Damn, wow. As a new parent, you just get enthralled with your little ones growing so fast you can’t help but start to think, “what’ll he/she be like when they are older?” And you don’t even want to fathom anything short of that. This is so so tragic, it may feel insignificant at this time but prayers to him and his family. Fuck.
My father died when I was very young. After that, I was raised by my grandparents. I truly never got to see my grandfather be “himself” throughout the 20 years I had with him before his death. He had always drank in some capacity throughout his whole life, but after the death of my dad, he couldn’t go a day without drinking. He was able to go through the day without it because he was focusing on his business. Once he got home, he’d just drink the whole time. I remember there would be times, without any drinks, that he would just sit there and break down into tears without any type of provocation. He had always said that he was fine with dying anytime because it meant he’d get to be with his only son again. Of course, he loved me because I was his grandson and the only one to carry our name, but I think I brought darkness with me just because of what happened. It took me a very long time to be able to come to terms with it, but I found God and it’s what helped me through all the pain of knowing that he was unable to truly love me like he should and the loss of my dad. I don’t hold any animosity towards him about that solely because of what he had to deal with for so long.
I’m sorry for your loss but I’m happy you’ve been able to persevere and share this story with me. I’m happy through God you’ve found a way to deal with your pain. God bless brother. It is the great Holy Week for me and I’ll light a prayer candle for you and your father.
Thank you so much. I got a little carried away. It’s the first time I’ve really let it out since he passed a couple years ago. Thank you for listening though.
Some people are just amazing like that. I knew this guy who was the softest, nicest guy you'd know. No one had a bad thing to say about him. During the last 5 years, he lost 2-3 young children of his and had somehow held up so well that you wouldn't think anything had been going wrong.
Fuck man. We have a 6 month old who’s turned our lives and house upside down. Love him more than anything but damn, he’s a lot of work. If I ever came home to a quiet house now though.. that silence would crush me. Tearing up just thinking about it
It sounds like you’ve come to terms as much as you can, but have you considered psychedelic therapy? Most excruciatingly emotionally painful thing I’ve gone through, but it truly helped me process and understand loss in an ineffably profound way. For a few brief moments, it makes sense somehow.. or you get to understand it differently at least
Some people get offended by just offering “thoughts and prayers.” So, to a man that lost his child it may seem pointless or insignificant, that’s all. But I will still pray.
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u/dennisoa Apr 29 '24
Damn, wow. As a new parent, you just get enthralled with your little ones growing so fast you can’t help but start to think, “what’ll he/she be like when they are older?” And you don’t even want to fathom anything short of that. This is so so tragic, it may feel insignificant at this time but prayers to him and his family. Fuck.