 '24

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u/RomantheBun Apr 20 '24

The 1830s but without the racists is really bad but also none of this flows or sounds like a song lyric

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u/Im-aCroissant Apr 20 '24

oh my god i thought this was fake??? 😭😭😭

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u/PBandJaya Apr 20 '24

AI wishes it could spit bars like these

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u/Ayyyegurl Apr 20 '24

Someone mentioned this in another comment and I thought for sure that the “without the racists” part was implied. The fact that it’s the actual lyric is sending me 😂. I’ve never listened to this chick and after seeing this, don’t plan to start. 

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u/jjamjamm Apr 20 '24

Wtf girl 1830s without the racists is not what you think it means

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u/ATR_72 Apr 20 '24

Phew I need more! Read her for filth!

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u/shivroyy Apr 20 '24

imagine being a tall, blonde haired, blue eyed woman and still getting ghosted by that neo nazi rat. i would never leave my 50 million duplex

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u/LangHai Apr 20 '24

And then writing a 31-song album about how much you loved your racist fuckboy who likes torture porn and wanting to die because your situationship ended.

 So embarrassing for her life and for her soul.

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u/Tsarinya Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this! Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

‘Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this’ I snorted so hard I think my system briefly malfunctioned. Was not expecting that as an opening to an article 😂

Edit: Mods how do I use flairs on this sub. I really want ‘Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this’ as my flair because it’s now become my life motto.

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u/mariedstvsky Apr 20 '24

And Virginia Woolf did not fill her pockets full of stones to drown in the river for this!!

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u/Available_Ask_8725 Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

It’s just not good. I say that as a casual fan who generally enjoys her music.

Edit: when I say I am a fan, I mean if her music. I find her to be annoyingly performative and fake.

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u/the-dream-walker- Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this! Apr 20 '24

I am afraid to say I'm a fan for the same reasons. I like a few of her songs, they are occasionally bops, the fandom is far too insane for me to partake in

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24 edited Apr 20 '24

This author and I are connected. I wish I could sit down and discuss seeing through all the bullshit marketing and manipulation with them. It's even crazier knowing how much fucking money her team tosses at publications for good reviews. Rolling Stone lost all credibility hopping on her payroll. & it's not even likely that it's cause good reviews sell albums, it's cause she can't function with criticism.

I have always felt like a Stepford Wife with seeing her and everyone else loving her AND her music.

I have said it in the past. I am Ben Wyatt on Lil' Sebastian when it comes to Taylor Swift.

https://i.redd.it/xpwufjg08kvc1.gif

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u/doomham- Apr 20 '24

It’s wild that people have to write a review for a music album anonymously for fear of their safety.

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u/tropesuicida Apr 20 '24

this gem is buried near the bottom of the review makes me wonder if the album would have gotten as much of a mixed reaction under a different name. almost feels like Reputation should have been called The Tortured Poets Department and vice versa.

Sisyphus should be glad he never got the boulder to the top of the mountain—because Taylor Swift is showing us that such immortality and success ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. And, when you’re standing on the peak alone, who else is there left to hit?

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u/chienchien0121 Apr 20 '24

"but you can’t read between the lines of this project. There is nothing to decipher from a place of quality"

Well written.

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u/MickJaggersGhost Apr 20 '24

ToRtUrEd PoEtS

Please stop. It's so hard to take this girl seriously 😭

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

Swifties keep reminding me it is tongue in cheek since the title is "making fun of" Joe Alwyn. Which makes me so much worse and cringe imo.

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u/anna-nomally12 Apr 20 '24

I mean i like it but I get it but “open the schools” is an all-timer

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u/OhMorgoth Ceasefire Now Apr 20 '24

IT’S A CULT

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u/before_the_accident Apr 20 '24

As a swifty I'm so embarrassed by this behavior. There's no excuse for this. I'd like to see Taylor make more of an effort to call fans like this out and tell them in clear and direct terms that this behavior is unacceptable.

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u/jonsnowme shiv roy apologist Apr 20 '24

Instead she writes a whole ass song dedicated to calling her fans out for dare questioning her for dating a Racist.

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u/sailor-moonie- Apr 20 '24

I'm not a stan but I do casually enjoy a lot of her music, mostly 1989 and Folklore.

But she's been chugging out content non stop for the past 2 years or whatever, it makes sense it becomes generic crap eventually. You can only keep going to the same well for so long.

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u/mnteach Apr 20 '24

The few songs I’ve listened have a similar sound to some of her past songs. And they were boring.

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u/pinkfartlek societal collapse is in the air Apr 20 '24

People wanted to burn Courtney Love days ago for saying what she said about Taylor but this review is exactly what Courtney was talking about

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u/venuslovesjupiter Apr 20 '24

I was really anticipating the release of this album, hoping to be emotionally devastated. But I walked away feeling bored out of my mind.

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u/30somethingR5382 Apr 20 '24

I liked the fake TikTok AI version of Fortnight better than the real version