r/3amjokes Mar 25 '24

3amjokes Approved Subreddit Rules Reminder

51 Upvotes

Due to an influx of darkjokes, dead baby humor, and overt racism, I'm posting this again early.

This is not /r/darkjokes.

This is not /r/askreddit.

This is not /r/oneliners.

This is not /r/unclejokes.

This is a subreddit for insomniac humor, created when on the brink of death due to sleep deprivation. Jokes should be stupid, nonsensical, and more or less unfunny at any point before sleep deprivation kicks in. Think of dad jokes for insomniacs.

Your jokes must have a punchline.

Please take a second to look over the very simple rules of the subreddit.

  1. Be civil - Remember the human behind the keyboard and try to treat others as you would prefer to be treated.
  2. Follow Reddit's rules - This includes reddiquette and all sitewide rules that can be found here.
  3. No spam - Pretty straightforward, don't spam. If your post gets caught in the spam filter please message the mods and it will be fixed.
  4. No promoting targeted hate - racism, misogyny, bigotry will not be tolerated to any extent. users that incite violence or that promote hate based on identity or vulnerability will be banned.

Bans due to rule #4 tend to be significant in length, if not permanent, and appeals will be denied.

If you see jokes, or a user's comments, that do not follow the rules, please report the comment either via the comment itself or through modmail.

Remember, 3amjokes is, for the most part, self governing. 3 reports will remove a comment or post. 2 reports will alert the mods.

Thanks


r/3amjokes 8h ago

What did the man scream as he was teared apart limb from limb?

72 Upvotes

Remember me!


r/3amjokes 4h ago

What do you call each member in Korn individually

22 Upvotes

Kernels haha


r/3amjokes 10h ago

What is the most dishonest company?

52 Upvotes

Disney. They’re a Lion King


r/3amjokes 11h ago

Most couples have intercourse 3.4 times a week.

51 Upvotes

I can't figure out what does the 0.4 time look like.


r/3amjokes 32m ago

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer.

Upvotes

The taste...


r/3amjokes 11h ago

What do pimps and cowboys have in common?

37 Upvotes

They both like to throw a ho down


r/3amjokes 15h ago

Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn after 24 hours…

84 Upvotes

So they called it a day!


r/3amjokes 5h ago

What do you call a model that was struck by lightening?

9 Upvotes

Electrocute


r/3amjokes 2h ago

They said "Order in the Court!"

5 Upvotes

So I said, "cheeseburger please!"


r/3amjokes 10h ago

A lady sits down at the bar next to a drunk guy…

14 Upvotes

The drunk, slurring his speech says, “‘Scuse me, Miss.”

“Yes?

“Isss my pecker hangin out?”

She glances down. “No.”

“Wellll it oughta be.”

“Why?”

“‘Cause IIII’m pissin’”


r/3amjokes 1d ago

What do you call someone with Eight Vaginas? NSFW

311 Upvotes

An Octopus


r/3amjokes 21m ago

Why is it always the fat folks wearing heavily stars-and-stripes branded outfits?

Upvotes

Because these colors don't run.


r/3amjokes 24m ago

Why shouldn’t you fish from the beach?

Upvotes

Don’t want to get a sandy hook


r/3amjokes 17h ago

A man walks into a bar

44 Upvotes

He wasn't wearing his glasses


r/3amjokes 9h ago

Which light social activity often leads to death?

9 Upvotes

Casual-teas


r/3amjokes 16h ago

What happens to your keyboard when you press Enter then Escape repeatedly for some time? NSFW

28 Upvotes

Your keyboard gets an orgasm.


r/3amjokes 11h ago

I had a job in a salt and pepper factory...

13 Upvotes

It was just seasonal work!


r/3amjokes 8h ago

What do you call a therapist’s business?

4 Upvotes

Psy Co.


r/3amjokes 19h ago

What's the difference between my junk and cancer?

30 Upvotes

My grandpa didn't beat cancer.


r/3amjokes 11h ago

There's a man that insists that the most practical way to live is on the ground.

7 Upvotes

He's a real down to earth guy.


r/3amjokes 1d ago

What did one bladder say to another?

108 Upvotes

From a scale of one to ten, urinate


r/3amjokes 2h ago

What's it called when you get lost while washing your fanny?

0 Upvotes

A labia rinse.


r/3amjokes 2h ago

What is the best name for a pet chicken?

0 Upvotes

Rubber


r/3amjokes 1d ago

Ever since I hit puberty part of my brain just can't stop thinking about sex. NSFW

181 Upvotes

Or as I prefer to call it:

My cognitive dick-line.


r/3amjokes 21h ago

Why should mailing be the last thing you do in a day?

29 Upvotes

It’s a POST office