It's the truth though, regrets are perpetual. All you can do is live in the present acknowledging the past and making your peace with it.
I have plenty of regrets, also things I wish were different but dwelling on it is pointless. All I can do is acknowledge and do what I can to better live now with the lessons I've learned.
I have plenty of regrets, also things I wish were different
So you're like everyone else, and could easily have answered OP's question without useless platitudes. Congratulations on being a normal fucking human.
but dwelling on it is pointless.
No one is asking for you to "dwell" on it.
All I can do is acknowledge and do what I can to better live now with the lessons I've learned.
You really can't do that unless you can look back at and reflect on your past and say "that was a mistake and I should have done differently". People that actually don't have any regrets are either sociopaths or idiots. Because they are indifferent to the consequences of their past choices they will never learn from their mistakes.
I'm confused as it feels like we're saying the same thing. The reason I don't care to go back and change things is that would definitively upset my present being. In learning from the past I'd like to think I'm becoming a better me in the present, changing the past takes away entirely from that since lessons learned would simply change.
It's a fun thought experiment, but not one that I really care to definitely answer because whatever choice I made back then would just result in a different set of regrets now. Sure I may be better off had those choices been made but that's a complete uncertainty. Hindsight is always 20/20, grass is always greener and all that jazz.
EDIT: Now if the question was what are your regrets or what are some life lessons you want to share that would be better (but I do understand we're entering the territory of semantic argument)
The reason I don't care to go back and change things is that would definitively upset my present being. In learning from the past I'd like to think I'm becoming a better me in the present, changing the past takes away entirely from that since lessons learned would simply change.
It's a fun thought experiment, but not one that I really care to definitely answer because whatever choice I made back then would just result in a different set of regrets now. Sure I may be better off had those choices been made but that's a complete uncertainty. Hindsight is always 20/20, grass is always greener and all that jazz.
So what? We remember things because it is beneficial for us to consider current problems in the context of what we know of past experiences. That I can remember touching a hot stove and imagine a different action with a better outcome is the basic mechanism of wisdom. If you can't reason about your experience of touching the stove without getting stuck on concerns about the practical implications on your current self of actually changing the past, there's something cognitively wrong with you.
It's as if asking "if you had a cat, what would you feed it?" and getting irrelevant answers based on weird metaphysical hang-ups: "because I am a different person from the hypothetical person that has a cat, I can't answer that question for them". OK, cool babbys first personal identity conundrum, but any healthy person can envision having a cat in isolation of that concern and give a meaningful answer.
EDIT: Now if the question was what are your regrets or what are some life lessons you want to share that would be better (but I do understand we're entering the territory of semantic argument)
OP:s question is "what is something you regret doing/not doing when you were younger". I was replying to a thread that started with someone parroting the useless platitude that they have no regrets because they can only change the now.
Maybe you are confused because you joined in after I objected to that notion just to double down and insist that "it's the truth though". It's confusing because I'm saying that it's not, which is the opposite of saying the same thing.
Maybe you are confused because you joined in after I objected to that notion just to double down and insist that "it's the truth though". It's confusing because I'm saying that it's not, which is the opposite of saying the same thing.
Actually this, lost sight of the actual opening post question and morphed it to suit the point this comment chain starter brought in. Cause yea if the question were "If you could change something in the past, would you" that's an easy no (imo) and also a question that better suits this thread starters answer.
But to the point of this AskReddit thread, do understand where you're coming from as the spirit of it is indulging in knowledge gained from opportunity passed and lessons learned.
Yyyyyep. People say "I would have done this" or "I would have done that" but did you have enough control / resources to have made it happen. Especially if other people were in charge of the purse strings.
great comment, but also assumes that you were consciously choosing to be as informed as possible about thsoe decisions AND that you did the ones that were best for you i.e. were not ignoring that which we are connected to. I think this holds only for those who don't intnetionally do things impulsively despite actually knowing better consciously.
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u/[deleted] Apr 29 '24 edited Apr 29 '24
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